Was I wrong?

â™¥ 2 Miscarriages â™¥

you absolutely should have told your husband. It's his household too! He has just as much say as what goes on in the house as you do.

linda h

I don't see anything wrong with you son's friend staying over. I think your husband over reacted. You are adult. You made a competent decision.

Your husband needs to lighten up.

vixenfay

You where not out of line.

Your sons friend wanted to spend the night you where the adult in the house and made the descision.

By saying that things "happen" when you have a 3 year old in the house is stating that your son and yourself are a bad judge of character. Would your son seriously have a friend that would do horrible things to his sister?

milk_and_oreo_4life

no i dont think you were wrong.....u have as much authority over your son as he does. I dont think that you should have to check with each other before you do things. As far as you having a little girl. What does that matter...besides the boys being a little noisy and maybe keeping her awake then i dont think anything else or"crap" would happen. So no you werent wrong at all in my opinion.

just me #1

well I do see his point, but it seems he may be over reacting a little bit.

brent0331

sounds like he has some issues.

teresathegreat

You weren't wrong, your husband was just being whiny because he had had a long hard day and this seemed like extra responsibility. But try to be a little more sympathetic to his long days and recognize the real source of his crankiness.

anezat83

I think your husband over-reacted. A LOT! Do you have to ask permission to do anything that relates to your children?
However, I could see his point of view IF: he had to get up super-early in the morning for work and they boys are super-noisy and kept him up. If that is the case, just don't let your son have friends over throughout the week: just on weekends!

Moondog

Sounds like a bit of an overreaction but I can understand his point. I think if you do have a strange kid staying in your house it is probably a good idea to have the little girl sleep with you.

roscoe7799

I think your husband is a little over the top on this. There was nothing wrong with inviting your son's friend to spend the night.

Ronin

So your husband thinks your sons friend will molest the 3yr old? I don't get it. Your husband sounds like a nut case.

sassywv

Your husband has a problem, unless you have left out an issue with the 14 year old. Unless he had plans that had to be changed due to a guest staying overnite why would he get so upset and why does the 3 year old have to sleep with you two? He is going to ruin the 14 year olds self-esteem with this type of behaviour

MYAB

No I don't think you are wrong. I wouldn't have thought that either does this boy have issues where your husband would think this. 14yr old boy and 3 year old girls usually don't play together. I would be more concerned if your daughter was 10 or 12. Is your daughters room far from yours and close to the boys where if he was a child molester he would be able to do something to your daughter?
Also if he was home and said yes too would your daughter have slept with you still?
Is it because your husband never seen this kid before?
I'm not getting the reason he is tripping either!!!
Men are controlling as* holes and this is just another thing you have to ask him first before you make a decision on your own.

mrsknowitall

I think he was just overreacting.
Maybe he should stop watching so much tv.
Yeah don't get me wrong stuff does happen but for God sakes why do people always live in fear.

ronidl76

Wow. Talk about being overprotective with his kids, which I can appreciate, but if your husband doesn't trust your son's friends, he needs to say that, and not assume the boy will try anything. I don't think you were wrong in letting him spend the night, but it is something you and your husband need to agree on.

mshavik

Yes, you should always consult your husband first. His opinion matters too as your decisions affect his children and his home.

Kim

I can see his point, you should have let him know, but i think he is over reacting a bit as well. If he is working, you are home to make the decisions, then go with your gut. Why if you let your son have a sleep over cant your daughter sleep in her own bed? Does she have her own room? That part i dont understand

Candi Bliss

Yes, you should have let him know. However if you are watching what they do, I don't see why he made such a big deal about that. Does this boy have a bad rep?

poodle mom

"crap" does happen, but your son should not be "sheltered" from having friends over...what is your husband gonna do when the daughter starts school? i can understand being protective, but not at another childs expense

Dakota

wow.. that is a little over the top as a response. Sure you should always be cautious but wow. You both need to have a heart to heart assuming you can.

debbie2243

Respect that your husband takes his responsibility seriously. He was a young boy once and might have remembered his youth . Puberty is a weird time for boys. They have this new thing happening to their bodies and don't really know what to do about it.
Stuff does happen. Many young girls get molested and it ruins their whole lives.

Your son can go spend the night out but always talk over what goes on in your house with the hubby.

My sister in law used to give huge get togethers and everyone would sleep over....she would throw everyone on the floor of the den. I was alarmed but no one would listen to me...they were all drunk...she put drunk men right next to her young grand daughters...and teen boys right next to teen girls....Needless to say I gave up my room for the girls and the guys got the den...and I sat awake in the recliner guarding my grandsons throughout the night.

My brother divorced her ignorant butt

sci

Crap doesn't just happen. Do you know the guest kid? His parents? Everything OK with him and them?

What, the boys are in the 3 year olds bedroom? I hardly think so.

He needs to lighten up and I find it hard to believe this is the first overnite guest of your son.

My gosh I routinely have 7-10 boys overnite on any given Fri/Sat nite.

I think hubby has some deep issues

Old Guy

sunbun

so in the future call him at work and give him a heads up---problem solved...maybe he didn't like someone spending the night when he had to get up and go to work the next day

The It Girl âˆ†â˜»ä¹

Communication is the key to every relationship. He is entitled to know what is going on.
It isn't the end of the world. Don't worry.
In the future, make him part of the decision process and it will make you both better parents and partners.

Very Honest

You weren't wrong, but neither was he.

I think what he said was sort of cute.. He's worried about his little girl. That's a real father. I have to say, it's ridiculous at 3 years old and I can't imagine what he will be like when she's 16, but if it makes him that uncomfortable, try to understand.

pita p

hard to say..as long as his friend ain't one of those sickos.

alexd

Your husband has a right to be protective over his kids; even if it means for you to get permission from your husband. I think it is awesome he's taking authority of his family, most husbands don't have that kind of consideration until something tragic happens. And it is a fact that little girls get perpetrated on by teenager boys and family members usually. Stand by your man when he's taking authority over his home but don't be afraid of asking why he's making that specific choice for your family. You are mother and wife, so don't be afraid to express yourself!

Sir Richard

Nobody is right or wrong. If you want to prove who is right or wrong, you have the WRONG idea.

First question: does your husband know the boy b4? Most fathers know who their children hang out with and therefore have an idea whether these friends are "good" or "bad". This part you didn't elaborate. If that is a stranger, you unwisely exposed your family to danger -- whether it was petty theft or whatever horrible with his daughter.

Second question: with emails and voicemails, you have no excuse not to alert him. YOu should know his style --- he wanted to be informed. You had the means to do so and you didn't.

Men feel protective of his household. Women want their children to have fun. My 11 yr old son has his friends around all the time. But he also leaves his wallet around (about $60 in it). He would never think his friends would steal from him. But he doesn't have a clear account of how much money he really has either. So I told him to not have money around his room and not wait for misunderstanding to happen.

begeeman13

well, while you were within your rights as a parent to grant your son permission to do something, it probably was not the smartest thing to do it without mentioning it to the father. no one likes to come home to surprises, and in fact, you don't have to ask him for permission, either. all you would need to do is call him at work and say, i know you're busy, but i gave so-and-so permission to have a sleepover tonight. you could then put his concerns at ease, saying that the two boys will be together, and the 3 year old will be with you, and it would be perfectly fine. he might still be uncomfortable at first, but that's better than surprising him as soon as he gets home. good luck!

Shavon's Wedding Silks

You should have told him. He is right.

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