Upset because my Dad doesn't tell me I am pretty anymore?

Cola

I think the timing of this with puberty is not a coincidence.

I imagine he might feel a bit uncomfortable cuddling you or complimenting your looks now that you are more and more resembling a grown woman. My daughter is 2 and I know that some of the things we do (cuddling and such) would be pretty weird to do with a woman as opposed to a baby. So maybe it's just that. (Or, maybe he's okay with it but someone else got the wrong idea or thought it was improper and talked to him.)

I would just ask him about it.. if you can communicate that well with your dad, it would be a good idea. I bet he still thinks you are pretty and would still love to hold you, but is holding back.

NeoNerd

He's just uncomfortable - you're developing into a woman, to be frank, and it could seem strange form a father to compliment his daughter on looks at your age.

Hosea L

he still thinks your pretty. He is your dad, and he will always love you

Happy-2

I am a father of a 16 year old, and I'd like to propose a trade with your father! A couple of years ago, my daughter stopped wanting me to cuddle her, to touch her, to kiss her cheek when I got home from work. This really hurt my feelings. Now, it's like we live together, but I miss her, if you can understand that. She treats me like a big, old object of disgust. So, I envy your father!

All I can tell you is the the onset of adolescence makes people weird sometimes, and it's not always the person you expect. Some men start feeling scared that people might think they're perverts if they tell their daughters they're pretty or tell them they're attractive. Personally, I think that's silly, and I would never stop telling mine I think she's beautiful, even though she doesn't seem to want to hear it from me.

Justagirl

When we grow up our Daddy's start seeing us less as "their little girl" and more as an individual. Maybe he doesn't know you miss hearing it. Why not talk to him about it?

bill l

just talk to him,maybe he has gone through a change.If i had a daughter that i was like that with,then i stopped,I would hope she would talk to me about it because i surely wouldn't ever do anything to hurt my daughter.Good luck to you and i'm sure in his heart he loves you the same way as he did when he did let you know how much he loved you.

Maxwell

When you reach a certain age, and your dad realizes you are a woman, it gets creepy if he is always talking about how pretty you are. He probably doesn't want to feel like some dirty incestuous father.

You can always ask him if he still thinks you are pretty. When he tells you Yes, of course, just remember that comment and leave the subject alone.

crimsonwlf22

Well, you don't need him to tell you your pretty. But since you're part of that species called Homo Sapein, I suppose you think you need him to tell you you're pretty.

Anyway, have you tried asking him why? He might start saying that you're pretty if you ask him.

Also, it could be that your relationship has somehow become sort of distant with him since you were thirteen. My relationship with my mom has become distant since I grew up, but there is something you can try if your relationship has gotten that way. Bring up personal things that you want his opinion on.

If your relationship isn't distant, than maybe you shouldn't worry about it. If you keep dwelling on this problem, it could lead to an obsession.

I hope you find your answer.

Edgar Allen Shmoe

FIrst its oedipal, and that refers to a male that wants to sleep with his mother. Not a father and his daughter.

Just ask him why he doesn't say it. His reasons for not saying it are not what you think they are. Its up to him to decide if and when he tells you why, but if you let him know, I bet he will start again. Its not because you are not pretty.

K2K

Your just getting older and your dad is realizing that. What was appropriate for you as a child isnt so appropriate anymore. Your dad realizes this. On the other hand, i think your dad might also have a hard time with knowing how to compliment his baby girl now or show her that affection he once did. Try maturly helping him out. Parents need help & suggestions from thier children just as much as the child needs help form the parent.

Loubzz x

I think the best way to resolve this situation, is to talk to him about how you feel.
If you still feel all that uncomfortable, maybe you could bring it up in conversations, such as, maybe looking at yourself in the mirror one day infront of your dad, and just say...'heyy, do you think im pretty??' or maybe just pop it up in a conversation....Lilly allen's really pretty dont you think?..**yhh..** Do you think i could be like her one day?? Do you think im pretty enough??....
Or maybe tell him, such as....dad, your really handsome! maybe hell giv you some compliments too!!
(Sorry it was long btw!!)
Hope this helped!!
Good Luck!!
xxxxxxx

Nena

put yourself in his shoes. It must be weird or different for him to see his little girl all grown up. He might even feel uncomfortable with cuddling with you because you're not a baby anymore..

Rhoady

He's probably just uncomfortable, don't worry :) But it's best to talk to him about the subject then us. Nobody knows or could resolve this situation better then him.

Good luck.

Sarah

Okay c'mon.
I honestly doubt she's got a 'crush' on her daddy..i mean who out there would be pissed if daddy stopped saying he loved you??
i would be extremely miffed if my dad stopped calling me pretty and saying i was the best person in the world.
just tell him you love him and want to make sure he still loves you too.
thatll get him to talk to you like that again.
best of luck!

hellobeautiful.

ur older.. hes trying to make u not feel like a baby anymore just talk to him about it

suzanne

He obviously feels it is not proper or correct to be hugging you anymore as this could be misconstrued.
I feel he has your best interests at heart-but if you feel he is being distant and cold toward you-then talk to him about how you feel.!

arlanymor

Your dad is behaving the best way possible.You are a young woman and if he showed you too much affection then it could be interpreted wrongly by some outsiders who dont understand.There is so much in the press about abuse that it put someone like your dad in a very awkward position.You know he loves you and that,s what counts

Smiley

he thinks you're grown up probably and doesn't want to embarrass you and not everyone can be beautiful there does need to be a balance. if your so desperate ask for a hug! for godsake some people can be so stupid these days and never use common sense!

leser

does oedipus complex ring a bell? lol

Beckie

I'm sorry you feel this way about yourself... and I'm not being horrible, but most teenage girls go through it, you sound to me like you have low self esteem...
You dad more than likely stopped cuddling you so much and telling you that you're beautiful at 13 because you were beginning to change, and he felt awkward with you hitting puberty (trust me, dad's find this stupidly awkward with teenage girls!)... but that doesn't mean that he thinks you're not so pretty! and by no means will he think of you as a dissapointment because of the way you look!
When he mentions Lily Allen you shouldn't feel jealous... she is a beautiful girl, however she is also make-uped and air brushed to the eyeballs! No wonder she always looks so good! (As well, the way in which he's thinking she's pretty, shouldn't be the way a father is thinking about his daughter!)
I doubt there is any reason why your dad doesn't tell you that you're going to be a heart breaker... he more than likely thought you'd be embarraresed or grown out of it! He's your dad, he's not doing it to make you feel bad, so you shouldn't feel like this!
If I'm being honest, the reason what your dad thinks you look like affects you so much is because you want someone to tell you that you are beautiful, you want attention. I'm sure he gives you attention in other ways, but it's unfair to blame your dad for your insecurities/need for attention, because he did not form these... you did.
Please realise that your dad will love you regardless of what you look like (I was in an accident which left me with a lot of facial scarring, and my dad doesn't treat me any differently, and is certainly not dissapointed in me because I have scars!) .. and understand that you are beautiful, especially to your family!
Hope this helps.
Beckie x

Strawberry Lumps

1. Your dad still loves you and think your pretty. He might just think because your a teen now you won't need him as much and is giving you some space. Try talking 2 him about it and explain that it's hurting. 2. Don't believe that your ugly and that you're a disappointment. It will only make you feel worse. Hope this helps :D x

Tricia G

Your dad doesn't know that you miss hearing those things from him. Tell him. And tell him you need to hear sometimes how proud he is of you.

Maybe he stopped doing these things because you pitched a fit and said "DON'T SAY THIS TO ME" when you were 13 and he is respecting your wishes. When my step daughters hit about 14 or so, they did not want their dad to touch them at all or to compliment them. They thought it was creepy and inappropriate. They recoiled at his touch and sternly told him "DON'T TOUCH ME!!!". Well...the girls must have missed it because once each of them hit 17 or so, every one of them would lay on the couch with her head next to their dad's lap...so he could rub their scalp...like he did when they were little girls. And if the daughter's head is not near my husband's lap, then their feet are in his lap...demanding a foot massage.

It was funny because I would see the daughter at 15 or 16 refusing any bodily contact with their dad. Then when each hit around 16 1/2, I would see them looking wistfully as she watched her sister get her feet, shoulders or scalp massaged by dad. And then a few months later, a foot would be strategically placed near dad with the hopes that he would massage it. He would....although sometimes I would have to tell him "rub Daughter's feet." LOL. And now that they are older and 2 are out on their own, they still come over to visit...and offer their scalp, shoulders or feet to their dad to massage.

And it is not creepy. It is very sweet.

Mainmaster

I think you have grown to much into your dad. He sees that you are growing up and probably feels weird to tell you how beautiful you are. What you need to do is find a boyfriend, a guy that will tell you how beautiful you are and cuddle with you. A guy you can understand and spend time with.

Skye

Another girl with daddy issues. wowzer.
I'd say don't mention it, your growing up. At a certain age, a lot of cuddling and complements from a parent can become a little creepy to other people.
But I also understand you don't want to lose the bond between you and your father, hang out with him. Go for walks, talk to him.
And don't get jealous. Also creepy

amyhpete

They mean an Electra complex. Go here and see if it might apply to you:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electra_complex

If not, then I would initiate affection, telling your dad you've had a hard day and need a hug, etc. Perhaps he will get back to his affectionate self upon realizing it's harmless.

As we grow up our dads do get uncomfortable and might need some help navigating what's ok and what's not as far as affection.

Gwynne P

You should ask him why he's not doing it anymore.

Sammyxxo

Of course he knows your pretty! He's your dad for goodness sake!
Just ask him about it, he probably thinks you would be embarrassed and whatnot. My parents still call me dumb nicknames, and im 13, in front of the friends. I don't really care anymore, because its just their way of showing that they love, and care about you!

my dad has never ever told me I was pretty...he doesn't show us any affection and we live together...we have never even said I love you to eachother or ever even hugged and I'm his only girl...

Theres people who have it worse than you...

Amber

The best thing to do is talk to him about it. I know you feel like you aren't getting the love you want, you just have to get him to communicate with you about it.

Its not like he doesn't think those things anymore, he probably thought you were tired of hearing him say those things and felt he was annying or bothering you with that.

I'm sure he still feels that way.

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