When you get married, you also marry your spouses family?

musicimprovedme

Yes. You don't get to choose your parents, your sibs, your crazy aunts and uncles, their stories, or how you fit in that story. When you get married, your spouse agrees to accepts you as a part of that family, and as a person who was influenced by them.

Whether or not you like any of your in-laws, or spend time as a couple with each other's family members, or approve of the things they do, you can't escape at least part of the family's imprint on the person you married.

KingDavid

So so,,,,depends,,My wife's family is very dysfunctional. Yes, I love them and accept them because of her. But I'm not close with them and live 500 miles away.

floridaman39us

Yep. YOu better learn to get along with them. You will be spending holidays with them.

dala_o_2003

Unfortunately yes, its a sacrifice we are willing to take to be with the ones we love. Makes me wonder if I really love this man that much to put up with his family. LOL he probably says the same about mine!

mattface

False. Your spouses family can go choke themselves and ur spouse should agree with that!

karon l

YES ,SO YOU NEED THEM TO LIKE YOU ,OR THEY WILL MAKE YOUR LIFE A NIGHT MARE. I KNOW THIS FIRST HAND AND NOW MY SPOUSES IS MY EX.

True

You are going to be a part of your spouses life and his family is a major part of his life. You don't just get a spouse, you take on his or her entire life as your own.

oliviasmommy613

I dont agree with this because my husband and i are happy but his mother hates me and my huband and i are fine with it we have just accepted it!

Dani

well yeah. they become your family through marriage.

Baby girl due 6/26/09!!

I think that once you get married you develop a genuine love and respect for the spouses family but you don't "marry" them. You have no obligation to that family but to make your spouse happy because they care for your spouse. You marry your spouse and your only obligation is to him/her. Your vows are for your spouse and it is a promise to God, no one else. The problem with so many marriages is that couples involve too many people into their business and frankly, families can break up a marriage. Not saying, that you shouldn't get close to them because they may be lovely people. But your relationship with them should be by choice.

nanna

True. If not my 85yr old father in-law would be in the nursing home.

lady31

True

You will be tied to them forever (or as long as you are with your spouse).

Little Lulu

Yes you do, to a degree. In America marriage are supposed to be a contract between two people, but that seems to depend on how close/dependent those people are on their families. In other countries, marriage is a contract between families, and everybody has a vested interest in getting along and the marriage being happy.

hot_tamale962

I just know some inlaws have the ability to make your life a living hell. also I have heard people say that if it wasnt for their wonderful inlaws they would have left a long time ago. I guess it is some what true depending on how much you have to do with them. my inlaws didnt like me and I didnt like them, but I tried like hell and never got any where. I did divorce but not because of them.

Jen M

Oh, yes. I married my husband when we were living in a different state from his family. Now we live in the same state and spend holidays, etc with them. It wasn't a big deal when we lived far away, we had our own lives but now we have children and rely on them to be in our children's lives.
Even if you have no contact with your family, they still affect your life it subtle ways, my husband acts a lot like his father, more so as he gets older. Had I actually MET his father before we married it may have affected my decision. But probably not. I loved him and still do but seeing his family definitely gives me a different perspective AND I have to deal with them on holidays, etc. They are nice people but not very warm or caring and it's draining. I definitely wish I had different in-laws sometimes. Especially since they are my children's family now too.

tangoman1

when i married my wifes family wer'nt therebut they forgave us we've beenlike brothers my mother in law became like my mum and best friend

mrskerlin

Even if it isn't true it should be. His family should become your family and those relationships should be nutured because it's so important to know who your spouse is and how they grew up and how they interacted with their family. It helps you to know who they are and in turn it helps you to raise your children together. I believe that family is so important.

Suthern Yankee

True. You married their son/brother/uncle, you are now their daughter/sister/aunt. Some holidays are spent with your family, others with his. If you have children, you are tied to that family forever.

Whether you get along with them or not is up to all of you.

ozzie.1947

Well...sort of. You actually don't have to associate with them, etc. But, it's better all around if you all get along. The guy is right. Grandparents do have certain legal rights regarding your offspring if you should try to keep them from seeing them, etc. So, why not get along. Remember, you don't have to agree with somebody to like them.

eyes4dct

yes! thats true because you two brought two familys together thats the happiess thing that can go down in life know you are one big family no matter stay happy and enjoy all that it bring you

lonewolf

True ! It is in your wedding vows, two becomes one flesh ! Family is everything so unless two becomes one flesh,more likely than not the marrige will end in divorce !

dreamyfairy

False. When my husband and I met both sides of parents were against it, and made sure that they got their points across. Ten years later they have no roles in our life or our daughters. We chose to go with what we believed in and it worked for us.

Heather G

Yes. They will be there at every holiday, every family event. They will be your kids grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc...

Just hope that you get good ones. I did not - my husband did :)

But dont stop that from marrying the one you love, you will just need to set-up ground rules and limitations once they over-step your boundries.

~ Noora ~

yes you do lol

the_morris_bears

True! When you get married to join every aspect of your life including you family to the other person. My poor husband inherited the mess that is my family. I luckily inherited the warmest loving in-laws a person could ask for. Marriages create large loving families (supposidly) that's why the future husband should ask permission to marry from the father or brother of the future wife....to help build bonds of family among everyone!
Good Luck,
Momma_Bear

not true at all thats why i am two time divorce i refused to be married to the family will only date man if parents are DEAD

Allison L

True. You're part of that family now, good times and bad. You should respect that family for creating the man you love. You're sharing holidays together, and funerals. When you have kids, they're going to what to see the baby just as much as your side.

lou

Marriage is not the right word for your husbands family. You should go out of your way to make them feel like family though.

balin_danan

For me it was definitely true!, but it could go either way, it all depends on how close the family is that you are marrying into. For example, my wife's family is very close, they speak daily, and 90% live within 30 minutes of each other.

On the other hand my Mum's 2nd marriage the family was old money and did nothing together, hardly spoke, and didn't even kow my mum was married to their beloved son for 3 years!

BOYCOTT ISRAEL AND FRIENDS

NO YOU DONT...

blanca

i would say true. when you marry someone you are marrying everything that is him or her. their family is apart of them they made them who they are today(good or bad)

sboyd257

My husband of 1 1/2years stated that he only married me not my kids. He said that my kids are not connected to him and he has no reason to be close to them. My kids are 34 and 36 and a 17year old grandson. On the other hand, I help him with his double amputee father, try to be the best grandmother to his kids children, etc. The 1 1/2 year marriage will be as far as this marriage go because I know that when you marry someone you take on the entire family rather you like it or not and I am just so hurt that I did not see this from him before-hand.

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