I want to join the military, but...?

medici1206

Okay, speaking as a Military Brat (both parents were Navy) and a Navy Wife-- I would say stay civilian. The military life is one of sacrifice, not compromise. Chances are very good that you will miss your kids dance recitals, soccer games, graduations.You wont' be able to share in the doctor/dentist appt shuffle duties, won't be able to take your wife out for your anniversary, and likely not be able to guarantee any holidays or birthdays. The military doesn't care that you have a family. A common saying in the Navy is that "You are issued a sea-bag, not a wife." Sure they implement all these "family friendly programs" but they are in place to alleviate the stress while you are away from your family. Alleviate does not mean replace... Military life is a damn hard life, rewarding, but damn hard. REALLY hard on families and marriages, and I daresay impossible for the already established family. You have a lifestyle that you have embraced, as has your family. To chancge that as drastically as the military can and does is almost cruel to them. It's like a bait n' switch! Uncle Sam really doesn't care if you can't deploy on Tuesday because Tommy is getting his tonsils out that day. I'm sure you've heard about how the military "sacrifices" for you? Well, that isn't just life and limb. They sacrifice time spent adn memories formed with their families as well. Relationships can and often do suffer.
I know the job prospects are pretty rough right now, but the military doesn't sound like the right place for you. The military needs guys that want (100%) to do what they are doing because they believe in it and truly want to do this. There is no room for hesitations or second guesses. Lack of commitment can cost someone their life. Please hang in there, and keep casting your nets for jobs and continue to be a good family man. Enjoy your children and hold them close, because there are plenty of guys who can't do it as often as they wish they could.

Bo H.

If you fear that you'll be deployed, then i'm sorry to say, the army isn't for you.

Al Sharkston

You sound like a spoiled whiner. Maybe you should just go on welfare.

Blackmane

The military isn't for you then. Its more of a commitment than just a job.

Doc B

The military might not be for you. Deployments will keep you away from home/family.

lisab

Not really. Even the guard and reservist deploy.

seabeepo1

Grow up and cut the apron strings. The military is a very noble profession and some sacrifice is required. If you're married and have kids they can move with you and if you have to deploy somewhere they just need to deal with it. In my opinion after serving 23 years it makes you stronger and closer knit. You appreciate each other more.

TedEx

It';s "either, or""." You take it or leave it.

If your religious beliefs override the requirements of the Army, then, please, don't waste your time or the Army's time.

Take the bull by the horns and join as a 11B. They will probably station you in a peaceful, remote area.

goddess

Sounds like you want the secure paycheck without having to do all the work.
It also sounds like the military is not the right job for you. Try working for Government Service or as a Contractor for the military.

Please don't join the military "because you need a job." Your fellow soldiers, sailors, airmen, or marines would deserve much more. It is a very demanding lifestyle, and requires dedication. If you are as devoted to your family as you suggest, it could also cause strain. Your unwillingness "to leave the state" makes it difficult as well. Continue your search for other employment, and good luck. As a vet, I know I wouldn't have wanted to serve with someone who was looking at the service as just a job opportunity.

Angel SA

Joining the military on this times or any times for sure you will be leaving your family for duty tours. After one joins a service one doesn't have a say on what the service wants one to do.

GOD BLESS AMERICA!

KCH

The military just isn't for you. You HAVE to deploy. You're useless to the military if you are not deployable.

Look for a job in your stateif you want a job in your state.

Seth

The military goes all over the place. If you don't want to leave your family, then don't join. This is true for Active Duty, Reserves, and the Guard.

But, if you don't want to join for religious reasons, you could become a chaplain for the military if you want to use your beliefs as a job.

The Mrs.

I am not putting you down, but there are going to be deployments regardless of which branch you go in to. If your marriage is strong enough it will survive. You mentioned divorce rates and I agree with you on that one, divorce rates are even higher in military families. It is a hard life and no one will lie about that, especially the spouses. My husband has done 3 deployments and we are still going strong. I completely understand how hard it is to leave your family, but that is the life in the military. If that is a deal breaker for you, then the military is not the way to go. Best of luck.

||G0NAVY||

i agree with seebeep

AFwife

then don't do it, your are NOT going to live in your home state, its the military remember? its not a 9-5 job, you have to sacrifice for your country to be in the military and so do your family members, i have to every day by living far away from my family and dealing with my husbands deployments but i do it because i love my husband and my country, the military doesn't care about your religious beliefs or where they want to move you, so either join full hearted or don't!

Whatcha Gonna Do

yeah it's hard, huh? i don't want to leave but i know that the military will give me all kinds of great skills that i can use as a police officer.

i don't know what your beliefs are but i just pray about it. i make sure that im doing what God wants, even though it may be hard on me...i know he has reasons for what ever he tells me to do. and i feel like the military is the way i should go.

Mrsjvb

nope. you have ZERO guarantees.

for one, you cannot get station of choice in an initial enlistment contract. that is only an option for those re enlisting. you will go where you are sent, and you have little say in it.

two. YOU WILL DEPLOY. PERIOD. no ifs, ands or buts about it. YOU WILL SPEND TIME AWAY FROM FAMILY. end of subject.

if you do not want to do anything and everything the military requires of you, then do not enlist.

Sherri E

I have to say that the military is most definitely not the way for you to go. I joined the Army National Guard in 2000. One weekend a month, 2 weeks in the summer, correct? WRONG! I was activated 3 times in the 6 years I served. I am very proud of my service and I was happy to do my part.

I am not trying to put you down, but I don't think the commitment of the military is for you. When you join, you most likely would be stationed elsewhere. The only way around that is to join the Army National Guard within your state and apply for an AGR job (fulltime national guard member); however, those jobs are not always easy to get and can be highly competitive. Also, just as others have stated, deployment is almost a guarantee. My fiance is AGR in the Army National Guard and is currently on his 3rd deployment since 2002, and he still has at least 3 more years that he will continue to serve. It can be a huge strain on a family, but I love and support my soldier and I am so proud of him!

The military really should be a commitment you want to make. The benefits can be good or even great: decent pay, great benefits, college assistance, 20 year retirement, etc.; however, sacrafices must be made: deployments, missing family things, long days sometimes, etc. I can tell you that I hated to hear soldiers during deployments whine about how they only joined for the college money. Anyone who joins the military beyond 9-11 should have in their head that they will deploy at least once and very possibly multiple times during their service.

Please, only join if you really want to be a soldier, protect our country, and have your battle's back! I will not put anyone down that chooses not to be a soldier; it isn't for everyone. There are many things out there that I myself wouldn't want to do.

Best of luck to you in finding the path that is right for you and your family.

keithhillrb

no matter what branch of the military you join, there is ABSOLUTLY NO guarantee that you will be stationed in one certan place......and talking to your recruiter is NEVER goin to help because when you go to the MEPS (military entrence processing station) right before you sign your contract you go into a room with a social worker like person who asks you if your recruiter has guarnteed that you will be stationed in one certian geographic......and if they do they can get in a lot of trouble...........Just do it.......join......think about it this way......you serve for 4 years active duty and 4 years reserve and during your service you go to college and then when you get out u have a degree in somthing and can move where ever the hell you want lol

Gray Wanderer

Coast guard if there are any Coast Guard stations in your state.

q2007lhs

My sister is about to join the Army and she enlisted for reserves so she gets to stay at home except for every other weekend when she has to go to her station. She's in culinary. My husband is in the Marines and he has a desk job; which I love, but we had to move 23 hours away from everyone. So, if you choose to enlist make sure you talk to your recruiter and let him know you want to stay where you live now.

Average white guy

It all depends upon what your talent is. ( chances are more than likely you will be going to the "sandbox" if you join); but if there is a serious issue back home with your family, depending on the severity the military may let you return for a short while. I know some Marines whose jobs actually kept them from going on tour. But it all boils down to what Uncle Sam wants you to do. If you are concerned about staying close to home try the Army, but if you want shorter deployments by about 3-4 months try the Marines. If you want to sit around all day try the Air Force, and if you want to do basically all of the above go into the Navy. Or escape them all by going into the Coast guard

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: