Why am I so upset by my husbands past? ?

cassie_bolding

It's just the hormones baby. I wouldn't put too much stock into it. Just find yourself something to indulge in when you feel upset by it. Maybe a nice hot bath and some chocolates. Watch all of your favorite movies and just do what makes you happy. The past is the past. I should know. I have one and it means nothing to me now that I have my husband. He means the world to me and I only want to focus on our future. I'm sure your husband feels the same.

erics wifey

omg.. let it go the past is the past...*

cupidgirl.

dont discuss the past. you are his present & future & so is your baby. he cant change any of it so there's no sense in bringing it up or holding it against him- it will only damage your relationship. Im sure if he could change it he WOULD but he cant so let it go!

Valerie X Account #17 MEAN GIRL

Whatever the number he has told you- Multiply that by 10.

Feel better now?!

Kayleigh

Quit asking the question. Remember he had a life before you. Yes, it's probably hormones.

mzdrea08

Why don't you let it go. I know it will be hard, but what difference does it make how many women he's been with before you. They are in the past and you are obviously his now and future. For the sake of your unborn child..let it go.

iaveter

Thia is absolutely normal! In 9 months time you will be back in love with him again! Good luck!

Bob S

Because you're jealous you should get over it that's the past

marypoppins

you're immature.

don't ask if you don't want to know the answer.

EDIT: how can he be honest with you if you're crying! it's a lose-lose situation for him, so if i were him, i make the number low. basically, i'd lie just to keep you from crying.

Tiff Tiff

why do you keep asking him that?? all that stuff should have been resolved before you got married.. from the second you said i do, you both decided to start a new life together.. let it go now.. and by the sounds of your question, it seems you are pregnant.. well that is the reason things are bothering you so much now and didnt before.. once you are not pregnant anymore, you will be able to handle these thoughts much better!

Short_and_Sweet

We women wish we were the only ones they ever had. Man, if only! LOL

Beth

If you're honest with yourself, you don't really want to know how many women he's been with. It's a self-defeating and destructive question women ask because they have a morbid fascination with bad boys...but then they get angry when they hear the truth.

Let it rest, and yes, it's the hormones. He's with you now, so enjoy your life together and leave the past where it belongs...:-)

always an opinion

If this never bothered you until you were pregnant I am going to vote it's hormones. It sounds a little weird for you to have this reaction. Maybe you should talk to your doctor. You are supposed to be hormonal but I think you may have crossed the line.

cajuninafrica

It could be hormones but the thing that I would like to know is wether or not you were a virgin when you met your husband?

Juggman

Oh...you're pregnant. You'll be ok after you have the baby. Honestly, after 6 years, those girls are just memories. Relax.

Miloo

definitely the hormones talking... if it's a deeper problem, it's the kind that rests entirely with you, not with him, so you better hope it's just hormones.

Fact is he probably can't remember, which just underscores how important they all were compared with you.

He didn't just spring this on you yesterday, if you chose to make a life with him knowing what you knew, then you need to find that bridge.

Gary B

it is both -- hormones AND a deeper problem.

You married him! And it sound like you were well aware of his history before you got married. So that much of you is hormones talking.

But you still have a deep distrust, and THAT was present even before you married. you just ignored it, but now, with the hormones, it is coming to a head.

You need to seek professional marriage counseling before this situation drives you to a divorce.

Gypsy Red

First of all, he doesn't owe you an answer on this. It is really none of your business. If he told you he was a virgin before he met you that would be different. He came with a past and so did you. The number in the past really doesn't matter. You are making your self miserable and that's just stupid. You are going to harm your baby with this and probably your marriage. If you can't get control of yourself. Go see your doctor and have him get you some help.
Red

justme24202

oh man girl i totally udnerstand. i have been w/ my boyfriend for 2 yrs... i'm a couple yrs older than u but the thought of some of the thigns that he did in his past ... upset me,etc. it is a jealously issue to an extent. alot of ppl r like that... you just gotta think about the future, cant live in the past, it will kill you. i understand trust me.

D with R

How many guys have been in your past? Think of those fond memories.

crazytazzygirl

Don't let the jealousy consume you. It is a disease, and the stress on you and your baby is harmful.

That being said, it probably bothers you more so now because of the hormonal changes in your body. I would highly suggest discussing this with your doctor at your next visit.

Don't let the number of women bother you. Look at it this way, he may have forgotten about most of them and you just keep rehashing it. Let him forget! I haven't been with that many people, but when asked outright, I don't always remember. He may not be lying, he may be forgetting. Then again, if he is lying, he's only trying to protect you. Let him. Honestly, what difference does it make how many women came before you? You'd be upset if that no. was just 1 or 2, also. Relax. He may have been with 19 women before you, but you'll be the last one. Enjoy that!

michael

The fact is that he chose to marry you and only you which makes any other women insignificant.

He loves you and sees something in you that he didn't see in other people he dated.

Good luck!

Kelly M

You are definitely experiencing fluctuating hormone levels ... this is very normal.

But, you also need to stop thinking about the past. You are hurting yourself, and stressing the baby out. He is here with YOU now....what is important is that you rest, and think about all the wonderful memories you will make with your husband and new baby.

Good luck!

Pink Sugar

I think u need to leave the past in the past. Look my mother always told me that if u keep bring up other women to ur man that it will make him think of them. See ur only making ur husband think of those women that are in his past. STOP DOING THAT YOU ARE PUSHING HIM OUT THE DOOR. YOUR MAKING HIM THINK OF OTHER WOMEN. THATS THE LAST THING YOU WANT TO DO!!!! Besides dont u know that jealousy is ugly and it shows signs of weakness. And who wants a weak person. If your marriage fails it will be ur fault.

Sean

You're in the grip of your hormones. Many women have jealousy issues when they're pregnant.

Just try to not alientate your husband and things will calm down later.

Wiz

Stop asking stupid questions to which you really don't want a truthful answer. It would not matter if the number were 1 or a hundred and has nothing to do with you. The only number that might be relevant is how many has he been with since you have been married. If that number is zero, then get over it.

B_boy

Pregnancy can sometimes make you emotional, sad and insecure about yourself. But don't be just smile because you are about to have a child, and that should be a celebration time, not a worrying or sad emotional time.

b_boy

dodgeramcharger84

Did you know this before you were married? You made vows, now it's only right to stick by them. The past is in the past. Focus on now and the future.

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: