Who is right? Me or my husband?

Stephen K

You either both go or none go.

the_kidfrost

In general, you're right. Once you are married, you are considered a package deal and events, especially weddings.

There are exceptions though. Some weddings are VERY strict on the headcount for budget or decorum reasons. When this is the case, some people have been known to invite only one person from a couple if they are very close with one and don't know the other. Having said that, the manly thing for him do do if this were the case with the invitation is to decline since no real man would leave his wife behind.

It sounds in your case more that your hubby just wants to hit the town and party with hid buddies without you around.

Courtney

Wait a minute people. Back up. When the friend gets married? Ok. So we don't have an actual invitation yet. When we do whoever it's addressed to will be expected to attend. If his friend only addresses it to her husband and not both of them then that's a different story.

Do you have an invitation already?

If you do and it's addressed to both of you something isn't right here. However that's an awful lot of money to spend on a ticket. : (

After my husband and I were married (all our friends from everywhere attended) a couple years later one of his friends who was in our wedding party got married. My husband was in their wedding but it was out of state. So I stayed home because we couldn't afford two tickets. : (

I think there's more going on than the question at hand. Something deeper may be affecting your relationship.

made it to the top

no your right...he should get to decide whether or not your going...and i know that he could find cheaper tickets if he shopped around..sounds like he may just want a break, and wants to go on vacation alone...

HAVE,HAD & PROBABLY WILL

insist on going, you have every right to go.
Tell your husband to quit being cheap and tell him everything that you have told us. If he is worried about $$$ sit down and disscuss ways to save $$ in other areas of everyday life to replenish the cost of the trip. If he doesn't change his mind
the put your foot down and tell him that if you both don't go
then nobody does. If you can afford it then do it.
see it as a romantic getaway 4 you both. and make it clear to your husband that if the groom was in your wedding then it would only
be good manners 4 you both to attend his.

mike_alegend

Soiunds a little frishy to me...Somethings up, (no pun intended).

apolicky

When a couple marry, they should involve each other in everything...i have been married four years and i have never left my husband out...nor has he left me out...i think even if you dont know his friend, your husband should be happy to introduce you to him.

Southern Cowgirl

I honestly think he is not going alone and that he might be hiding something from you. That is not right That he doesnt want to you to come along even though you dont know this person very well and I think you need to tell him that a man and woman who are married are supposed to do things together and if he is hiding something from you then its not going to work out cause thats not right.

ogg08

unquestionably, you go, girl... to the wedding...

Leonardo P

for me this is unfair because this are wedding of his friend and not a simple party that exclusive for the boys only or maybe he should hiding for something happens after three years of marriage

phantom43

i don't believe he is cheating... cut the brother some slack.. he just wants to spend time with an old friend he can act like a college student with and not have to be respectable or embarrass you. ie (swallowing goldfish or some other stupid guy thing) especially if he is going before the wedding. he wants to feel young again just for a moment. give him this small pleasure. he will be back and refreshed with joy and laughing to himself later of the stupid things they did. he may or may not tell you about it because it will be foolish stuff.

Kat

nope hes not right.. and if he can afford a ticket at that price then he can afford 2 of them.. what is he doing going first class or something. he should at least ask you to go and if you don't want to go that's your choice but to say you cant go would be a no no for me.. no one tells me what i can and cant do..and i don't tell hubby what he can and cant do.. we always tell each other what we are doing but hes not my father so i don't need his permission.. good luck

Jai

Of course your right and you should be able to go with him to the wedding. Have you tole him what your telling us?

;-)

YOU ARE 100% RIGHT, TELL HIM TO STOP BEIN A CHEAPASS.

jgrey1goose

try not to be to upset about this and do not resent your husband for it.

let him go, tell him that you hope he has a good time and to take a lot of pictures. let him know that as time goes on you would like to meet this friend who is a big part of your husbands life. maybe even suggest that you can save up and take a vacation to where ever the friend is to meet him and his new wife.

tell him in a gentle way that you are sorry money is what's holding you back from attending his friend's wedding.

last but most important, wish his friend and his friends new spouse well in there new life together.
maybe you can arrange to make a toast during the wedding by phone through your husband.

assure your husband that you mean well but are disappointed and feel left out.

charlesjerrell

you are, nuff said

!Y?

U R obviously RIGHT... He just doesnt want excess luggage.
2bz.

Stacy N

Tell him fine, but then you are going on vacation too, take a cruise or go visit someone else at the sametime.That way you will find out if it is a money issue or something else

Shawn W

I think a couple should attend such events as much as possible.

However, there may be concerns that your husband may not be relating well as to why he should go alone.

Firstly, the airfare may only be the tip of the ice berg. Maybe he is able to put up with his friend at his place as a single person and to save cost? Maybe there are some catching up between the guys and he doesnt want to leave you behind if you are there but would be different if you are there? Talk it out...maybe it is possible that you fly in on the day before the wedding and give him some time to catch up with his friend.

Do communicate about it more. There is nothing wrong with him attending it by himself. Especially if he knows you will be bored and thereafter wants him to be by your side the whole time, which thereby reducing the time they can catch up.

EazyBreezy

You are right- you should be more than welcome to go to the wedding with your husband, especially if you can afford both tickets. The fact that he is insisting on going alone sounds fishy, if not just plain inconsiderate.
If he insists on going alone, then book yourself a vacation anywhere you want to go (for the same length of time) and go alone! Tell him he's not invited because he won't know anyone there!!!

anil s

ok he not goig alone whate can you do tele me natting ok so youthink how can clear this problem ithink god can solv this problem trust god sincerile god can do any thing what you are loking that is all trash the only way god way he is the creater they can solve your life ok god is only one with you by

summer_summer1978

Do some research for cheaper tickets and get two tickets and pay for them yourself and meet him at the airport.

jayman31

U r right. U should go with him unless he has a hidden agenda. Not to say this is the case but seems fishy. My wife would freak out on me if it were us. However she would go becuz I would feel bad if she didn't. If he is afraid of the price have him shop around more for fares. That seems awful high for the ticket, but I do not know where u guys r flying from. Also is this a childhood friend he grew up with? If so r there going to be other friends from back in the day (especially women)? Well anyways good luck and hope it works out but in my opinion u r right.

WORKING OLDER SMARTER BLONDE

who made him chief? grab that charge card and buy yourself a ticket.

linda l

Maybe your husband needs to stay home&work on saving his own marriage...

Turtle

Is he saying this because you can't afford for both to go? Jeez, why is the flight so expensive? Tell him you and he will fly red-eye or stand-by but you're going too. If both can't go then neither of you should go and he shouldn't just tell you he's going and you're not, that's what you make it sound like anyway, and that's not nice or right. Now, if he insists on going, then tell him you'll start planning a trip for yourself for next year and he can't go! Then do it!!

dominiki22

I don't think he is justified he didn't give you a good enough reason it be different if you got drunk at all the functions and danced on tables but if you are not know to be that outrageous there is no reason that he should go to a wedding by himself because it will also make you look like the bad wife because when they ask him where is your wife he is probably going to say she didn't want to come you see what I mean.

Southern Girl

I think you've got every right to be bothered by this. Any place that I wouldn't take my spouse is a place I wouldn't go. Sounds like your hubby has another reason for not wanting you there.

--Sidenote--
When I was a kid my dad drug us all to a wedding of a co-worker that we'd never even met before. You don't know the friend is a crappy excuse

skunk

No he is not right. If he goes you go. I took my wife with me every place i went.

dadw5boys

HE WANTS TO GO RAISE A LITTLE HELL WITH AN OLD BUDDY LET HIM GO!

aimdougl

nope...you are right. You go together or he doesn't go. I would be hurt too. 1100.00 seems like alot. Has he shopped around for lower priced tickets?

Good Luck with this.

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