What can i do in this situation. My wife is completely disrespecting me. She says it's my fault.?

Yoda

Confused? Being screwed would be a better name for what is happening to you. I bet you jumped the gun and got married along with thousands of other people on 7/7/7 because she thought it was cool or would be a good luck thing. Now you are finding out the luck has no place in a marriage. You should only get married and make babies with someone you really know and understand and that in order for that to happen you need to first understand yourself. You screwed up and now she is definetly having an affair. Do not be confused about that. SHe wants her freedom back to now go after something new she thinks she wants. She was to immature to get married and like I said I would bet she rushed you.

Save what is left of your life and get out. Save your self respect and your ability to trust another person and get out.

You have already lost her, and I don't think you lost much.

Yoda out

teeman824

She has already left you.
Call a law er

you love her?
cuz i can honestly say that you can't possibly love yourself, cuz if you did, you wouldn't accept what your wife is doing.
how can you love anyone or anything when you have no love for yourself?
she has no respect for you.
maybe because you have no respect for yourself.

grow some self esteem and dump the little wife.

lisalisa

It is over looks like you both got all caught up in the 7/7/7 marraige thing.
Move on it is a matter of time before she is moving out.
Any women who stays out in bars is cheating

is life really hell in Hell?

Sounds like you married a child instead of a woman. Get it annulled if you can...

â™£MÇfiÇ Girlâ™£

First you married the wrong person. She thinks she can control you. I think she is mean and a bit of a psycho. You should have decided before itself what you were getting yourself into. Try some help or if not walk out. Swinger? My what woman have you picked up??

Mama Moose

You got issues, its time to talk to a counsler...... Your wife is heading for an affair or has already started one, Marriage is not easy and take lots of work and also 2 people willing to work things out. My guess is you guys were having trouble before but the high you were experiencing wasn't letting you see the who picture.

Mrs. House

Wow...she is already cheating on you with this guy, and she's not making any effort to hide it! She's met this guy, got mad because you had a problem with it, and is now doing whatever the heck she wants with him. You sound like a good guy, and you don't deserve that. I would refuse to take her back. Let the cop have her, and give her some divorce papers. You even have lots of proof she's probably cheating. Good luck.

Yeppers!

Shes a bad apple!

Tommy

Seems obvious that she is into this other guy. If she is really into swinging then maybe this is something you would like as well. If not, then get out now. She is definitely messing around.

charlesjerrell

quit, sounds like she didnt really want to be married in the first place

wallhugger

shes hiding somthing...thats what id think anyway,mayby shes not,im just saying leave it or love it...theres no working this out obviously

ranger33

I think she may be cheating on you with the cop friend. Sorry. A similar thing happened to me and my former wife. I think you should go out with your friends and stay out all night and come home when ever you want to. By the way if you think she is staying at a friends house you might want to think again. (maybe at that guys house would probably be right.)

Rebecca W

THis goes far beyond disrespect. At 6 months into the marriage you should still be in your "honeymoon" phase. Instead she is being an absolute skank, cheating on you, treating you like dirt. Just how long do you think your love will survive?

Leave now! Cut your losses before you have kids. Oh and by the way, she is not afraid of confrontation, she is being deliberately aggressive and taking the offense in order to make this seem like your fault. It isn't!

I don't care what your faults are, nobody is perfect. That has no bearing on her dishonest, disloyal, and reprehensible behavior. Sorry you got saddled with such a *itch.

MamaBear

Insist on counseling - you are her husband, you have that right. Drag her if you have to. This is not a normal situation. Tell her it's either counseling or divorce.

And you might want to think about hiring a private investigator, anyway . . . you might need his testimony in divorce court. Changing her myspace id to "swinger" and staying out until 3 am with "friends" is a bad sign for a newlywed.

Cherri

This is a tough one. It sounds like she had fell out of love with you. Try to hang in their and work it out since you are still in love with her. Wish you the best. :)

Liz27

it almost seems to me that she is unsure of herself. i think it is totally wrong for her to do this to you. i have been married for 11 years, but i still would not do this to my husband. you should really try to tell her how you really feel. if she can not except how you feel then maybe that should get you to thinking good luck

pinky

What is it you love? I can't see what you are getting from this relationship/marriage. She is showing disrespect to you, to marriage and to herself.
Something has to change. You have no trust left.
Just what are your negatives?

Dood

She doesn't want to be in a committed relationship with you. She may have acted like everything was normal a couple weeks ago, but the truth is that you were fooled. She deceived you. She agreed to a relationship that she does not have the willpower or desire to seriously commit to. Sorry it happened, but that's just how people are sometimes (both men and women). She changed, and there's not much you can do about it. Don't bother trying to win her back. She may act like that's what she wants, but it's not. That's just an excuse she uses to go do what she wants. And you know what she wants: to screw around with other guys. Don't let her walk allover you like that. Never let any woman do that to you. Just go ahead and leave her. Maybe she'll grow up a bit, but it won't be over night. She still has some screwing around to get out of her system before she will be ready for the kind of relationship you desire. Let her go, and maybe someday she will come back and you will be willing to take her back... maybe.

the_morris_bears

Ok women who have a fear of confrontation often take an angry road. This sounds very similar does it not. Look at this point give a week's worth of space and tell her how much you love her and need her in your life. Make sure she knows you lover her and that she means more to you than anything. Giving up on a marriage is like saying I'm not taking that brand new car because I'm affraid of getting a bug on the windsheild. Marriages are not easy they are worked at each day even if it as simple as telling the spouse that you love waking up next to them each morning. Once the week has past ask her if you can talk to her about something you need her help with....women love to fix problems and feel needed just like men! Once you have a calm enviornment and have her there talk to her about what's bothering you....don't attack her by saying things like "when you do this I feel like this" instead us things like "when I see this happen I feel like this" This way you aren't attacking her.
Good Luck,
Momma_Bear

organbuilder272

You don't have to have confrontation. You can calmly talk about it. Your gesture about controlling who she sees and such was very damaging. Likely she is doing this to defy you and show that you have no control.

You might show disintrest and suggest that if she really likes this cop better than you just be honest and suggest that you have a separation prior to divorce.

You cannot control another person. Slavery went out in 1865. She is a person and she does have a right, married or not, to recreation with friends. Better you be a part of it that put yourself outside the circle.

Suggest you go with her and have a nice night out. You have to look at the situation before and after and carefully think about what went wrong and when. This think about why.

When you make ultimatums you are drawing a line and demanding a yes or no compliance with the terms of the confroontation. Inevitably this will bring defiance and confrontation. She is testing your stamina and resolve. She may be signaling for trust and companionship.

Youa re doing something that is driving her to this other guy - Change course, matey, your ship is heading for the rocks.

Do not confront. Talk smooth, ask her to tell you what is going wrong. Make no promises because your actions will speak louder than words.

You have to get to the root cause of this trouble and smooth it out quickly because the longer it goes the more daring she will become and the less chance for recovery.

You might even talk to the guy and see what he thinks about the situation but you MUST NOT, get angry or demanding. Listen when he talks, Listen carefully. He may give you a clue that will save your marriage.

This is an emotional situation but the worst thing that can happen is to get tempers going, make accusations about who did what and why and say hurtful things that will only make matters worse. Be cool, telly our wofe that you likely have hurt her and want to make things right. then let he do the talking. No matter what she does - do nothing, say nothing that will cause anger of accusations. Keep your cool. Above all do not make demands. It is this that has driven her away.

Quasimodo

You know precisely what's going on and you know exactly where this is going to go.

Do you need to be taken by the hand and walked through this?

free_angel

I would just pack my **** and leave.

Jazz

yikes, that sounds very very bad. If you tried to control things like that from the get, I can see how that pushed her away. Nobody likes to be treated and controlled like an animal.
But, if you only started to look into your suspicions and found evidence, then that's another thing.
No matter how many times my husband has cheated on me, or done whatever to me. I would never stay out late. There has been a handful of times where he goes and plays magic and I hang with my sister and my mom until about 1 am or so. But I NEVER ever would go out without being in agreement first. Neither one of us will go out unless the other says OK. And I CERTAINLY would never find myself hanging out with a single guy!!! As a married person you have boundaries!!!
If she is not willing to change, you need to save your sanity and move on. Who wants to be a daddy to their wife? Checking email phone numbers...come on. I did that for a long while and gave up. Too emotionally draining. Plus, if they are that way, you will just keep finding things and more and more...
Decide to ignore, or decide to have better...

arkiegirl

Sorry, but it sounds like she's already got one foot out the door. She obviously doesn't care about you or your marriage. She's spending way too much time with that "friend" of hers. I could be wrong (though I doubt it), but I think it's probably safe to assume that they are already in a relationship. She wouldn't be reacting the way she is, if there wasn't more to it.. It's probably been going on for a lot longer than you think.

She's acting like a disrespectful tramp. I'm sorry.. I know she's your wife and you love her.. but I think it's pretty obvious that she's up to no good. Sounds to me, like she was nowhere near ready to get married.. and she's realizing that now. She needs to just own up to that, and leave.. cause it's not like she's really there anyways. She's got other things on her mind, and is trying to live out some fantasy or something.

She sounds like trash to me.. I think you'd be better off without her.

i love anne

at least you dont know if shes having an affair.my wife is so count your self lucky.

milknem

Most people that do this don't realize what they have until it is gone. She is never going to admit that she is doing something wrong. You should start talking to other women to turn the shoe on the other foot. Don't be her fool.

KingDavid

Dude!!!!! "She has been going out every night, staying out till 3:00 am or staying the night at friends. "
Are you kidding me? Why are you allowing this type of behavior? You guys are husband and wife now...It sounds to me she still wants to be single "Living La Vida LOca"..Forget this,,,Put some boundaries and if she can't meet them face up to the fact that your marriage is heading for failure!

pitchingcoach

To a degree it is your fault. You don't have the right to tell her who she can go out with or who her friends are. That's a death wish pal. On the other hand, she's obviously cheating. She has no moral right to do that either. I'd get out but then reexamine your role in a relationship. You don't own her.

sunflowergal

i'm sorry to say, but she is really disrespecting you, and doesn't really love you. You guys should still be the cute little newlywed couple, instead of this couple that is on the road to splitsville... I know you love her, but one person cannot make it work. Why don't you keep continuing to try, but know that reality might be you guys splitting. Then, you will have had a clear concious as to trying everything you can. If she's got the hots for this cop, she'll dig herself a hole that she can't get out of....in the meantime, make notes and document things, so if it does come to divorce, you've got your ducks in a row, and can prove her doings.

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