Relationship question...?

artistagent116

The next time she throws you out. Keep walking.

Marie

you need to make her understand from the beginning ( now) that you will not tolerate this type of behavior and there are better ways to deal with issues..instead of sending you away..stay up, hash it out, lose sleep to make her happy

cafe_au_lait

she sounds unstable, don't marry her. A divorce later on will be very difficult for everyone involved. get couples counseling.

mclovin!

Ouch. She sounds kinda buts tbh. What was the text about? Tell her that she's too controlling because it sounds like she was invading your privacy.

ruebezahl2001

You both need to see a counselor. It's important that she finds better ways to deal with arguments.

phxchik07

yeesh...she's a bit psycho, no? Talk to her, find out what is really bothering her. Has she always been like this? She seems REALLY irrational! If she doesn't care to work things out calmly, then I say that it might be time to move on.

El Ar

Next time you leave, don't come back. This sounds like a broken record and she sounds like a psycho.

desiarnazlover

You need to either leave her for good or take her to counseling. Anything else you try to do will not work. You need to make a drastic move in order for her to see.

Junk

she has no right to do that to you, i mean come on its your own brother, that sent YOU something. It's up to you what you want to do about it.

gutterflower.

couples counseling works like a charm.

sit down with her during a neutral time when you both are pretty relaxed, and talk about it. does she not trust you? is she insecure? does she feel wronged? the best way to stop such a thing is to find out what's making her tick.

gooooooood luck.

Posh

Counseling for the sake of the child. Regardless of what you do, it has to be in the best interest of your son. Even if you break up, you will never be totally apart because of your son. You have to learn to communicate, even when you or she are mad. I recommend a class called "interpersonal communications".

Kim

Counseling...she obviously needs help with anger management and you might benefit in gaining some ways to cope with her behaviors as well as to help her work through the troubles she is having. Be each others comfort and help. Best wishes!

ASHLEY

That's a tough situation. My suggestion is try NOT talking to her when she decides she's ready, that way you can give her a taste of her own medicine. I definetely don't suggest leaving after an argument but it may just be her way of needing space to clear her head and really think about the situation. If you don't respond to her reaching out she will hopefully realize how she makes you feel. After she comes to her senses about everything sit her down and try explaining to her that there are better ways of handling the situation and of course its understandable that you both have to calm down. Reach a realistic goal together on how to handle the next aftermath of a fight. She sounds just like a friend of mine, her boyfriend ended up leaving her and she was miserable and wanted him back.... by that time it was too late. Don't let it get too far because you will probably end up resenting her and staying in the relationship for the wrong reason. Good luck!

audrey_kolar

well it sounds like you dont want to go through the emotional stress and the only reason your there is cause of your baby either sit her down and tell her straight up im not coming back next time or leave and dont come back next time

Monsieur Rick

I am sorry to say that how she handles disagreements or arguments are overt red flags to the potential success of your relationship. You cannot change her, you can only change how you respond to her. How does your 5 month old son react to this? You are in an emotional minefield and are slowly becoming a regular casualty. One day she will tell you to leave, but you won't want to come back. Who would? Imagine relationships where the woman never raises her voice to her husband and visa versa.

If she is willing to accept that she has a few issues (e.g. anger management, conflict resolution, effective communication), then professional therapy can help. If not you will be the victim of emotional homicide.

Brenda~Lee

Sounds like your fiance needs to grow up! Before you say "I do" to your fiance, I think it's best she goes to counseling first or perhaps you both can go before you take this relationship to the next step. Good Luck!

Allison S

I am in way a man, but here is what I think.

This woman has a problem, she wants to control you. If you keep going back everytime she puts you out, she will continue to abuse you in this manner.

You have right to be comfortable in this relationship, the next time she puts you out, stay away until you are ready to go back. Make it known that you will not longer be treated this way. If she wants you she has to learn to speak to you in a calm manner at all time.

You on the other have to take control of this issue, no marriage will survive this, so be careful.

shanobi187

go to relationship counseling, it sounds like the two of you are in need of some serious help in the area of communication

moochie1967

Did she act this way before she had the baby? I'm just curious if there could be some postpartum depression.

D.Y.

MAN UP AND TELL HER U DONT WANT THIZ TO HAPPEND AND IF SHE KICKZ U OUT DEN DONT ANSWER HER KALLZ REMEBER 2 CAN PLAY DAT GAME....OR U CAN TALK TO HER ABOUT IT AND TELL HER DATZ ITZ WRONG AND YA CAN WORK OUT TO AN AGREEMENT

Jackie

You two can try couple's counseling. It seems like she is just one of those people who react before they think, and then later regret it. If she can work on ways of controlling that, things might improve. Is it possible that she's PMSing when she does this? Good luck. I hope you two can work it out :)

socrates

You two should agree not to throw anybody out or run away. Instead, engage in different activities; not TV because you should do that activity actively. But don't be too quick to turn your back. At first, try to solve the problem with a talk, not with an argument.

Daisy

She is very immature!!

I know, because I was just like that-and it cost me dearly.
She needs help. My guess is that she grew up in a home raised where that was normal. Blow up, and then try to patch it up after. She needs to be educated about communication.

I think you should ask if she would be willing to see a third party-counselor if you can afford it, or other family resources-like a pastor. She is insecure, she's cutting you off before you get a chance to leave her-she is protecting herself from your eventual leaving-because inside she really doesn't think she's worthy of you-so she creates chaos. She is probably addicted to it.

The behavior you describe is very destructive, and sorry to say it, cannot be changed without the help of an outside party. Pray for her, too. In the meantime, until she gets herself back in line, be prepared for the daily rollercoaster.

If there was not a child involved, I would recommend to end it, because you can't change her behavior. Marriage means for better or worse, so, you need to examine if you can live up to that vow. She has to want to change, and see that she needs to. You have a son with her, you want it to work, and it can, but only with the right tools.

The book of Proverbs describes a "contentious" woman. It helped me to see what I was doing, maybe if you read it together she will see herself, too. (NOT trying to push my beliefs down your throat-just telling you what woke me up!)

kakeydec

get some relationship counseling.. your girlfriend probably has some pent up issues she hasnt dealt with and its coming out on you in a destructive way.....

But before you get married and for the future mental stability of your child seek out some couples couneling...

talk to her about it and give her a time peirod in ur head.... then if she doesnt change then u can go ur seperate way or what ever u need to do

Loo

I think you need to sit down and have a heart to heart. have someone babysit and have a night to talk over all the things you have been fighting about and other things that worry you. Also add in positive things so it's not just a downer conversation.

jay k

You need to put your foot down.

How can you be secure in your relationship when she blows up every other day? I really don't think this is the type of girl you (or any other guy for that matter) would want to marry, and it's good that you figured that out now.

She sounds not only like a drama queen but a psychotic stalker as well. Who reads other people's text messages? Run while you can, this girl is definitely not a keeper.

just me

dude, you have to talk to her, she obviously cares allot for you, because she calls you back, and wants to talk. but you have to let her know that it is just not fair the way she treats you. Tell her that next time she does that you might not want to talk to her or come back to her, because your tired of her actions!. :]

The next time she tries to throw you out.....DON'T! Don't go anywhere. That WILL cause a bigger arguement, but it seems like she has a minor anger management issue.

When she gets mad over something that she really shouldn't get that mad at, Hold her and tell her you're not going anywhere and that you love her and need to work it out without you leaving!

I used to do that with an ex. Kick him out and then call him back. She needs time to clear her head before she talks.

She needs to learn how to solve her problems, WITH you... WITHOUT kicking you out. And the best way to do that is to show her that you are there and that you are not leaving and you love her. Remind her that you are engaged and if you get married, you are there for her for life.

GOOD LUCK.

360

Counseling will help this.

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: