Pregnant by married man, need his help finacially he says no, am I wrong to expect help from him?

...as a kite.

NO. Get a lawyer and get a paternity test. Regardless of the fact that he is married, and you want to avoid court, the child deserves better. And how much did *he* respect his family, if he was in a relationship with you?

It's his responsibility. Most states, even if you give up parental rights (like visitation), will make the parent pay child support.

My best wishes to you and your family. Things will get better.

six_foot_2_midget

Well........I guess you shouldn't have messed around with a married man.

Dani

Two children and another on the way. Married man in picture. No sympathy here whatsoever. How are you making ?120 on bed rest... that sum is false. Something doesn't jell here.Another level One 14 year old having fun ?

sweetgranny06

his wife pro bally didn't know about you either if he was separated from her if she didn't know he should be honest and tell her about you and the baby it takes two so its his fault too for cheating on his wife and getting another women pregnant but he should do right by the baby its not your unborn babys fault and you can have the court to make him pay child support he might want a dna

abc

well you were wrong to be sleeping with him; with that said, you will have to go to court after the baby is born, get a paternity test, then ask for support; you messed up big time and your children get to pay the price.....you are a piece of work.

J W

No, you aren't. Destroying his family life won't help either.

hotbutter

its not wrong to expect financial support. but you will have to expect alot of problems with this man and those around him.

He has an obligation to the child you are carrying, not the children you already have. It sounds like the relationship continued even after you found out he was married. How is it possible to be with a man for over a year and not know he's married?

Why do you need him to call you? It sounds as though you are trying to continue the relationship. You have conceived a child with a married man and now you are facing the consequences.

Legally he has to pay a percentage of your medical bills and child support after the child is born. You are responsible for yourself and the children you already had. Stop having children you can't support. Stop screwing married men.

Fotomama

That was pretty selfish of you, getting involved with a married man is pretty dumb! How about giving the baby a good home with two parents who love him/her, with a mom and daddy who are not going to raise him/her in poverty? How about giving the child a daddy anyhow?

msthinkpositive

You already had two kids, so how would you expect a married guy to react to your getting another baby. You had ways of preventing this pregnancy, so he shouldn't feel sorry, and you should have stopped being with him once you found out he was married. There's no excuse for your destroying a marriage because of your negligence. Both of you need to pay the consequence for bring a child in such a situation.

sylviavnpttn

some of these answers just amaze me. like your Some piece of dirt- sweetie to hell with what some of these rude people say take that man to court and make him help with the financial responsibilities. You are not to blame for it takes two. As for his family please did he think of them when he started dating you. NOPE. Girl put your head up take a good long look at yourself- your one beautiful person and soon to be a mother again so get with the program and get your buns down to county and file for maintenance on that baby. one more thing- for all of you that have judged this unfortunate situation may you never have to walk a mile in her shoes and may God forgive you for disrespect and ignorance.

kat_luvr2003

that's what you get for screwing with married men,you get treated like the dirt you are!

babieshay27

well first of all as soon as you found out he was married you should of stopped seeing him then. I'm not surprised he's acting this way cause he's married. But yes I do agree he should help financially. But in a way you put yourself in this situation by sleeping with a married man. But what's done is done. You just may have to go to the extra step and go after him.

Willnotlietoyou

Support collections bureau.Call his wife,Go talk to her when you know he's at work,Call his boss.Do what ever it is you have to do for him to pay child support.He should be made to pay for what is his.

M B

No, you aren't wrong. Obviously he didn't respect his family when he began sleeping with you. I'd tell him that if he doesn't help that I am going to go to child support enforcement.
I know some people might be disrespectful toward you for your decision to be with a married man, I'm not going to. It does take two after all, and he is the one who is married. We all make bad decisions, however, you are being responsible for yours by carrying the baby. He should own up to his half of the responsibility as well.

cardgirl2

First of all not to chastise you but it was a mistake to get involved with a married man. But now you are the mother of his child and need help. You know he can be taken to court and the court could order DNA tests if he refuses to support the child. He is responsible for this child if it his, and he knows it. He is just hoping you will just give up and go away, but you need his help with the child. He doesn't have to see the child, but he is obligated to pay child support, so don't let him get away with it. He is really acting like a real cad, but again he lied to you, let you fall in love and impregnated you and now he will not take responsibility for the child. Wow what a nice guy you fell for...He is the typical cheater who doesn't give a care for the woman he is having an affair with, he just uses her and then when things get tough, he walks away...Don't tell his wife, don't threaten him, just take him to court...He will have to answer the summons. He may come around and support his child in the end. I wish you well.

Colleen O

"I didn't know that he had a wife, or a family for almost a year." And when you found out did you break it off with him or continue being his concubine? He is a man with a family and is FIRST priority is to his family. YOU put yourself where you are not not he. This is what happens when you CHOOSE to maintain an affair with a married man...their legitimate families come first.

Rose K

well let me start by saying I am married and if my hubby cheated on me I would want to know. Second when you found out he was married you should have split. He messed up his marriage when he put his d*** in you. Now he turned his back on you- You need to turn your back on him. And make him take responsibility..

Chris

just don't kill the rabbit

Rudi A

If you can prove that the newborn is his then yes
you can demand help but the only way is through
the courts. Time to think about the newborn and to
heck with anything else. You seem to have made
a few mistakes in your life and you need to get
yourself in order as you say you already have 2
kids; You need to get to really know a person be-
fore you jump in bed with that person. The way
you are going all you will be doing is raising kids
and that will get you less of a chance of getting a
man to help you because no man wants a woman
with a bunch of kids that is not his own. Good luck
and use the courts if you expect any help.

piepiepie

Well, in a perfect world men would be allowed to sign away all paternal rights during pregnancy as a sort of figurative abortion. Then if the woman chooses to keep the child, she is choosing to be a single mother, but alas, it doesn't work that way. So, in this world, no you are not wrong to expect help from him. Sure, you slept with him, but as they say 'it takes two to tango.' So what if you mess up his relationship with his wife. It's not as if he wasn't one in the wrong as well. Take him to court or you know, respect the fact that he doesn't want that child and next time, don't get knocked up.

Sagira Tadashi

Child support. He can support you he's just afraid of what his wife will do and how it will affect his family. It might cause a divorce or a super duper amount of tension between the two. Court is your friend. Don't listen to him. It took two to tango now he has to pay. And not telling you he was married for a year is such a good sign.. he
's a liar... take him down.

You need the money.. it is not a want....

Wondering

He wants you to respect his wife and family.What the he11 was he thinking whenever both of you were doing the deed.
It takes two and he should be responsible for his actions. It may be the end of his marriage but you should explain to him and maybe her to that this is something that has to be dealt with. Mention to him that you are going to talk to his wife and explain the situation.I bet he will do the right thing then.

kitkat

You didn't make the right choice for yourself by continuing to sleep with him after you found out about his wife and family. You need to make the right choice for your child. You NEED to go to court for paternity and child support. That is the right thing to do...

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