Wife was on Paxil a few years ago & it was the worst part of our marriage; now, new doctor, suggests Paxil...?

"Arkie Mom"

I was on Paxil about 8 or 9 years ago and took it inconsistently until it landed me into a depression that lasted about 6 years. During this depression I was put on one or two antidepressants trying to get me straight until I slept around 18 hours or more in a day. My house was a mess and my family especially my kids had to have gone through a he!! because of a mother that couldn't wake up. Other family members frowned upon me because I was "lazy" and never once tried to help my kids, taking them from me would have been the best thing that could have happened to them. Thank goodness, about 3 years ago through a traumatic event with my daughter I vowed to God if everything went alright with my daughter I would do everything in my power to not let things get me down so much. Even with a more positive attitude the sleeping thing continued. I decided, at the end of my last prescription, that if that was as good as was going to get,I wasn't taking them anymore. After that, it was like I remembered what it was like to smile and be happy again and what was best I went back to a normal sleep pattern. I firmly believe that there are people that have to have them, but, from time to time you are going to hit lows in life and solutions to them can be found for them in something other than in a pill bottle. If you care about your wife PLEASE watch her closely because that period of my life was misery and wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.

Honey Bee

While I disagree with your sentiments, I do have to say this: I don't support anyone ever taking psychiatric medications prescribed from anyone without an adequate psychology background! Too many general practitioners prescribe psychiatric medications like candy when they don't have enough knowledge of psychology. A few psych classes and a psych rotation doesn't cut it! There are different causes of psychological disorders. Sometimes, psychological disorders are situational. Other times, psychological disorders are chemical. Meaning, just because someone feels depressed doesn't mean they have clinical depression. It doesn't mean they've got a disorder per se. It means they've got some psychological issues to work through. Someone with a background in psychology is able to get to the root of this. A GP isn't. Most GPs don't even bother to ask questions about the patient's psychological background or current situations or issues. GPs often just do more harm than good. They just hand out an prescription without bothering to find out the real problem. Your wife should see a psychologist or, if she wants to explore the option of medications, a psychiatrist. Most people should see a psychologist first though, and the psychologist will refer her to a psychiatrist if they feel she needs medications. A psychologist will find out whether or not she's got a clinical disorder and a definite chemical imbalance that needs medicated, or whether she's depressed because of issues that are going on in her life and things she needs to work through on her own. If a qualified professional does suggest she take meds, she should take them as directed, not inconsistently. It's not really a good judgment of whether or not they were working if she wasn't even taking them properly. And don't accuse her of "wallowing in self pity or escapism." Too many people feel that people judge them this way, and it's sad when people out there actually are judging them like this. Psychological disorders are disorders just like medical disorders, and they deserve the same respect. You wouldn't tell a patient with MS that they're lazy or self-pitying, would you? The difference is psychological disorders can have psychological or chemical roots, mostly a varying degree of both, and a professional needs to figure that out. Not a GP with no solid background in it. NEVER take psychiatric meds from someone without a solid psych background!

autumn

I don't know why she was prescribed Paxil, but if it was for anxiety or depression, there are other medications that might work better for her. Depending on how severe her condition, it is possible that something else could help in place of medication. I do know that taking them inconsistently is not advised. Though you didn't go into any detail of what possible side effects she suffered, it doesn't sound like she did at all well on the Paxil. Before she gets a prescription filled, why don't you suggest she see another doctor for a recommendation. Be sure she tells him/her how the drug affected her the last time she was on it. She may want to see a psychiatrist for evaluation, too. As for her wallowing in self-pity and escapism, I can't comment on that as you know her better than we do. Some people enjoy wallowing and others don't, but are actually asking for help.

KAT

Tell her that she doesn't act like herself when she takes those pills. The worst thing a woman can ever want is not being there own bubbly self. Go tell her that maybe she should just not take the pills and see if everything works out.

Tsunami

you need to go with her and find out what is wrong sometimes if they take it all thet ime they will be ok but they have to be on the meds all the time. shes not on them most of the time and that si what was wrong its not the pill its the person not taking them and getting better she must need soemthign and i would suggest go with her and talk to this doctor about what happened.

Kate

Wallowing in her self-pit and escapism? It sounds like she does have a problem and medication can be helpful. I suggest speaking to the doctor about the previous problems and asking if her inconsistency in taking the pills could have had anything to do with the problems.

Also, support and encouragement are probably the only ways to help her on your part. I don't know what is going on in your lives, but if she feels badly you won't be able to "convince" her in any way. The way she is feeling isn't necessarily something she can control. Try being understanding and supportive regardless of what she has to go through. Do a little research into what is bothering her or what is going on with her.

krystaldlrs

Tell her the truth.. that it was a nightmare last time she was taking them & you don't want to go though that again. Beating around the bush gets a man nowhere.. you have to be blunt with a woman to get your point across. Tell her if she gets on Paxil again, you're going to kill yourself.

Michael T

Find a doctor that you know doesn't like them. Get her to go that one and get a second opinion.

Clementine

advise her of alternative medicine

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