Relationship Help please?

I got married in January but I have an issue with my husband from almost two years ago. About three months after we started dating I broke up with him and I kissed someone else. I came back to my husband and I told him. We fought about it for a while, but eventually it stopped coming up. We got married in January after he joined the army. Currently he is Georgia and I am in New York. Lately it has been coming up and we have gotten in several fights about it. He has said that he doesn't love me anymore and wants a divorce. In these fights I bring up that he still talks to one of his ex girlfriends when he doesn't even want me talking to guys that he knows. He knows that I don't want him talking to her but he still does and I try not to get mad. But when I talk to him a few hours later, he doesn't remember saying that. Does he still love me? Or does he really want the divorce? I know that it will be difficult and it has been, but I don't want to lose him. And I know that I shouldn't get upset about him talking to her, but I do. Can you help?
Additional Details
What about the fact that he doesn't remember saying these things to me?

Katie M

Sorry but it sounds like he is looking for a reason to get out of the marriage. What you did was wrong but you weren't married and it was only a kiss. Big deal. He needs to come out and be honest with you. Good luck.

Critical_rationalist

he wants more freedom for himself than he does for you. He's jealous and immature, and should try counseling, and if he refuses or it doesn't work, it's time to move on.

Willie J

I think you have an excellent opportunity to get out before it is too late. Two years ago is a long time. I think he is jealous and controlling. I think it is an unhealthy relationship that you can get out before it is too late.

Ihateiis

OK now listen up im 12 but my mom has been married 2 times and my dad 4 so i know what its about Love is a smoke raised with the fume of sighs,
Being purged, a fire sparkling in lovers' eyes,
Being vexed, a sea nourished with lovers' tears.
What is it else? A madness most discreet,
A choking gall and a preserving sweet.
-Shakespeare

If you don't feel the flame the love,ect. what are you doing just standing there if you guys are fighting im not there so i dont know if he is the 1 but if you guys are fighting wait talk to him let him know what you are feeling maybe things will change

just read what i worte AND YES I DID WRITE THIS SO DONT CALL ME FAKE~!

Love is a smoke raised with the fume of sighs,
Being purged, a fire sparkling in lovers' eyes,
Being vexed, a sea nourished with lovers' tears.
What is it else? A madness most discreet,
A choking gall and a preserving sweet.
-Shakespeare
These deep and passionate words quoted love. Saying that love is a fume and an endless road of love, that love is like a eternal flame that never ends.
To me love it like a long road that never ends, with ups and downs, but there are always dead ends on some roads where you just have to turn around and keep on going.
There are many different types of love family love, extra love (such as pets) and deep love the love of your life.
But the real question is does love exist? Is there any actual proof of love? My answer is yes. Once you see the real flame, the real touch it just never ends with the one the true love. But the real evidence is kissing and making love it shows the bond of 2 lovers, it shows that you care, that they are important to you.
If the world didnâ€™t have any love at all. The world would be upside down a hell we would all be devils slaving, sneaky, dangerous. But not everyone has love; these people are wasting their lives on being unhappy and not stepping into the unknown.
Who is the one? The one is the one where you get the funny feeling around, the one that makes you all sweaty and nervous to think about him or her. So what does marriage mean? Personally I think marriage is a big step of life, a commitment saying Iâ€™m yours and whatâ€™s mine is whatâ€™s yours.

Shyne_06

I know I'm not the best person to give advice on relationships b/c I'm also seeking answers, but it seems as if he really meant what he said. He does not love you anymore. My bf said the same thing and it's true. I can see the changes. Girl, I'm sry to say this but you need get out of the relationship and stay strong. He is llooking for excuses to brk up with u.

gd luck

Jon's girl

Everyone is right he is looking for a reason to get out of the marriage let it go and move on your the one going to get hurt in the long run yes kissing someone was wrong but he said i do anyways and that is when forgiveness shouldve began. sounds like he has decided to be vengeful

Variable 46

It sounds like both of you are somewhat immature, and far too immature to enter into an "adult" contract like marriage. This is not a slam, either. We were all "immature" at one time.

But now you are stuck in this contract, so what to do? Don't give up too quickly...talk to a marriage counselor, even if you have to go to one by yourself. A trained professional can help you sort out your feelings, and you'll get far better advice than you'll ever get from a bunch of strangers on YA. After that, you may have the direction to either pursue a reconciliation or a divorce (or an annulment). Based on what you've written, I'm inclined to bet on the latter; in which case, live a little and mature a lot before you get into another serious relationship.

Good luck.

scorpgoddess

Relationships are high maintenance and distance just makes them more so and more difficult to tend to.
Remember that when humans fight, our goal is usually to win and hurt our opponent, so everything that is said in the heat of an arguement needs to be taken with a grain of salt.
It sounds like you both will have to put in some serious work to sort this through. The good news is that you're still talking so that's a possibility.
Get some counselling, a neutral third party will give you lots to think about and a new perspective on things.

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