Young married man with marital problems... help?
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Young married man with marital problems... help?
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I'm going to try and make this as short and simple as possible... Ok, last summer I asked my wife who she knew in Knoxville as I was going through our cell phone bill and she told me it was her friend from high school. I told her I didn't think it was fair for her to have conversations with other guys (this was not the first time, nor the worst) when I can't even say "thank you" to the cashier at the grocery store, but yet she's talking to other guys on the phone... After some arguing she agreed not to talk to him anymore. I was mostly upset that she didn't tell me about it up front.
So that was last summer... Well, a few days ago I decided to hop on myspace, a very irregular thing for me to do, and noticed in my wife's comments there was some guy who left her a message beginning with "Hey beautiful..." and proceeded to say something about how if there was anything he could do to let her know. The whole "Hey beautiful..." thing just creeped/pissed me the f*** off. So, after researching I found out it was the same guy she was supposed to have quit talking to last year.
So... what do you guys think? Should I be worried or concerned?
I hope I've provided enough detail. Thanks.
Additional Details
To the last answerer "Jed":
I give my wife all the freedom she could ever dream of... She literally does not have to tell me a thing and I never ask questions AND I could care less who she talks to... but it's when that freedom is bent over backwards and anally raped is when I get upset.
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Joy
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You are right to be worried. I dont think she took your advice in not talking to him. It isnt right for her to be dishonest to you about anything, you guys are married and that is supposed to mean something. I would confront and if she lies, tell her that if she doesnt come clean now things will get much worse |
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Jenn
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I would definetly be worried. This is not a good thing. She is obviously disrespecting you and you shouldn't just ignore it. You have every right to be upset and I personally would call her on it. TRust is everything in a marriage and you obviously can't trust her. I would try for counseling but in the ens both partieshave to be comitted. Good luck to you |
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Jelly B
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I would say that you should be concerned. I think that you need to get into counseling together. |
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amare
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Yes; you should be concerned. She is hiding things from you and that is never a good sign. You have every right to be upset with the "hey beautiful" comment especially when she told you she stopped talking to that guy. She is not up to anything good. |
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massiel248
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i think you guys have trust issues serious ones. get counseling or deal with it somehow yourselves this is going to affect your marriage wether it be this guy or another. its not ok for her to be talking to other guys in intimate way but just a friend its ok |
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Douglas B
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Yes, you have. The thing is your wife has some issues that she isn't talking about and they are making her do this. Until she gets help with it she will continue doing the same thing for it is giving her some type of thrill that she isn't getting with you. |
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jenni
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Well, I may not be in the right mindset (I am going thru a divorce), but I would tell you this. If u both love each other, do not argue and talk openly. Tell her ur concerns and how worried u r. If she loves u she would tell u everything clearly. Think thru and talk to her. |
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Earth
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Sit down and talk to her about it all. If you want complete honesty from her, then you need to be honest as well (about the myspace thing). If she doesn't know what you want from her in your marriage, then she can't give it to you. Keep the lines of communication open. Being resentful and quiet about her behavior will not help either of you work through it. |
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Shannon
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Marriage is the commitment level that you end these pre-built emotional affairs.
She should cease all communication with these guys.
It is not appropriate to keep ex and lost loves at arms reach.
The first bump in the martial road these guys are instant affairs. There is no "just friends" guy; they are virtual always willing to take it beyond that.
It's not easy to let these "friends" go so try to be understanding. It is just text on a screen (for now). |
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Additional Details
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No Spam
Adult 
Gambling
Unfinished
Deception
Plagiarism
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