Why do I feel such a rush to have kids?

This is killing me. Sometimes I have baby fever, but it goes away for a while. I usually end up telling myself I need to wait a while because I need to get my life in order a bit more before having a baby. I don't want to wait forever, and I know that everything will never be 100% perfect, however I have two years left of school and I'm thinking of joining the Air Force this year. It's something I want to do, and will better myself, and since my husband is in already we will make pretty decent money, and be able to afford a baby in the near future. Anyway, all of the military wives that I know have babies already. One of my friends is 18 with 2 children. I have noticed though that none of them are furthering their education past high school level, and my 18 year old friend didn't even do that. But, it's still hard. My mom is starting to talk about babies with me more often, and my grandpa really wants me to have kids. Im 21 though, and my hubby is 24. I figure in about another two years it will be perfect. What do you think, and do you think I'm waiting for no reason, and why do i feel this rush so badly?
Additional Details
I dont plan on staying in the air force forever. Just 4 years. My husband will probably retire, but not me. I just need this extra push for myself, and it looks great on a resume. i am getting my bachelors degree, and by the time Im out I will have it!

ikra_chyornaya

WHatever you do, don't join the military (or air force)!!!!

TO answer your question, you have pretty much answered it- he people you hang out with have kids, thus you feel he pressure!

Find other friends. There are plenty of people even in their early- mid-late 20's that don't have kids yet, but you do have to go out and meet them.

Good luck!!!
But remember - air force is a mistake! There are plenty of other smarter ways to make a career, of course they do take more effort, than air force, but it will pay of better at the end!!!!

ouragon

My theory is that something is missing inside you, and you think a baby will fill it up. The truth is, babys don't fill needs, they come with their own HUGE set of needs.

Please get an education. When you find out all the things you can do in the world, you might not be so eager to settle for being someones mom.

bandaid_46

If you join the AF and both of you are deployed, who is going to take care of the baby? There are lots of good paying jobs in the civilian sector, too.

You would do well to finish school and decide what you are going to do with the rest of your life before you add a baby to the mix. You are only 21. You have plenty of time to have babies after you are done maturing and know what you really want to do with your life.

Kristiane-Cubical ninja

Wait until you are totally done with school and know what job you will be in, whether it is enlisted or something else.
If you have the child prior to joining and your husband is already in, you cannot enlist, FYI. You can of course have one after you enlist though.
21 is young, you have MANY years of fertility left, you can't put the baby back though if you realize too late that you should have waited a little while longer. :)

Ray B

Relax. You have plenty of time! Being in the military is a great advantage for both of you, make the most of it, finish your education and then start that family!

melaniex4

You are still very young. You have so much time to get to do all the things you want. I think only you can tell when it is time for you to start your family. I don't think you are waiting for no reason. I think you are waiting for your reasons which are the right reasons. Don't allow others to make those decisions for you. Enjoy the right now and the hard work will pay off in the end. Best wishes.

redhead27

Your haven't even reached the age of full maturity for a woman yet, women reach full matury at 24 years old my dear. Just because other girls had a baby at 18 doesn't deem it resopnsible or OK for you to. I think you just want to play house with some babies, but trust me, if you don't have the funds or the life experience to raise and teach those kids then your not doing them any favors.

Just to mention, those babies grow up... when they do, what will you be able to teach them when your still growing up yourself.

locita_amor

You have plenty of time to have children. Go and get your education and get fianacely stable first. You don't have to do what everyone else is doing. Sounds like you have a head on your shoulders so don't let that go to waste. Follow your plans first. They say that a woman has until she is 35 to have children so you have time girl.

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: