Serious answers please!! This man is scaring me & I really NEED help?
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Serious answers please!! This man is scaring me & I really NEED help?
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Please please help me...I use to like this man, he was sweet, intelligent & very successful, but he was on “depression pills, he tried to kill himself in the past. Furthermore he has done some really crazy things in his life time. His 28yrs old and I am 21, I meet him through my brother in law. & I really thought that we where going to get married some day because we had a strong connection. & because he asked me to “marry him”. But I said that it was too soon...because we only knew each other for 7weeks. He would call me 6times a day & we would be on the phone for hours & he would always came and see me. but sadly my brother in law and my sister and My brother in laws family hate him because he has a bad past and they never talk with him and they never go near him and they told me to stay away. But I didn’t listen to them at the TIME and I kept on dating him. but later on my sister and brother in law found out that I was talking to him and they went nuts and they told me that he went around and told everyone that me and him where going to get married in the next few months and he said that he was going to take me away without anyone knowing and he told them that I didn’t want them to know because it was a secret and that caused so much trouble for me and for my family. because they actually thought that I was going to run off with him. I asked him if that was true but he said that he didn’t know what I was talking about and he just lied to me and I almost lost my sister and family over him because he said so many bad things about my family. So I got upset and I just stopped talking with him and he said that he knew nothing about this furthermore he went overseas for a business trip so I cut off all contact with him and I haven’t talked with him since & I have moved on. But now he is back and my sister told me that he has been trying to get in touch with her husband and his brothers. But they don’t answers his phone calls and they never talk with him so I found that to be very strange because he told me that he never talks with them but he knows that I am close to my brother in law But my sister & her Husband said that I should be alert since he might be up to something
I just want to know why do you think he is calling them up after all this time?? And do you think his trying to get back with me? because my family told him to stay away from me and he knows that they will kill him if he comes near me and I would never go back to him so please don tell me that because I know that already, but I just want to know why he keeps on calling my brother in law and his brothers, he never talks with them ….I just want to know what u think so please. Answer that question for me because I can’t understand it
Do you think his up to something? Because his dad and him haven’t stoped calling them and they both know that I will never talk with him again and they know that Im close to my brother in law and my sister
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Brandee
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Have dealt with this- when I was 'seeing' a guy (we talked on the phone and computer, but only met in person three times over a course of a few months), and broke up with him because I was dating/interested in my now husband, he couldn't take the hint I wanted to be left alone. He would beg in pages long IMs (printed them so I had proof for anyone who doubted I was encouraging him or playing two guys) to call him, he needed me, wanted to be only friends, etc......my hubby emailed him after bothering me for a week or so, telling him I wasn't interested and to leave me alone; he moved onto emailing my family- I guess to get details and see if they could convince me otherwise. My family tried to explain to him he made his bed and to lie in it (leave me alone and move on), but it took time.
If you're worried- do as I did, change your numbers (you can't have your family change theres, but possibly keep a track of when he calls or if the phone bill has specific call details, keep it), keep any proof of contact (list of dates and times he tries to contact you or family, mail, email, etc), and if it's extreme, contact the police, ask them to speak to him as a neutral party and explain to him he's harassing you and your family, or file for a protective order (in my state, you can list homes and phone numbers to not contact- list all yours and family that he contacts)...maybe he needs that kind of wake up call.
When he calls or your family, have them answer the phone- explain simply and calmly you stop contacting you/family, and hang up...depending on the state, harassment is when a person needs to request three times to leave alone in short period of time. Example- my hubby's ex wife knew what I was going to do (call the cops and file ex parte) if she continued to verbally harass us. I answered the door (her and hubby gets extremely verbal when meeting), and let her try to explain why she was there (claimed it was time to pick up son, wasn't) and I calmy said, no it isn't, now please leave my residence, she then went on the use profanity, and I smiled and asked please leave my residence; i know you're upset- she caught on if I had to say please leave once more, she'd be in the wrong....so she left (but I would've loved to get her) |
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Katie
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i'd just stay alert, not checking the closets or anything when you come home, but alert. and if he does try to contact you again just ignore him... if he keeps it up answer the phone once and tell him to please leave you alone and hang up (don't intice him) then if he continues after you've asked him to stop i'd go to the police and get a restraining order (he seems fishy to me) |
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Lela A
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maybe making police reports and being alert to things about him..keeping yourself self.. |
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shravya
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OMG he sounds a bit crazy..i think he might be obsessed with you and he might be dangerous, im not trying to scare you but please be careful and if the phone calls continue go to the cops..maybe you can get a restraining order. |
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Reverend Willy
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It is a good possibility that he was on pills for something other than just depression. From what you describe he sounds somewhat obsessive and could actually be Border Line or have some other form of disassociative reality disorder.
My advice is to be careful, if you get the chance tell him you wish no further contact (unless you have already told him so) and avoid him. Should he continue unwanted attempts to contact you or even show up, you may have to have a restraining order placed on him.
Reverend Willy |
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Greyhound Mama
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It certainly does sound a bit off.
If you have broken up with him and will not take his calls, then just be vigilant. It's very good that others are refusing his calls as well. It sounds as though he is obsessed with you, but hopefully he will get the hint.
In the mean time, document all of this in a journal or something and let your family know about it. Keep track of dates, times, events of how and when he tries to contact you and any other odd behavior. If he gets more insistent in talking with you, then go to the police.
Good luck. |
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ouragon
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So he wants to kill himself and your family will kill him if he tries to see you. Very dramatic. Crazy, in fact, is how you all sound. Stalker behavior, and everyone in both families involved. Basically, you all sound nuts. |
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Additional Details
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No Spam
Adult 
Gambling
Unfinished
Deception
Plagiarism
Not English
