PLEASE HELP! Cheating Partner?

jude

when a man lies when he could just as easily be truthful u know something isn't right. also all the photo's of her on his camera would cause u to believe there was more here than meets the eye. when a man begins to lie he is trying to cover something up or hide something.

Idontknowdoyou

Yes, the pics are a bit much.

Talk to him about it...just be calm and honest...and ask the same of him.

They work *all* alone? Odd. For 14 hours?

Visit him at work. Idk if a surprise visit would be nice or make him mad.

AnswerWhore

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice.....if it happens again...lies or otherwise...he goes squish like grape!

George McCasland - Papa Bear

Let's see. He's working in an industry where you have to trust your co-workers to not take a finger or two along with the bunch of grapes. He has pictures of her doing what, laying on her bed or doing their job? You never took photos of your co-workers? But, he knows you have low self esteem and a suspicious mind, so he hides the fact that she called to ask for the keys. How is any of the cheating.

If you're so concerned, join him on the harvest. I'm sure they could use the help.

Iroc3

he could be cheating, the pictures are a little much, all you do is ask him to see the pictures, and ask him to his face! if he isn't a liar then he wont be now! he did withhold the info from you about him and the call,...but he did tell you the truth, have you thought that he doesn't want you to think something is wrong, ! I don't want to make you go crazier than you are,...try calling him at work and talking to him for a while...and if he says he has to go than ask him why he doesn't want to talk to .....if he has time to take some picture of this female than he can spare few minutes for you while at work.....go to his job and tell him you want to help!
its hard to know without knowing more details....hope i have helped!

HandsomeDan

You're suggesting a shift of more than 12 straight hours in manual labor. That's not legal anywhere in the United States. Not to mention, NO ONE is going to do that kind of job for that long at a time, at least not here in the US, we're too spoiled as a nation.

That aside, many employers will post something along the lines of 11-1 as a 'range', meaning they need to fill shifts between those hours, but they're only going to make an employee fill 8 of those hours. There is a distinct possibility he may not be completely honest with you in a case like this.

Next, if he's lying about who called, there usually is more to it. Lies bear striking similarity to iceburgs, in that you only see a little bit of them, but there tends to be a lot more below the surface.

I'm not saying "Yes, he's cheating", but I suggest you make yourself more aware of what's going on lately. Has his interest in you fallen off lately, does he seem to want you as much? Does he seem fully attentive on you when he's home, or is his mind elsewhere? Be careful not to tread over the line of paranoia here either, that's not going to help you.

If he's not expressing as much interest in you physically or emotionally, you may have a problem. Do some 'behind the scenes' work, try checking the phone bill, they often reflect phone numbers, and even lengths of conversations. That's usually a pretty good tell, you may even be able to get a record of text messages too.

Lastly, keep this in mind:
If you search all these things, and you're not finding anything; there's a good chance that it means nothing. Don't feel bad about checking these things, it's something you need to do to appease yourself, and keep suspicion from turning ugly. If you find that you were way off, stop looking, don't let it become a regular checkup on him, that doesn't allow you to rebuild trust.

I wish you the best, and I hope things go well enough for you. I hope for your sake that he's not cheating, I've been cheated on by a spouse. No one deserves that, no one.

JUDY

This is how i see it if nothing was going on why would he lied to you in the first place. And if he lied once to you he will keep on lying.And i don't think having low self-esteem has anything to do with this. And nothing wrong with taking picture but if the picture is of the same person i would think there is something else going on.

Shannon

You might need marriage counseling to survive this.
If that's not feasible, the book below can help you get started, chapter 13 in particular is about affairs.

He's lying because he's ashamed as he should be.

And yes, one of things he must do is provide you with an accurate schedule and you get to check-up on him any time you want. Call his boss to verify his work hours. He goes to work on time, he comes home on time.

If he doesn't agree to the steps necessary to terminate his affair and rebuild your trust you must be prepared to leave him; separate at a minimum.

JYHoff

I think you are lying to us. Who works from 11 AM to 1 AM harvesting grapes. If you believe that you deserve to be cheated on.

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: