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Should I leave my husband if he has an addiction to strip clubs?
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Should I leave my husband if he has an addiction to strip clubs?

He lies about going everytime, but eventually gets caught. I already assured him that I don't mind him going occasionally and that all I want is for him to be honest. But he goes there frequently and denies it all the time until I have proof (one time, I saw a bank statement stating an ATM withdrawal of $300 at "the Dollhouse"- obviously a strip club). He told me he went because I never gave him a lapdance at home. Well, if the dummy asked me in the first place I would have!! So, I did... give him all the lapdances he wanted. But did that stop him? NOO!! He continued paying visits to these institutions, which made me feel rejected and not good enough. I believe I'm very attractive and even get approached by men on a daily basis, but he doesn't seem to be satisfied. He's very possessive and protective with me... he won't let me go out with friends and even gives me a curfew when I'm with my family... yet, he believes it's okay for him to see other naked women and have them rub on him.


    




Stephen K
Rating
Seek counseling first before you leave. But I would admit the lying is troublesome


JeffyB
Your hubby has a problem, and it's not just strip-clubs. If he lies to you for whatever reason, on a regular basis, that's a real problem. Also, if he is dropping $300 at strip clubs, that's probably not just to "watch". Then he treats you like crap & is overly possessive?? He's a loser. Dump him.


sandg94
You already know the answer, and you already know there are too many more men who would worship you instead of treating you this way. You deserve much better!


Ray2play
Rating
I can think of SO many other reasons to leave. He is insecure so he lies. He lacks self esteem so he wastes his money. And certainly not least but most important, the word is not protective, it is abusive.


yellowjeff
Rating
Lose him.


kat_luvr2003
Rating
yes move on and let the strippers support him


daisylynn
leave him


Grampa
Rating
He's a bum. Leave.


I See You
Rating
There was an episode on Dr. Phil about this very same thing last week. Your husband needs counseling (but of course that won't work unless he WANTS to go). I also wonder how much money this guy is actually spending. Your husband could easily put the TWO of you into serious debt. I would recommend talking to him about counseling, and if he refuses, I would definitely leave him. He is obviously showing no respect for you, but you must respect yourself.


greengrass
Rating
if its that big of a problem then yes i would leave him, he is controlling u and that isnt right.


skyla i
Rating
Honestly, I would dump him. You never know if he likes one of those stripers! If he lies to all the time that is not a good thing. Let him go you cn do better then that.


deepi_cool21
Rating
what r u waiting 4......go ahead ...leave him ...


Laura
Sounds like you have a loser Miss D. Any wife that is willing to give her hubby lap dnces to keep him stirred up is doing the above and the beyond. He's just all caught up in the "grass is greener' syndrome. And I think most men enjoy looking at naked women, but this joker has one at home that will give him all he needs and he's still making trips to the pump..............


caity<33
Rating
wow he seems way too controlling.. just leave you live ONCE do you want to spend it bad or good? if you're as attractive as you claim i'm sure you won't have trouble finding a guy that's worth something.. you should feel like you're his everything and if you don't .. don't waste your time


mmcho123
Just leave him.


kaypiccolo
Wow hun I have been there. You are your own person, you should be able to do what ever you want to do. And if he loves you he would know this. The strip club thing is kinda weird. My boyfriend (for 3 years) sometimes goes with his best friend, or me sometimes just cuz it is fun. But you hubby sounds like he has a problem. I would not get divorced cuz of the strip club but the other problems that you have. Girls need to have there time too, just like men do. I hope every thing turns out okay, If you ever need to talk hit me up on IM. :)


Ken
Rating
Your husband has some issues that he needs to deal with. If he is not willing to, then you may have no choice. The primary issue here seems to be the dishonesty. Honest and open communication are the cornerstone of any successful relationship. You do not have that in this case. There is a reason that he is going to strip clubs and he probably doesn't even know what that reason is. He should get professional counselling. Perhaps facing the possibility of losing you will bring him back to reality from his fantasy world. You don't say how much money he makes, but $300 is a lot of money for a person to spend without consulting his wife. How would he react if you went to see male strippers and spent $300?


LilMiss143
Rating
First Id try giving him a dose of his own medicine. Tell him you and the girls are hitting up an all male strip club, and that you dont know what time youll be home. See how he likes that. If that doesnt get him rethinking his ways, try the honest approach: Cry your eyes out to him. Tell him how awful he's making you feel. Tell him that youre the one he married and this is just as terrible as cheating. He's lying to you all the time and just tearing the relationship apart. Tell him youre scared about what this is doing to youre relationship. Tell him you want your husband back. Even tell him that youre thinking of leaving him and that your willing to do anything to keep the relationship, but he needs to give you more of himself. If he doesnt change his ways within two months, Im sorry but its time to say buh-bye. You're not getting what you deserve out of the relationship anymore. Good Luck with this.


CoCo Queen
Rating
You should have a party at your house with a male stripper next time he gets ghost and make sure he comes home and sees the male stripper. Since he wants to give you a curfew, just say, "I can't get my entertainment in the street like you, so I decided to have it come to me." THEN leave him!!! Make sure that this party is your going away party so you can leave when all of your guests leave and you won't have to stick around to hear him whine and wild out about the situation.


kellipie68
Well dint threaten him about leaving just do it. And if he really loves you then you to will figure it out.


eyes_of_iceblue
You have to make a choice, either accept his behavior and join him at the clubs and have him go to a Chip & Dales with you. That might open his eyes to how you feel.
Or tell him that if the lieing doesn't stop, your going to have to make other plans with your life.
He is absoulety guilty of something or he wouldn't give you a crufew, when he has none.
Good Luck.


Jon
Well, if he treats you that way, then you have no choice but to leave him. Its not right for him to treat you that way.


The one who knows
Rating
He has control issues. IF you want to stay with him then I recommend that you do couples counseling. If the two of you go to counseling and it still doesn't work, then you might want to look at the pros and cons of your relationship. Best of Luck!


bringnsxybackn07
Rating
No, don't leave him. Talk to him about going to a marriage couselor. He obviously has a problem. He is possessive and protective of you because he knows he is wrong in what he is doing. My ex husband used to be like this, but he was also abusive. Try the couseling before you give up and leave him.


?
well being over protective reminds me of a man I know. and honey he is the biggest cheater I have ever known. I don't know your husband but it sounds bad. I would leave if I was you. I have a man (different man) who went to strip clubs without me knowing and his friend told me later after we split up that he was getting more then a lap dance at these places.





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