Would you work things out with your husband??

Noelle

You took him back because the first time he cheated wasn't him breaking his vow. Now he has broken his vow. He did not honor you, he did not forsake all others before you. He kinda did what he wanted to do and now you are stuck asking strangers what to do with your life. Do you want to spend the rest of your life with a man who continues to cheat? If you do then you should stay. If you don't then perhaps you should see if he is willing to go to counseling.

gingygirl

What are you trying to save? It is hard I know and things happen, but perhaps he is not as into the marriage as you??? And frankly kissing another person when you are married - making out - is wrong and you just kinda gloss over it. He has got you snowed and that is too bad. Don't let this guy keep treating you badly you deserve better, you deserve to be number one...believe, act and get it.

Barb Outhere

If he were a batter in a game he would already have two strikes against him. If you know he has cheated twice, I am sorry to say, he probably has cheated more often, but only been caught twice.
It may have been "making out" but a married man shouldn't even be doing that, with anyone other than his wife. And if he wasn't caught out, the next time it could have gone further. He is looking outside your marriage for something.
Let him know in no uncertain terms, if he wants to stay married, he better live a life as clear as glass from now on, or he's out the door. If it turns up again, its a pattern of selfishness and self indulgence, and proof that he won't change.
You should get some counseling. You two need to find out why he does this, and if he's committed to stopping it permanently, or whether its just a sign that he's just not mature enough, or committed enough, to stay married. You can't stay married on your own you know.
You have to take care of yourself.

what should you do?

invent a time machine, go back 5 years, and say 'i don't'.

chewxrazorsxyouxdouchexxx

If he hasn't stopped even after you guys got married, you need to get rid of him.

Once a cheater, always a cheater. And if he was committed and loyal like he's supposed to, he shouldn't be doing this. It's ridiculous.

And I'm sorry you have to go through this, good luck.

frustrated

Cheating is cheating, no matter when it was or how long ago it was, if he got away with it once before, he will do it again and I wouldn't trust him either, but it's your choice.

Aida

You will wonder about his infidelity for the rest of your life.

If I were in your situation, I would leave because if he did that twice, he will definitely do it again, better to end it now. My parents went through the same thing, my mom forgave, so after 29 years of marriage, my mom finally left him, do it now or else you'll end up lonely at 60, find someone who respects you- good luck

mac

Listen to your heart and in this case your dreams. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life - wondering if he's doing it again, where he's at when he's late, whose number that is on his phone? No.
Once a cheater, always a cheater and he has proven that to you.

Happyone

I met my husband when I was 23 years old and we got married 4 months ago now and i'm 25 years now. If my husband told me or if I found out that he has cheated on me I wouldn't give him a chance. In your case if he cheated on you before you guys got married and then did it again while you guys are married he isn't going to change. Regardless of being a young married couple he knows what he's doing and just can't committ to one person. I don't know if you have kids with this guy but if you don't that's a good thing and I would get out as soon as possible before a child comes into the picture.

LadyBug

Once a cheat always a cheat. Leave now while you are still young enough to find somebody who can appreciate you.

redpeach_mi

if you really want to stay with him i would suggest that you two get into some marriage counseling. it's not a cure all for marital problem, but it helps. however, he has to want to stop cheating on you. i would give him one last chance, and let him know that it is his last chance. if he does it again, leave him.

Hershey Highway road thug

Follow your dream. There is no excuse for infidelity. None. Period. End of convo.

BTW...That's short for conversation, not convict.

Rosessis

Once you allow them back they feel this gives them the OK to bang away with who they want & wherever they want !! He will do it again if he hasn't already......

Violation Valerie X

She "told you" they only made out?

You are going to believe one word this person says to you? Why?

I don't have an answer for you....my man would be on the street.

faith

Sorry my experience with cheaters is that if they get away with it once they will do it again. For me, I could never let it go. I was always thinking that he was cheating. If he didn't answer his phone, or if he was late getting home or anything like that, I automatically thought the worst. I ended up feeling insecure and it drove me crazy with worry. I ended the relationship. I decided it wasn't worth it. I deserved to be happy and have someone be faithful to me. So do you!

Elizabeth T

Dump him. He did it 2 times that you know about.
I wouldn't expect him to change.

beautiful diva

I think youve asked this once before .... he has already proven twice that he isnt capable of being faithful ... so how much more proof do you need???

wrtrchk

It's obvious that this guy hasn't learned his lesson because he is still messing around as recent as 3 months ago. You two are married now. You shouldn't have to go through a marriage feeling paranoid. It wasn't just kissing, it was betrayal and he couldn't even tell you about it. Think of the other things he may have done without confessing. You tried to save your marriage but what good is that if the other person isn't willing to salvage it?

Please get tested for STDs and find someone else who will love and appreciate you.

Survivor

My husband cheated on me for 3 years. I have been doing everything I can to save the marriage since I found out. One year later, he still have not end the relationship and tells me he hasn't made up his mind whether he wants to stay or go, and needs more time.
Because I still love him and care for him deeply, I give myself reasons to stay in the marriage. Every time he does something nice, I tell myself that he has changed and he will come back to me but I know deep down inside that nothing has changed. Even though I have forgiven him, I know I could not forget, at least not now.
I made an appointment to see a lawyer and I plan to tell him to move out because I have decided that my happiness is in my hand and no one else.
I know how you feel. I think you should find time to think about what you really want for yourself. If you are unhappy now but want to be happy, then you need to let him go. Once you make that decision, it is up to him. If and when he wants to come back and you still feel paranoid, then it is not the time to reconcile until you know you could trust him because it is not fair to him (if he really did change) or to yourself if you are unsure.
Good Luck.

SuMmEr

He has already proven twice, that he will cheat when given the opportunity. If you stay with him, you are accepting this behavior from him. I suggest you file for divorce and find a guy who respects you.

LilSunbeam

I agree with KJ........................but since you can't go back in time I would say I DON'T NOW!

ahoymty

Go to counseling with him.

Lv Dr. 4U

Don't listen to all these super self confidant women in theory "I'd leave him" most of them are talking high and mighty because they haven't experienced it yet. Work it out with him and ask him what's the deal? Dose he want to be committed or be single? Time for a sit down heart-to-heart and make your feeling known and see where he stands.

mich

i could go on about him, but i question you. everyone makes mistakes, but staying is a different story. was it easier to stay instead of going through a heartbreak to recovery? why are you willing to torment yourself for god knows how long until you trust him? (if that even happens) do you want answers? what if you have kids? do you think he'd be a good example for them? is your love really that strong? figure out why and fix it, or move on. all i know is if you're truely in love, you cant think of anyone else. sometimes people fall out...

stephanie

personally i would make him go to marriage counselling (if i wanted to stay with him). if i didn't then i would file for a divorce. He is being unfair to you.
did he tell you he cheated or did you find out from someone else?? because if it was from someone else, then who knows how many people he could be fooling around with....

s r f

just because you are married doesnt mean he wont hurt u again u really to get rid of him fast

raininonsunday

Dreams can sometimes give us a little insight into our lives - you have every reason to worry about him doing it again. You need to talk to him about your concerns and judging from his reaction take your next step. Life is too short to be unhappy. Don't let this eat at you any longer! Good luck!

Mia C

walk away because obviously you can forgive him and is only going to get worst plus you don't deserve a man that is cheating on u every time he feel like it.good luck!!

Jules

Get rid of him.

Momma

Well I would pack a bag and go stay with a friend for a while

Let him know that if he wants you back , he's gonna have to earn your trust back

M

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