Should a married man be able to have female friends?

Alia

Yes a married man should be allowed to have friends. He may have just befriended this girl so that he could have a little more insight into what a woman thinks. For my part, I have many male friends who almost always get frustrated with me because I ask for their council when something may go awry in my relationship or I need random two cents.

Women try to control way too much out of insecurity. If he gives you a reason not to trust him then confront him, otherwise let it go.

You wouldn't be happy if you were micromanaged like that. If the reverse were true and this was your random Internet friend hat you chatted with sporadically, you would look at this differently and just see it as a way to pass the time for him. The chances that he would befriend a random middle aged male over the Internet are very very few.

sAnD GiRl!!

If he has nothing to hide he should share their conversations with you.

WildRockMan

Yes - he can have female friends.

No - he shouldn't be keeping them a secret.

Simple.

KingDavid

I do,,,but then again my wife is mature enough to handle that.

chevalrose

He should be able to have female friends, but he shouldn't be hiding them from you. If he isn't talking to you about them, it might raise some suspicion. If he starts to disappear at night, then I'd be worried. Until then, try to trust him.

Yes a married man should be able to have female friends.... However a female friend on the internet who he has never met... I can see how you would be suspicious.

NONAME

A married man should only have female friends WITH his wife. I call my wife's friends my friends too!

BUT to have a female friend that my wife does not know probably not a good idea. Unless it is a business associate then it should be a business relationship and NOT a friendship.

kristi.burkhart

I don;t like my man to have "girl" friends. He has proven in the past that they don't stay friends.

malkav99k

He should be able to but usually they should be friends from before the relasionship. Jealousy rears it ugly head on both sides of this topic(guy w/ female friend and girl w/ guy friend)

I think it should only be a problem if he doesn't want you to get to know her(it's kinda a red flag). If you become friends or are at least civil with her, you can get a better idea from the two of them wether it's just frienship or an attemp at something more.

pura_rosa

It may simply be an innocent friendship but if he did not tell you before or shields their conversations it may mean trouble, in my marrie we simply do not have single friends unless they are friends with both of us, it saves a lot of trouble! I would simply get me one of those programs that record everything he types and see for myself, if nothing is going on he will have earned your trust and if something is going on you can beat the crap out of him, either way you get rid of those painful doubts.

Brother Otter

Absolutely. The promise is to be faithful and keep it at home, not cut himself off from half the planet's population.

The thing is for him to keep stuff above board. No secrets. No hiding. If it involves him, it involves the relationship, and that makes it something you're interested in too.

â˜† luv â˜†

I just posted something like this........but any ways, I dont mind my hubby having friends, what I get pissed of at is that he kept it secret!!!

this other lady has left voice mails.....with love songs! I told him that she wants more tan just a friendship........

make him intruduce you guys, hell thats what I did, she hasant spoken to my hubby since......

johnnywestervelt

I guess he can have female friends. But, why is he keeping her a secret? That is what is not cool with me. I would ask him why he did not tell you. Chances are he is not going to sleep with her. He is just making a mistake by not trusting your feelings towards this. WOuld you be mad if he had this friend or not want him talking to another female. Sometimes guys talk to other women secretly because it fulfills some part of their mental being that they are ashamed of. Confront him nicely and find out what's going on. If you are uncomfortable with it, tell him. He loves you, right?

Jet

Most men are pigs.

Not me though.

~â™¥Truckers Wifeâ™¥~

that is weird, i mean if he had the friend before you got together then i would say no there is really nothing and they were friends. but he met her on the computer.... that isnt a good sign.. why would he need that!

dianna

Tell him that you are OK with it only if he allows you to read the stuff they write back and forth. It does not sound good to me, so be on the alert. If anything else seems to be a little off, he may be looking around.

hippie chick

i dont see a problem with it, if he is open and honest about her with you and you can trust him, then why not?? i'm sure you have male friends that you talk to don't you?

Army Wife

yes your husband can have female friends, just like you can have male friends. he should not be keeping them a secret though. you should try joining in on one of their conversations. if he gets really nervous or acts all weird then something might be up. try to trust him unless you have proof not to. you dont want to fight over nothing.

Ms Angel

Yes they can. I am a female and have more male friends than females and my bf has a lot a female friends as well. You do sound paranoid and the question to you is do you trust him. If you did, you wouldn't feel like this. You should discuss it with your husband and tell him exactly how you feel.

phorwanted

If he isn't taking her to lunch and she is a long distance will never meet in person cyber friend and he lets you see their chat...what's to worry? If he hides it and lies about it even he knows it is wrong.

weeyin

well yeah u shud let him ave female friends bt id b askin myself where he has met her if he has never spoken to her else where aprt from online,maybe he is just friends with her,he maybe didnt tell u that he was speaking to her incase you got the wrong idea bt regardless he shud never have kept it a secret you are his wife and you have the right to know who he is speaking to...good luck x

Nick A

Well the answer to your question is: It Depends...!!!

There are so many factors that this answer rides on that no one can possibly give you the correct answer for your situation.

I would start by looking at yourself. Get really honest about why you mistrust, your concerns, what you're making his actions mean vs what are the facts, your fears, why you dont want your husband to have female friends, etc, etc, etc...

Then when you are really clear where you are coming from, I would suggest sharing ALL that with your husband (every bit of it - especially the stuff you dont want to say), and then give him the opportunity to tell you why having this friend is important to him.

And from there the two of you can openly and in partnership choose how you want to handle this situation.

But the only real way to resolve this is for both of you to be really straight with yourselves and each other then talk about it in a manner that is supportive, understanding, and compassionate.

The above is a way of being that is missing in most marriages. Thats not saying anything is wrong, just this is what so.

Good luck

~I ~ o ~ v~

I think its ok if you both know her, but if he keeps it a secret. Then maybe you should question him. I personally don't think a husband should a female friend. They wouldn't have anything in common. Saying that she isn't married. I would just talk to him and see what he tells you.

Mill Creek

Katie,

What is his response when you ask him about it? Will he talk to her in front of you, and what is the subject of the discussion? What do they have in common, or what is the purpose of his constantly talking, as opposed to talking to you? Have you expressed your concern and dislike for his action?

Do you talk to other guys on line, or in person that he knows about?

Kellie

I think he should have let you know about his female friend...I mean I would be suspicious also...But let him know how you feel about it, and also ask him what he would do in your situation...I mean what if you had some male friend you talked to on the computer 2-3 times a day.?

â™¥ || Brown Eyed Girl || â™¥

WHOA! It's one thing to have a female friend that he knows from work or since before you and him met BUT to have a female chat friend and not tell you about it until you "investigated" would make me feel weird too. I don't think it's OK.

treeky

NO MARRIED MAN SHOULD HAVE A FEMALE FREIND IF HE DOES YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT IT AND ALL OF YALL NEED TO BE FRIEND NOT JUST HI MAND HER IT MAKES IT LOOK LIKE HE HIDING SOMETHING FROM YOU

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