When is a good time to move on from a divorce if the other person was having an affair?

susie12345

Wow - this is a tough situation. Not only did he cheat but with the ex wife. So it's likely you are torturing yourself wondering what she had that you did not. I know that I can get jealous of my husband's ex. At even the slightest comment he makes. I can't even imagine how I would feel if he had an affair with her.

Your self esteem is demolished at this point. I agree with the other answer you got that this was not your fault. If it makes you feel better, your husband is a total disrespectful, mean creep. And I am being nice.

You need to do something to feel better about yourself. You can't sit around and wonder what happened and feel sad. You could take a trip somewhere you've never been.

Get a new hairdo, botox or breast implants. Not that you NEED them. Take a yoga or judo class. Anything that will pick you up. How about some cute outfits for the first next date.

Good luck. And don't regret being a faithful person. You will bounce back.

TQH

As soon as you can. It's going to take time, start planning too leave immediately. It may not ever seem like a good time but start anyway, the sooner you start the less time It will take to get over him.
I've been there.

free_angel

All that will come to you the very second you realize and can admit your ex is the scum of the earth and you're better off without him.

Christina6473

I am not sure. I am going through the same thing and it happened to me on March 6th. That was the day he left and I found out he had a girlfriend 2 weeks later that he was in contact with since February. The pain is still real and I still am upset everyday. The only thing that makes me feel better is what some wrote me, that God gave me signs my whole marriage that either I didn't want to see or ignored. Finally God said I was not listening so he yanked him out of my life. It still hurts but I am starting to see the light . . .Best of Luck!!

in a few months

freebutnotsoeasy

Only time can heal this rotten feeling you're experiencing. Hold your head high and don't (whatever you do) blame yourself. Believe you are as good and worthy as anyone else out there. It's his loss and your gain to be rid of someone like that. You probably still love him and when you lose someone you love your body can sometimes treat it like a mourning over a death. Keep up with your friends and family and say 'to hell with him.....I'm more deserving than that'. Been there done that!!

Katie M

It took me about 2 years to get over the betrayal. Just realize there ARE honest, faithful men out there. They'll find you when you're not really looking.

Jenn L

It is very, very hard to get over something like this, especially when you are a really loyal person. When you are a faithful person, and someone betrays you it hurts so badly, because it is hard to imagine how they could be that way. I went through this three years ago, and I am sad to say that it still affects me a lot when I think about what happened. I feel betrayed, and I feel as though that person has a horrible heart. The good part is, the feelings start to get better over time. If you can start doing something productive, like set a goal for yourself, and make sure you achieve it to your best ability, then you will start getting more self esteem and feeling better about life and the situation. It will also take your mind off of the situation at hand. Start reading about relationships, and start thinking about exactly where you went wrong in that relationship. WHether you know it now or not, your husband gave you signs before you were married that suggested he would someday betray you. SOmetimes people choose to ignore signals out of love and other reasons, but I guarantee you there was some signs. Try to figure out what they were, and be ready to NEVER MAKE THAT mistake again. Give it some time, possibly a year or more and then start dating again. Everything is going to be fine. Depsite everything I went thorugh, I am now in the most loving, and best relationship I have ever been in my life, and I owe it all to recognizing that I control my fate, and the type of person I want to be with, and you have to be really smart when you pick the person that you are going to put your love and trust in. It is one of the most important decosion you will ever make, never to be based on shallow things such as looks or outward apeal. Anyway, good luck, and I promise that you will move on and get the person you deserve if ou think positively, believe what I say and never make the same mistakes over again.

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