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Pink Denial
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Yes, I would leave. |
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☼☆♦♫♥ Christina ♥♫♦☆☼
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Hi, sorry about you situation... I just wanted to let you know ... God answers knee mail! Good Luck! |
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pink baby
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same thing happend to my parents they went to conceling and eventually my mom took of with my sister and i and after that he changed alot. |
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Paula80
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if i were you i would have left a long time ago....i know the first step is the hardest....but then it is only a step away..good luck |
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Frankie
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U have to think about the children and whats best for them. Mama's not happy they can sense that. Maybe if u do leave it will open his eyes up and he will get the help he needs. U can't force someone to change they have to want to do it. Good luck. |
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hotmomma
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I would pack my kids and leave. I would tell him that when he finds his family is more important than pills you willl come back. If you lave him you gotta be tough with him. Tell him calmly and tell the kids you are going to stay with grandma for a while. Do not make a big scene, the kids do not need that. |
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Julie H
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Go talk to a divorce lawyer and find out your rights in your state. He needs help but if he doesn't want to quit, help is pointless. It sounds as if things are not going to get better for you so I would consider divorce. You realize that it is only a matter of time before he loses his job over this and then you will be stuck with a depressed, addicted man in your home that you will have to support both financially and emotionally. Do it now before things get worse. |
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Cornell is Hot!
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yes i would leave. he needs rehab. it will only get worse. |
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asdfjkl;
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Don't leave him..help him! |
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SirSnoozeAlot
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You need to get your husband some help because he is addicted to the pain medication and benzodiazepines. If you start with that he might shapen up but housework is one of the easier things to compromise on so he should help out.
Good luck |
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Freedspirit
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I can't answer that for you....you have to follow your heart.....I too was married to a pillpopper a long time ago and after 8 years I left, however I did not have any children with him. It was the best thing I ever did for both of us. I realized I couldn't "save" him, he had to save himself and either sink or swim......he wound up swimming. He got help, cleaned up his act etc. Remember, you CAN'T change anyone....only yourself. |
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NY
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Hi i am married too.
I understand how you feel as a wife when the huby just don't help anything around the house.
I think both of you been taking pills which mean both of you are no longer happy.
If i have someone i love i would not need the pills :)
I know it hard to leave him
Even if you stay it would not be good for the kids either
I say give this up & it time you find the person that will make you happy
Your kids will understand & will find a person to make them happy as well
Wish you good luck ya
May god bless all of us :) |
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Rose T
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I feel for you. You are in a tough situation. You love your husband but hate what he is doing too himself, you and the kids. I have a friend in the same situation as you are,she had a great life with 2 kids and a husband that brought home $1000.00 a week salary,. He got hooked on pills,started off with just the ones you mentioned, after a few years he started having too have more and more,now he brings home $00000,she is working and trying too make ends meet, they have lost everything. I will tell you what I told her just the other night. GET OUT NOW, unless he is willing too get help and get clean!! give him 24 hrs too make a desision, the pills...or his family. stick with your desision for your kids sake and yours. It will get worse, believe me, if he doesn't get help now.Good luck, I hope you take my advice. |
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chet gurung
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No,for the sake of children.Try to solve that pill problem.Everything gonna be ok. |
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G I Z M O
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You don't want your kids to be raised by some junkie? Do you? Sorry if I am being harsh but that's how I see it.
I would leave, yeah. Take your kids and go. |
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gmconlan
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He needs professional help to kick his drug habit. |
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catzrme
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Your husband needs substance abuse help. I cam e right out and told mine either knock it off, or you do it on your own. He's gotten the message.
Don't let up on him. First, call his doctor and talk with him. Don't let the doctor prescirbe any more pills for him. Tell him why and that you suspect he is abusing them.
If all else fails, you will have to leave, if only for a little while. Take the children and go to mom's or somewhere else. Maybe he'll snap out of it if he sees that you are serious. |
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ideally_rational
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Get him into therapy for substance abuse. Then you'll find out if he sees the light and decides to change or not. |
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blickyjunk
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I would contact the physician that has prescribed these medications for your husband and inform them of his addiction they may be able to prescribe something else or have more information on what you can do to get help for your husband. After consulting with them you may have a better understanding of what to do and if you are willing to do it. |
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lexilynds
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Yes i would leave too! you want to live your life to its fullest. and he can't give you that if your going to be worried and crap about him. you need to worrry about yourself. not others.
