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DR V
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You expect him to be different on certain days, and he feels the pressure. Maybe the days are not special to him, and you are angry about that. |
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beanodom
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Theres no excuse for him treating you that way on your days. Yes the anniversary is both your day but do you treat him like that? When he wants you to move he should say " Honey can you move?" not hit you with the door. This is all types of abuse and you shouldnt put up with it. He should treat you with respect every day of the year. |
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hate the sand ~ love the castle
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Awws woman I'm so sorry to know :(
Your man have no right to pushed you like that.
Tell him you feel creepy how he treated you & you wish for him to stop & treat you like a wife.
Most time the one we love is the one that hurt us most... I'm sorry hun I know you prolly love him & it's hard. Give him a time after you tell him, if he doesn't stop then you should leave him for awhile & maybe it will make him realize! Take care hun & bless your heart!!! Get better!!! |
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northlakesage
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I guess it depends on how fast you can HIT THE FLOOR RUNNING. He wants to make sure that any disappointment you might feel for never getting anything nice from him will be all your fault.
It's only a matter of time before you're telling that nice police officer who is helping you stop your bleeding, "It was all my fault. He warned me he might have to push me down the stairs for my own good." |
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mc
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I believe he has a problem that he does not want to face. he hates holidays and he likes to hurt you. |
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neenie64
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maybe you should just say what you expect from him at these holidays etc. Men need you to be clear with them about what you want from them. Maybe he wants to enjoy these occasions with you. So don't avoid your anniversary tell him how you would like to celebrate and what you would like for a gift. If he's still mean, abusive, rude etc. Then maybe you should really think long an hard about spending the rest of your life with an *** like that. |
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AALLIISS
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sounds like my EX (hint hint) |
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tinydoll29
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hun once they start to treat you like that and you let it go i he will never stop... cause he thinks he can get away with treated you that way... his lost respect for you and you need to get it back,,,,tell him how you feel that your not been respected and that it hurts your feelings...that this needs to stop right away if he doesnt put an end to it you need to be hush and leave for a couple of days ... my husband did the same.... not anymore i tell ya not puting up with it at all you shouldnt as well |
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Dove
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issues issues issues
I would not stay married to someone like that. He pushed you with a door and you are more upset by his lack of concern for you on holidays. I would be more upset about the lack of concern for your safety. I would leave. |
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iltmaemc
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sounds like you husband has some confront issues that could be from guilt or he feels inadequate that is how he hides it |
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atheism_and_rats
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Move on out; find someone else. Lifes too short to waste on people like that. |
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xbeautifulsuicidex
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sounds like he is bipolar |
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rpetch007
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lady you have to tell him to just respect you that all you want good luck.. or you have to leave him till he grow up |
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moongoddess
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Sounds to me like he boderline abusive and maybe bipolar the best thing you can do is get help because shoving you with a door that is spousal abuse it can escalate into extreme violance get help now before its to late. |
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Horserider75
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Pushing you and the dog with that door is more indicative than you think. He really is trying to shut you out. Dealing with birthdays or other special events makes him angry because he KNOWS he should do something nice, but he doesn't want to. He doesn't want to because that involves him in the 'relationship'. It's all so annoying to him because he doesn't want to be reminded that 'real love' would behave differently.
8 years of someone working so hard (by doing nothing except getting angry) to let you know that he doesn't want to do this deal, would be enough for some to start making different plans for their life. You might have grown to believe that you have no right to want or hope that someone would love you enough to treat you like the special person you are. You have to make that kind of decision for yourself, but you really do deserve more. My take is he's not in this for the REAL deal and that you should move to a more positive next 8, 16, 30 years of your life. Get rid of the Grinch. |
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MiMi Sugar
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Sounds to me like you are on the road to beinging an abused wife. First comes shoving, then more. He forgets holidays and occasions so he starts a fight rather then feel bad that he missed it. i would seek help and counceling for you both. Number 1 take care of you!!!1 Becareful |
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Angelica
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Bad childhood? That would be my mom's answer. My dad is the same way. It has gotten better of the years but only because my mom threatened to divorce him. |
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pennee_l
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You are his punching bag! OK, not literally, but certainly in the way that he is taking his frustrations out on you. Tell me the truth, would he get upset if you didnt acknowledge his birthday in some way by getting him a card, or a present? If the answer is yes, then he is aware that he is probably hurting your feelings quite often, but that he just doesnt care. How does that make you feel? Why are you letting him treat you so awful? You deserve to have someone who makes you feel special. However, if you're happy settling for second best, I wish you luck (it appears that you are going to need it).
Seriously! My husband and I seperated for 18 months when my kids were little, because of just what you have described, (only difference was, I was standing in front of the cricket on the TV when he pushed me.). Unfortunately, even though we got back together 2 years ago, I see the old behaviour starting back up where my husband only gets angry at me when he should be making me feel appreciated. Looks like I better show him the door, before he gets physical again! (sad but true). |
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CindyLu
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He has a real problem that is going to get worse without some professional help. He is becoming abusive which is a problem for you . You need to leave him plain and simple. He is not going to get better on his own so you must either make him seek the help he so badly needs or you must leave him for your own safety. If you allow this behavior to go on ( and you have let it go for far far too long already) you will regret it. You should be able to see that he is escalating to violence now and that trend will continue to grow, Get him to get help, or help yourself and get out. |
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richard t
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sounds like Mama's boy................spoiled.......... |
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Travis
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go to family counciling....or actually tell him the truth, he might rethink his ways and change for the better...especially if he wants to hold on to u. |
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erin
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I was originally going to say that maybe he reacts so negatively because he feels defensive about what you have to say; but do you think he is violent, or his anger just gave way this one time? If his anger comes to a head so much as he is hurting you or anyone else, then your problem may be more problematic than what you think it is. |
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crazy girl
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he doesn't appreciate you, im sure of it. im sorry about what ur going through. it seems like he's taking advantage of you. if not that, then he just changes some ways to make him think he needs you or something. its hard to explain, but i say take it to marriage counseling, not much for you, but for him. if he refuses the subject, something fishy's goin on.. :0 GL♥ |
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pandy lynn
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stand up 4 ur self
u don't need to be getting hit by doors
and u don't need to keep knocking your brains around trying to figure out what u did ''wrong;'' i don't care if u and the dog were leaving, coming, staying, whatever-nothing excuses that behavior, and who's to say it won't happen again
if you're trying to figure him out, that's understandable, but your safety is more important; he'll be ok if u need to leave
sometimes people get pissy and act strange-i doubt that it's personal-obviously something's going on with him, but it may not have anything to do with u or the holiday- |
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rubyred
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Excuse me, but your husband sounds like a man with alot of problems. Trust your gut - if you don't feel safe living with him, take your dog and get out while the gettin's good. |
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Miss Priss
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It's probably a way to avoid the sentiment of the holiday. Maybe he doesn't know what to do and gets angry instead so he doesn't have to figure it out. Try planning something together the next time a special occasion comes around and see what happens. Good luck! |
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randall_nd
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Sounds like my father during my childhood and beyond. He used to be less patient on Sundays and Holidays. After many years, I finally convinced both my parents to take a Saint John's Wort once a day. It has made a world of difference. I'm no psychiatrist, but comparing your situation with mine, I'd strongly suggest a serotonin deficit. Basically, he needs to be on an antidepressant. It's not your fault. The problem won't go away on it's own. The sooner he realizes it's a biochemical imbalance and desires to be a better man, the better. Never forget what you said to each other while getting married. For better or for worse, in sickness and in health. If he's human at all, he'll understand. |
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§♥Elisabeth♥§
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Maybe he feels bad because he can't get you the things he wants to...or that he think you expect things and he can't or doesn't want to give them....and that is his only way of expressing his frustration maybe? |
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Southern Girl
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Maybe something happened in this past to make him this way..or maybe he is mad at something you have done that you don't know that has effected him. I would try to talk to him about it, if all else fails, be pissy back lol. |
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