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Out dated. |
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Sali90
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Not good, i escaped an arranged marriage and have my freedom, but i lost my family over it!
Some marriages work, where the people involved get to choose, but forced marriages are a recipe for disaster, i think! |
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shauna
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studies have shown over and over again that arranged marriages are more successful and the couples are more satisfied than marriages of love. the satisfaction and success of the marriage is rated by the couples themselves (arranged and non-arranged), so it isn't a researcher going in and labeling how happy they seem.
the reason for arranged marriages being more successful and happy? arranged marriages are selected based on the compatibility of the couple, not just the passion/chemistry, which we all know fades and changes over time. arranged marriages focus on these shared qualities among the two people: culture, religion, beliefs, values, families types, etc. these are all important factors that ALL engaged people SHOULD consider before getting married, but people marrying for romance often neglect this and assume that love will make their marriage last. however, once they realize that they have different views on child-rearing and discipline and other values, those differences drive a wedge btwn the couple resulting in divorce. also people in a romantic marriage, often have unrealistic expectations about marriage which leads to disappointment and unhappiness when those expectations aren't met. the divorce rate is much lower among arranged marriages as well. just think about how many people in this chat alone post about having abusive bf/gf or drug addicted bf/gf that they LOVE and still plan to marry.
check out for more info: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arranged_marriage
also, i am a sociology student conducting an anonymous study on relationships. you can check it out at: http://geocities.com/sbiv37/marr |
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Sexy-baby
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They should be banned!!! pushing two people together to marry and start a family is wrong, people should be free to marry the person they love not the person their parents choose due to their religion/culture |
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Gus
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I believe that arranged marriages are the best for the strong family. Simply because both parties are aware of all advantages of such. Divorce here is very rare and the offsprings do have both parents, financial and family security. This is something you can not say about "modern" marriages, more often than not ending quickly as "single mum" families. |
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Jenny O
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I do not agree with them, I feel it is wrong to force some one to spend their whole life with someone if they dont love them. |
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Loris Ann
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Ridiculous |
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Alli
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Well they aren't really accepted in my culture. If my parents said they were going to give someone a cow and I would have to marry them-- I'd laugh A LOT! It seems out dated and scary. Sure my parents would probably do their best to find someone good for me, but around here women have the right to choose for themselves! I like it that way.
In response to the "last longer than love marriages," there is a widespread theory that is because you would be because divorce is not an option in cultures where they have arranged marriages. |
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Maria
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Its ridiculous. Everyone has their own minds. I would not like it nor would I ever do that to a child of mine |
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natalie
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I think it's absolutely barbaric |
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HMMMM
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I think it is awful. No one should have to go through that. I think everyone should get to choose on their own who they want to spend the rest of their lives with. |
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Mr. Taco
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Generally speaking I oppose them, but statistically, arranged marriages are equally successful, if not MORE successful than other marriages. The truth is that we romanticize love to the point where it is impractical. Real love, the kind that lasts forever, takes work and effort, and that is something that you can do in an arranged marriage just as easily as in another marriage. Being that the love has to be developed and grown and created and nurtured from the beginning, it is common that an arranged marriage will actually turn out to be quite a happy one. Here is the key, though: the two people in question must be WILLING to get involved in an arranged marriage. I oppose forced arranged marriages vehemently. If it is their choice, then they will be just as likely to be successful as anyone else. This is the case in many different cultures. I do not think that arranged marriages are for me, and they certainly do not play a big part in American culture, but considering our divorce rates, I hardly think we can criticize. |
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nethnee
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everybody should be free to choose their own life partner. it must be very scary marrying someone you dont even know |
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Lydia_j82
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I don't agree with them at all. Marriage is all about love and wanting to be with the one you love for the rest of your life. I have resently just got engaged myself and proud and very pleased with the man i've said Yes to. I can't imagen marrying someone that I didn't know or even love. Sorry if it sounds harsh, thats just my view. |
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Ardelia
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It is simply a business agreement between families which can make the couple's life a nightmare. |
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Poly M
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very stupid. if is not love between them then why should they marrie each other? |
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Rach
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it depends if it really is an arranged marriage or a forced marriage. My boyfriend was engaged in a forced marriage with his cousin who he didn't even like. He had to fight to get out and he did, but with severe reprecussions from his family.