GOOD LUCK! :D |
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ars7210
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If these things really do bother you, I would try going to some sort of marriage counselor and create a plan that will help him stay out of his habits. I would recommend this if you really do love each other and don't want to leave. If this doesn't work, then you should leave. |
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♥BRITTANY♥
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This is a problem with a lot of men sometimes it takes you leaving before he really understands the seriousness of your anger .....so you've talked to him and you've tried to work things out ....but yet you still have nothing! Go ahead and leave or threaten him that your leaving and if he loves you the way you say he does trust me he will get his act together but first you play a little game. Dont accept his phone calls for a few days just to make him think that you dont care about him anymore that drives him crazy, and finally one day answer and act like you dont care and when you finally take him back make him seek help. Dont feel weak and dont feel like you cant get results....be strong ,pray, and fight. Hope I helped! |
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baby_face_paris
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If I felt that I had done all I could and there was nothing left, I would leave.
He has a serious problem but only he can do something about it. He has to want to change.
I really feel for you but you have to put yourself and your children first.
Be strong. |
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Pam
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Well he has an addiction and maybe he doens't realise it. Tell him you'll leave if he doens't get help. If he denies the help I'll leave. |
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D_Luvli
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No. I wouldn't leave. Leaving is never a choice when you are in love. "Till Death Do You Part" I would let him know how much i love him and how much his children love him. Then I would tell him that if he can't stop taking pills for himself he should do it for his children. You and him should go see a psychiatrist together. That lets him know that you are supporting him, and he'll stop quicker with a better attitude. |
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Oh la la!
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Have you tried just sitting down with him and having a heart to heart?...... If he denys he has a problem then he is addicted and needs help. i don't think you should leave him because there is a solution and it is ..... I hate to say it. Rehab. If he refuses to go to rehab tell him you NEED some time away and you are taking the kids. He may snap back to place during that time... if he doesn't then I would consider divorce
PS don't have the converstation with your kids in the house..... he could start yelling and that isn't good for them to hear |
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Heather
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you need to really think about the kids and what's best for them! I know it's hard but what's right isn't always easy to do. Good Luck. |
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Mr realistic...believer in truth
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Find a church for some spiritual retooling for the both of you, this may also create more harmony for your children.
Secondly, you both need to get some substance abuse counseling to help you understand why you need drugs to cope.
Don't give up. |
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sskstru
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If you love him, get him help. As a recent divorcee, I can tell you that marriage takes comprimise, but you can't change people. If you are truly unhappy, leave for yourself, not because of him. Chances are his unwillingness to help you around the house is something that didn't just start. It sounds to me like you need to let go and find your own happiness in life. In the end, it all comes down to what you really want.. no one can really asnwer this question for you but yourself. |
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Advice*is*free
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Your at that trial period in marriage where most marriages have trouble and many people split. I would say don't give up just yet. I very much understand the issue with pills I lived it through my mom It's hard to deal with so I'm understanding on that aspect. Maybe you could get online to web md and look up info on those pills and print out the harm they can do to a body if taken improperly to show him I know for a fact xanax can have ill effects on your nervous system. You can also try talking to his doctor (which will upset him). I tell everyone on here that has marriage problems to read Love and Respect and Cracking the Communication Code by Emmerson Eggrich (you can buy the cd's online at loveandrespect.com. Try working on rekindleing the love you have for eachother and then maybe he will be more willing to realize his addiction and the impact it has on you and the kids. I am very sorry to hear of your situation and i wish u the best. Try these books and apply the knowledge give it a year and then if you don't see him trying to change his drug use tell him it's your family or the drugs what's more important? Now I'm not telling you to divorce him ( i don't believe in it) but if you take this drastic measure you must prepare yourself for a very hard road so really try to work it out with the help from these books. Remember yur vows this is the "worse" part. |
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