Please Help me.... marriage advice.?

Ok so... I am married now for a year. My husband and I have never had issues really.. but
There is a guy that I used to hang out with (we never dated) we were just friends and hung out. He has been texting me lately (knowing that I'm married)
He wanted to know why things couldnt work out and wanted to talk about things. I told him that i was married and that I was not talking to him about any of it b/c he and I had our chance and it's too late.
My husband found the texts in my phone.. he read a couple and stopped and asked me about it..
Of course I've not lied about anything b/c I do not want to be with this guy... I want to be with my husband and he has my whole heart.. BUT
I deleted the other messages and he asked to see them, but I had deleted them and my phone calls.. just b/c I didn't want to have anything in my phone related to the other guy
I never called him but I deleted the calls anyways.
My husband has found this WIERD.. and suspicious.. and I don't know how to explain to him that I'm not guilty (even though I look it)...
Anyone have advice??

leelee

Just explain to him your not guilty and you've erased them because they mean nothing and you did'nt want to make a mountain out of a mole hill. Advise him that you will not erase anymore if he chooses to text you again. If he does text you again my advise would be do not respond and confront your husband with the texts to update him and let him know. You could respond by telling him please don't text me again, I'm married, and then show your husband so he will beleive you are trying to avoid these problems, also always reassure your husband he is the one and the only one you love! Good luck!!

Kim H

just tell your husband that you do not have nothing to with guy that use to be your friend and you try to tell your husband you love him very much.

blues breaker

change your number so this guy can't contact you any more.

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Just be consistent and honest with him. Tell him you are not interested in this guy, that you are in love with him and him ONLY. Tell him you deleted the items because you didn't think anything of it being weird or suspicious, that you just deleted them because you got tired of looking at your call log.

My hubby deletes his call log every two days because he doesn't like it being long.

Mr O

he finds it suspicious because human brains work that way. Really talk to him about it and let him know that there's nothing going on. and it's time for you to cut off the old friend completely. Just as a general comment, i find women have difficult times letting go of the past for some reason even when it can do nothing but harm.

loca_liisa

Here is what I would do. I would talk with my husband and tell him that you want to set up a luncheon with your ex. Call your ex and tell him you wish to meet with him for lunch. That you and your husband would like to speak with him. You both meet with him and explain to him that you do not wish to have any phone messages from him any longer. That you both are married and he is in your past. If he does not wish to meet with you both, then have your husband speak with him over the phone and inform him to no longer contact you. If he does not wish to meet with you both, then you need to change your phone number(s) to prove to your ex that you wish to not speak to him. It is great you have been honest with your husband. Many marriages today are not honest. And I commend you for being honest. Please keep assuring your husband you love him and erase no messages. Allow him to read them all, but you both should meet with him and inform him to back off. Including your husband in this meeting is very important and will assure him he can trust you. I wish you luck.

melizza

just forget about it and your husband will too.

Tell him you'll be happy to call the guy up again in his presence and explain one more time that you're happily married and don't want to hear from him again. If that doesn't satisfy him, then it's no longer your job to try and soothe his insecurity: it's his to figure out where it's coming from and why it's so strong. (What was he doing looking at your phone anyway?)

MissingInAction

Give it to him like you know you want to on thr downlow.

Mean Carleen

For your hubby to be checking your phone in the first place it sounds like there is already a lack of trust issue. You can only tell the truth and keep telling the truth....

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