Yeah me again....im hopless...and i cant figure out what it is i need answered...?
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Yeah me again....im hopless...and i cant figure out what it is i need answered...?
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how do i leave my husband? i am 22 yrs old. i got married straight outta highschool when i hardly knew him. this whole thing isnt all his fault. i had my faults as much as he did at the beginning. but it just kept getting worse and worse. i did what i could. i became what he wanted me to be but it still wasnt enough. and now hes trying to change but im not in love with him anymore. hes made his promises of "changing" over and over and over and never stuck to it. i have told him i dont trust his word anymore since hes done it dozens of times in the last 4 yrs. i told him i love him but am no longer in love with him. were both religious. though he and my church have some wild beliefs i dont agree with such as "if you divorce, God will take all blessings away from you both." i have 2 little girls. 1 and 3. and ive lost all patience with them. i love them to death but im not a good mom anymore. ive developed a temper...tho it only shows its face when i find out my husband is coming home from work(no i dont hit them, but thats what im afraid of). i just want to leave and start over. tho with the girls because hes not able to care for them. i cant leave him 2 hours with them so im not going to leave them. he hardly knows them. theyre just toys to him to come home to and play. and he has a temper. but anyway, im very sick now. i got sick from stress and was on meds for a month. then i thought i was better. he hasnt done anything too horrible in the last few months but im getting back on my meds just because ive been looking at my situation and am truly not happy and its set me off again. i cant stand him being around or touching me anymore. i dont like spending time with him anymore. i have no freedom. hes very overprotective. if im not with him or with ppl he knows as well as i do, he has a problem.
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if im not home to feed him, he has a problem i feel like i need to get away by myself for a while to clear my head. with my illness, i have anxiety attacks and worse and when i sense an argument, my body goes into shut down mode from panicking and i can black out. im in no condition right now to speak to him about divorce. so, i was thinking to leave the girls with my mom or mother in law for 3 wks. im first generation romanian-american. now, romanians are EVERYWHERE. and they all know eachother here in america. so i cant go anywhere without a very likely chance of running into someone who knows me anywhere in the states. so my trip would be out of country. heres the problem, since everyone, including my husband, are very old fashioned and religious, theyre all going to smother me with their opinions. im close to my family. i love them. but when they all find out about my trip, i will be hearing "what?! WITHOUT your husband??? you cant do that! youre a woman! not to mention the danger!
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skittles8553
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If you have reached the point that you are ready to leave him then you have to do it for you- friends and family will have to get over it as it is none of their business. You have to live with him and it is obviously too much. Think of your family, your girls... you need to do what has to be done. The church will be okay. But you do need to pray and seek God if you feel that this is not part of his will. He will lead you and guide you and help you! Be brave, decide who will get what and get the lawyers involved... the cleaner the better. Good luck! |
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SINNA
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This will be very simple, I would let him know this is not working and you need your space for a while and if you do not get that you will leave him for good. You have to do it that way because of the way he is and your family, you have to put your foot down and be firm so everyone can see how serious you are. Then I would go and pack and make your reservation to leave. |
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Shetedon
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You said it all. You are at your wits end. You do not love him anymore. You are trapped. You are stressed and need meds.
With all this in front of you it is obvious you need to breathe. Whether that means a divorce or time apart is your call. You live your live, not his/your family or friends. Only you can paint the picture you want to see.<> |
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Rx4u
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People feel the most hopeless and depressed when they feel they have no control over their own lives. So some of your anxiety/depression is based on your situation in life because he controls everything. But remember the truth, you are the only one really in control over your own life. It doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks, because they are not walking in your shoes-if you were to leave. Don't say you don't have any experience, because it sounds like you are doing office administration for his business.
You can't change him, but you can change yourself. Don't let him get to you. This is just help for right now to help you get through your days. Start enjoying the little things in life that make you happy. You need to get out more, you feel like a prisoner. Since he doesn't like you to do that, get a planner and give him a copy of the days that you are going to get your "me" time. Give him choices like are you going to be able to watch the girls for me or should I take them to famly? Then go do what you want-take a class, go to a park, spend time with friends, whatever. I can tell you are in alot of pain and turmoil right now, but little by little get your control and sense of self empowerment back. You can do it. |
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Chicken
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If you are not happy with him maybe you guys can get an annulment. |
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Trish
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T00 L0NG |
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