Help...I am confused....has he really changed?

My husband is in Marine recruit training, He left me with no money and I had to move back in with my parents. I love him but I am so confused...are relationship wasn't the best...controlling on both sides lots of yelling. I feel so good that he is gone. I ahve been hanging out with my friends. Partying. But tonight I got a sudden saddness over me. I love him and miss him, I dont know what to do. He knows how I feel. I have only sent him one letter in bootcamp telling him how angry I am with him. That was a week ago. His DI let him call home. I was mean to him on the phone. idk. The day I sent out the letter that was very mean...when I went to get the mail he sent me a letter saying how sorry he is for everything and he is changed. Should I believe him. He even wrote a letter to my parents saying sorry for the way he treated their daughter. He said that the marines are making him go to counseling and he said he wants to get counseling with me. I dont think i can take going back...but a part of me wants to. Is it normal for things to fall apart when your husband goes to recruit training or leave? Tips on staying strong...

>:(

Give the counseling a chance. The military will offer it for free. Use military one source to find a counselor or have one recommended to you from an MHC or chaplain on base. It couldn't hurt and you'll find out if its really worth it or not.

lucycaboosee

im so sorry you have to deal with this hon...i know this great forum for support for military wives and girlfriends and fiances that can relate to what you are going through...it must be so hard to put up with what you put up with...heres the link they are a GREAT group of girls..they really helped me out when i needed them the most
http://alendinghand.board-directory.com/forum.htm

Sonny

See a licensed social worker or psychologist. If you are still married to this guy, you may be qualified as a wife of a veteran under his veterans benefits.
You have some soul searching to do. In the meantime, you may want to write him an apology and then take it from there.

THOMAS

This situation is fairly wide spread. Separation military or otherwise can be and often is shattering and shared by many more people similar to yourself I guess. Only you can sort things out. If you're certain you can't take any more then that's it! But you must approach this awful problem with a strong mind and more than a degree of faith in your ability to make decisions in a cool, calm manner. It will be difficult but you and only you can make the final decision.

kreekatt

wow, that is sad enough i have tears, he had no control the day he joined the military, you are mad cause he is gone and you have no control of the situation, you may party cause you need to forget, but is obvious you care, he is gone for at least 6 mos. if not 2 years, you are going to change during that time, and he is too, especially if you are both young lovers under 25 yrs. old.

if u were harsh with him it is cause he is leaving you but that is not his, nor your fault.

if both of you want to be together it should be obvious for both of you, you likely have to work this out, i mean he will let you know if he thinks of you night and day, but after service do you have the same person, or do they have the same person, that they left.

you are the one who decides much of this, just keep writing letters at least as a friend, for support, but if you move on let him know.

hey good luck.

Kayla

What are you so mad about? I mean what did he do? anyway, They say that they enter boot-camp as boys and come out as men, as Marines. It will mature him a great deal and since you are missing him and do love him, I think you should give this new phase of your lives a chance. Everything will be different from now on I promise that. I can't say for better or worse but things have changed. When he comes out of boot-camp, you'll be living a whole new lifestyle. It could be a great thing for you two. Give it a try, that's what your heart is telling me you really want just by your question.

Write him a sweet letter if you plan on trying to work things out. Boot camp is really hard enough without having someone you love being mean.

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