Would you let your girlfriend or wife/ husband or boyfriend .....?

larry j

No#

flyingdove

Let them? Its not my decision if they do this or not, as everyone has free will and will do what they want to do whether I would "let them" do it or not!

I <3 him

yyea, you can't stop someone from having firends!

....

Let.... lol.... let?..... L-E-T? rotflmfao!!!!!!

I would think that if you were in a relationship with someone that it is a healthy on in which neither one has 100% control over the other (otherwise you might as well get a blow up doll).

Let.... lol... thats too funny!!!!!

If your special someone continues to remain in contact with their ex... you need to have a conversation about the reasons why that is happening and then decide if you can live with it or not. If you can't.. then terminate the relationship.

lol.. ohhhhhhh whew.. let... thats a good one!

abc

it wouldn't be up to me to LET my spouse have contact or not have contact with his ex....that is his choice....I don't control him

Java Queen

goodgirlabout2gobad

of course i would have no control over him, but i would hope that if he felt that he could be just friends with her...he wouldn't sneak behind my back to do it. I really would have to know why he wanted to be in a relationship with his ex, and if there was no legitimate reason ie....kids, i would expect for him not to continue if he was going to be with me, I'm not friends with my ex's but I remain civil. Meaning I don't hang out with them and they don't call me, but when I do see them we speak.

libbyft

Yeah sure - they have a very good relationship, they grew up together, married young and had 2 children. They are still good friends, which is great for their children and both are in other relationships.

If you trust your partner why would it bother you? If you don't trust your partner then you should re think your relationship!

Mildred S

only if there are kids in picture

what reason would there be otherwise ?

Answer Fairy

That depends on what you mean by contact. My husband is friends with several of his ex's. I am friends with several of mine, too. We are not sneaky about it. I am aware of the situation. I am also confident that my husband loves me.

If one of his ex's disrespected me or my house, however, her *** would be toast. If they are cool girls and I want to be friends with them, sure.

But he had one ex who seemed like a cool girl... She was over for a dinner party we had. She asked my husband to help her out to her car (she had a caserole dish and a plate). My husband helped her out. She had been annoyingly friendly throughout dinner and was making every one uncomfortable with her inappropriate comments. Then, after he had put the dishes in the trunk of her car, she pinched his butt!! Then, when he pushed her hand away and stormed back into the house, she followed him. She was telling him that she loved him. We all just stared at the nutty chick. My husband was bright red with embarrassment. He thought I'd be angry.... and I was... which is why I kicked that skank out of my house and ended up with several strands of hair left in my fists.... tee hee.

that judi

"Let" is a word that makes my blood boil! SLavery is dead.

smt

Not unless they had children together.

shirley v

he was in the army so he has lost touch of them but it wouldnt worry me if he did i know i can trust him

ann b

It is up to them not you. If you don't like it tell them how you feel but you can not rule other peoples lives.

MWestbrook

I don't "let" him do anything, he makes choices on his own. If it were a choice that I didn't agree with, I'd express my distaste and if he didn't agree we'd either come to a compromise or end it if it were something I just couldn't live with. Nothing productive can come of maintaining constant and regular contact with an ex, save hiliday cards and the like.

evelyngrz

Hell no!!!! That would be stupid.. I mean its over so why would they even want to talk to their exes.. Specially if he's my husband, that would be a no no...

Kitty

First off, I wouldn't want to be in a relationship where I would have to "let" or not "let" someone do anything. If I can't trust my partner's common sense, everything else is pointless. If my husband had a person from his past he had stayed friends with, I would have no problem with that.

doodlebug

In a relationship you have to have trust. So if I could trust that
person, they could be friends with whoever they want.
And you are not the bosses of each other, so it's not up
to you who to "LET" them see.

mimi@sbcglobal.net

For me it all depends on how close they were. If it was a girlfriend that he didn't care about then yeah, but if it was my hubby's ex-wife heck no

juanes addicion

it is stunning how many insecurities are out there...

my wife can talk to whoever she wants whenever she wants..

there is no reason for me to restrict who she can talk to ..

she is a big girl who can control herself...

whocarez

If children in void yes other then that NO!

honey

1. Are you this persons boyfriend/husband or father? Only a parent can control what his/her children do, NOT a boyfriend/husband as the one they are with is NOT their child.

2. I would LET them do whatever they want, as long as it is not abusing me in any way. They can have whoever they want as friends, even if it is exes. This is their choice, NOT yours. You are NOT her keeper or parent, so DON'T act like one. She will love and respect you more if you treat her as an equal and treat her with the love and respect she deserves.

3. You do NOT know all the details of their past relationship (if it was good or bad, etc), only the details she is willing to tell you. Who knows, maybe they make better friends than boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife. Yes, men and women CAN be friends. It is a myth that they can't, or peoples' ignorance and stubbornness if they choose not to be friends. I am good friends with my ex-husband (and no, we did NOT have kids together). Who else would know me better than someone I was with for 20 years? We get along much, much better now than we did when we were married! And if I ever meet a guy again to have a relationship with and he isn't ok with my being friends with my ex, then that guy would go because he would be a controlling S.O.B. and I will NOT put up with that. Any one with self-respect and self-love will not put up with controlling or abuse of any kind.

IF you have a problem with your girlfriend/wife having an ex as a friend (and they don't have kids), then it is YOUR problem, NOT hers. You can discuss your feelings with her about it and let her know where you are coming from, but you CANNOT control what she says and does, or whom she sees.

gabound75

I'd have to trust her. If I acted extremely jealous or possessive, it may only cause her to do it anyway.

But I'm extremely fortunate enough to really not have this problem.

nhuvi j

No#

luvinhim

i have a husband...he was friends with his ex when we first started dating...i told him the only reason exes should keep in contact is if they have kids together. it wasn't like they were besties to begin with. i didn't forbid him to remain friends with her...i just gave him my opinion on it. well, it sorta helped when i told him i wanted to reconnect with my exes on a friendly basis. he didn't like that too much...ha!

20+ years and still in-love!

1. Depends on the situation....is there kids involved? Were they friends before, or was this the ex right before our relationship.

2. Letting is not exactly the proper word, we do not own eachother in this world, accept is probably a better word for this situation.

goatslunch

Yes. I I'm having trouble with the word "Let". Sounds like you want to controll someone. Just a thought.

True relations are about trust and to "Forbid" someone form seeing or doing anything is not very trusting.
I dont "let my wife do anything, she dose what she wants when she needs to. We dont ask permission for anything we just inform each other what we are doing.

You let the kids go to the movies.

always wonderin

yeah prolly so... most of them have kids so its kinda hard not to deal with the ex's

youthpastor1955

If there are kids involved, there may not be a choice. If there aren't then either you trust her or you don't. If you don't have trust, you don't have a relationship.

Bookbabe

not unless there's kids involved

Lost

No because he or she is losing respect for you. There is a saying for fire was ashes stay and if you do not want to lose him or her don't do it. Memories come back and that is where you get cought up and you start falling and sometime the ashes can become fire. Bottom it is very disrespect ful do onto others as you would do to yourself. Before you do ask yourself would you like her or him talking to his ex girlfriend.

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