Should I feel guilty?

Rockmeister

I feel that you are being smart & responsible!
There is NO way anyone should be made to feel guilty for being responsible!
Don't worry about it, and don't focus on it.

Let it all settle down and become the past, so it isn't something that stays a problem with you two.
He wasn't really mad means it will settle if you let it.

You did good, made me smile that you are that responsible! : )

bina64davis

You made the exact right decision. Good for you!

Violet Pearl

I think you need to take care of your child for a while- you're very young, so taking precautions is a smart idea. In the end, you're the one who will carry a baby to term, and generally care for the child afterwards, so I agree with you.

wishingstar50

Look its your decision more than his . Dont let him bully you into having another kid right now ! Just do what you think is right!

missthang229

I feel that it is mainly the womans choice. You are the one that has to do all the work. You shouldnt feel the least bit guilty.

NY Yanks Girrl

Not at all its your body and your the only one thniking about the future. He dosen't care b/c he dosen't help you, you soo did the right thing!!!!!!!

bronzebabekentucky

your husband should be happy!
ignore him!

Douglas ?

No and its your body. I would make him wear condoms and say no glove no love.

You did the right thing for you. Do not feel guilty for protecting your own future. There are no guarantees in life and there is no guarantee that any marriage is forever. Having multiple children before you can fully support yourselves would only increase the likelihood of your marriage straining under financial burdens too great for your young shoulders. I've been with my husband over 8 years, 90% of our arguments have started because of the almighty dollar or not having enough of them. ;)

Awakened

You did the right thing and he shouldn't be mad also with not helping with the little one i'd tell him how you feel about that.

mysticmoonprincess01

Ashlee, I applaud you. You did the right thing. Babies are very expensive and I would wait to have another one later. I had my son when I was 33 and that is all I have. One child was enough for me.....stand up for yourself and remain a firm, positive woman.....

Normally I would say its wrong to do that without talking first to your husband, but in your case that was the exact right thing to do. Being young, married, and with one kid that he doesnt help with anyway, your choice was best!

misguidedrose18

No, you shouldn't feel guilty! You made a mature, responsible decision. Your husband's decision was based, most likely, on the fact the he loves having babies, since he's NOT the one who'd carry them or take care of them. His level of understanding will come around to yours eventually.

Kim

I think you made a really good choice. You need time to grow up. and you already have one child. He will get used to the idea and maybe one day he will thank you for that. Good luck and congratulations

1978girl

It's your body and you'll be the one carrying a child for 9 months and then caring for it once it comes out. No way you should feel guilty! You guys should get your lives going the direction you want them to go and when you're BOTH ready go off birth control!

auditor4u2007

Would you feel guilty if you were smarter than him? You did the right thing and had the brains to realize it. If he is still a child about it, leave him live with his thoughts. I surely wouldn't worry about it.

SGT. Dillers Wifey

i think you made teh right descion. Regardless whether he wants you on birth control you are not ready for anytoher chilkd right now and he should respect your wishes. It is not his choice alone wheter not you should have any more kids right now. I htink your descion was wise. Ask him to help you with the baby more and that when you are older and more prepared you will reconsider having another child. You are both still young and have plenty of times for more children.

PharmNerd

That is a tough question. Normally I would say yes but the bottom line is you two are very young (I was only a year older when I got preggers and married) and this is a very huge step. It is smart not to want to bring another child into this world until you guys are better prepared. Hopefully your husband will see it this way soon. Good luck

Been There Done That

Sounds like you got married because you got pregnant.....I believe that you made the right decision, but you could have discussed it more with your man and come to some kind of agreement.....Don't worry right now his feelings are wounded and he will get over it.

suthurnbabe

No, you should not feel guilty. You are doing what is best for the both of you and your future children, even though your husband may not realize it yet. You are being a responsible wife and mother. Just enjoy the precious little one you have now and eachother. God Bless.

ugochi

you made the right decision. if he can't see the importance of waiting until you guys are ready to actually have another baby, then i don't know what to tell you. but you did the right thing because in the end it is better for everyone involved.

Dee

You did the right thing. Just because you are married does not make your body belong to your husband. Since he does not help you with the baby that you already have I can see that he would not mind having another one whenever it happens. However you are the one that is doing everything and if you did get pregnant again it would be your body going through pregnancy and child birth. I think that it should be a decision between the two of you if and when to have more children but that you ultimately have control of your own body.

Trynitee

I think u made the responsible decision and i applaud u, too many people bring unwanted children into this world and the children end up suffering for it. Your husband will get over it and will thank u one day. You both r very young, if u want more children someday all it takes is a simple doctors appointment to make it possible again.

amandapjohn

I think you made a great decision

John Timothy

You should not feel guilty, Ashlee. You should not feel guilty about making decisions regarding your body and your life. You should not feel guilty about being smarter than your husband. You should not feel guilty about planning for consequences instead of just accepting them. And, for heaven's sake, you should not feel guilty about being a responsible person. You did the right thing. I congratulate you for that!

Jamie

You definitely shouldn't feel guilty. It sounds like your husband is not mature enough to be either a husband or a father. Best of luck with the baby!!!

TermiteChokinOnASplinter

You have absolutely no reason to feel guilty. Your body belongs to you and you alone. It is completely your decision if you want to wait to have more children or to be on birth control. 18 is such a young age to have even one! It seems to me, your husband doesn't realize how much you actually have to do to take care of your little one. If he wants you to have more kids, he should be taking on at least half the responsibilities so he understands what he is actually getting into. Maybe let him take care of the baby BY HIMSELF for one full day and night (stay at your parent's house or at a girlfriend's to get away for the night). I think by morning, he'd understand why you went on birth control and will support your decision 100%.
If he still doesn't see it your way, again, it is your body and your decision. Birth control is not permanent! When you're ready to take on another child, and he's willing to put forth some of the work to help you, you should talk about having another. In the mean time, enjoy new baby :) Take care and good luck!

lizjess2000

no dont feel guilty your both still young, children r hard work u both need to wait until u r older before even thinking of having more children.

dorananddeb

From a guys perspective. You did what you felt you had to do. You knew there was a problem with him not really helping with you child already. By doing this, you did prevent any further complications in your life. Once you feel he is mature enough to be involved with his children and you are ready, then undo what was done. He will be hurt because of what you did and against his will but, if he really understands that you feel his lack of involvement with your other child causes you doubt, he may then understand. It is teamwork raising children. I work full time, 7 days a week, and my wife is a stay at home mom but, I still get involved with my child.

Proud Mama of 4

You made a great decision. You should feel good about it. It is your body, you get to decide if and when you get pregnant. Things should be discussed, but obviously he hasn't matured YET. Give him time. Good luck to you all. Enjoy your baby. Its a wonderful, difficult time.

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