Arranged marriage is okay, AS LONG AS BOTH PARTIES ARE HAPPY. The good thing about arranged marriage is that usually, both partners have low expectations and are much more willing to compromise and work around each other. In a successful arranged marriage, a couple will usually fall in love after a time, as was intended.
As far as arranged marriages being better than love marriages? I don't know. It's true that arranged marriage takes away the Disney gossamer of romantic expectation that love marriage has, and often causes it to fail. But I don't think I'd pick an arranged marriage, unless it was with my boyfriend. |
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paradise
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im ok with arrange dmarriages as long as the adults are consenting!!
sometimes ppl confuse arranged marriages with forced marriages and trus me its not the same!! |
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Private P
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Idiotic |
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Wendy B
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I've never had one or known anyone who has, so my opinion is probably uneducated, but this is what I think.
Parents usually only want the best for their kids. They are wiser, more mature, and have the long term in mind. I would have been thrilled to avoid the dating scene...uck! Had my parents come to me and told me who i was to marry, I would have been relieved and happy that I could just go forth with life. The dating years were definitly the worst. Being married is wonderful. |
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Keepin it Real
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bull sh it! |
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Pandora
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NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! Bad uh-uh. |
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Gem*
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I don't think they are right personally. |
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Rosy
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They should absolutely ban this.
loads of killings happens cuz of this if the person goes against it.
i know alot of people who is not happy in the relationship and also marry because to please the parents WTF?!
its not even a religion thing. its a really stupid culture.
the divorse rate may be low in arranged marriage only because they too scared to admit to family they want to break up and they not happy.
family doesnt care if they happy or not.
talking from experience. been to hell and back
and no they dont work out better than love marrige.
lot of arranged marriage have been broken up.
And some marry because to bring someone over to uk. thats not right. thats sick |
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Stephanie S
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I dont agree with them! If you listen to the meaning of marriage during the ceremony you can hear the marriage means love! If you dont love you dont get married! its sin! |
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sarah
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I think that arranged marriages are the dumbest idea ever. I am glad that I am from a culture where my parents let me be what I wanted, not what they forced me to be. That is wrong, marriage should be about love not misery and being forced. |
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Dolly
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I wouldn't have one but apparently the statistics show that more stick it out than "normal" marraiges these days..........x |
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Scampi
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As an indian myself, i am not against the idea of arranged marriages, but please remember that like someone mentioned arranged marriages are different from forced marriages. Arranged marriages are like blind dates and it is taken from there and only ever go ahead if both parties consent otherwise it's back to the drawing board.
My parents had an arranged marriage, they didn't meet until their wedding day and only saw pictures of each other beforehand, they have now been married for over 30 years and are in love. My cousins have also gone down the same road with happy endings.
I personally did not have an arranged marriage - not because i didn't want to but because i met my boyfriend at uni and wanted to be with him, i also suffered repercussions from my family for this choice but everything's ok now.
Arranged marriages in my opinion do work better than love marriages as many of those who enter an arranged marriage do not have these high expectations of love and romanticism and so can grow to love their partner.
I agree with the person who said within arranged marriages compatibility is taken into consideration rather than love. This is always the case. I know many people my age (25) who have entered into arranged marriages and are very happy. I think it all depends on your mindset, if you want to make your marriage work than it will, there are many indians today who will happily tell you truthfully that they are very happy with their lives after entering an arranged marriage.
Like all marriages, arranged marriages do not always work out but then that doesn't mean that they are wrong. Forced marriages are wrong but not arranged marriages. |
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kirsty b
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they arent for everyone and sometimes they can be a disaster as the family dont know the bride/groom but in some instances the couple can grow to love each other and have a very happy marriage, i am getting married next year but it is not an arranged. |
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Miss Marigold
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I think there are pros and cons for this question.
The pro being that by marrying a stranger you both pull together to make it work and don't expect anything. So there are not that many arguments and disputes.
The con being that you don't love them and have to see that in time if you can. You are the only one who can decide what is right for you! |
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bubbly
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it s scarring, how can u give urself to a man u dont know..huhh! |
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