Military People Help. Did i cross the line?

mariner31

I think your actions were correct. I'm ex-Navy and had the same issue with one of my "kids". We had no idea anything was wrong until the wife finally screwed-up the courage to go to the Ombudsman.

She had waited longer than you... he had already passed the point of "pressure points" and had broken her wrist.

He had troubles... did some time in brig, got a TON of counseling, and finally came to understand it was HIS problem, and NOT his wife's. Thankfully they actually stayed together and are happily married to this day.

I can't promise you the same happy ending... but I'm thankful you sought help before your husband does time for putting you in hospital or worse.

I wish you luck and happiness.

The Scorpion

No, that's a dangerous situation and needs to be dealt with. What he did was not "military moves." That's not something taught to soldiers, that's just abuse and he has no right to do it.

Crosseyed Kitty

No. You did the right thing. He could become a danger to you.

Mary S

He sounds like he does need help. You did the right thing. Don't let him hurt you. It's always okay to reach out for help.

Common Sense

Nope..
You did not cross the line.

DOOM

If he's physically restraining you, I'd have him arrested.

Baking MasterÂ®

you did the right thing. my grandma on my dad's side had to do the same thing.

marie

I'm not a military person but I am a person with a lot of common sense. If he does not want you to seek help why is he treating you as if you were the enemy? His using his training to hurt you is so wrong! Walking on eggshells around him is only making him think you can manage to live like that all the time. You need to leave if he can't straighten out, because if he isn't trying to get help you need to do what you need to do to survive.

Mercadies2000

It's physical abuse and he could hurt you bad sometime. He needs help and you are doing whatever it takes to get it. You didn't do wrong at all. He no doubt has PTSD and once he gets treatment he may become your loving sweet hubby again! Good luck to you both and I hope in the end you will have a happy long marriage.

nesescott

He needs to get help before it gets out of hand. You did the right thing. I'm sorry to hear that he's not coping. Seeking help from family advocacy shouldn't ruin his career. Now, if he doesn't seek help and does something, then he WILL get in trouble. It's better for him to seek help than to wait until it's too late. Of course, I'm coming from an Air Force perspective, but the military that's what the program is for...HELP.

Melissa P

It's always ok to reach out for help. It is true that the military is required to report things like this to his commanders (they don't want to send unstable people into war) however, if he was treating you this way then he needs to seek help. In my opinion, he's lucky you didn't go directly to his first shirt yourself.

RHD100

You helped him by telling his superiors. I guarantee you, though, he has two choices, help himself & you & seek counseling or face jail time if he continues to hurt you. You took the first step, now it is up to him.

larry m

I am an Air Force Vet. No you didn't cross the line.

Your husband needs help whether he thinks he does or not.

Trying to be supportive is one thing, but being allowed to be abused is not an acceptable form of support.

PTSD is a very serious medical condition, so please make sure you take it very seriously. Your safety is most important.

trooper (canine bad citizen)

You did the right thing...he needs help. I just returned from Iraq, and I would never think of laying a finger on my wife..not because of my career, but because I love my wife. Now..I am not saying that he doesn't love you...he just has to go work through some issues. and for your own safety, you need to have a back up plan in case he does it again. make sure that when he gets in those moods, you leave for a while before he gets out of hand. talk to his leaders about what is going on. to many spouses in our army are becoming statistics....good luck...

jamie s

I agree with Brian B, maybe you should separate yourself from him for a little while and try to make him understand your feelings.

winemkr

Get rid of the undisciplined piece of garbage. Hopefully the military will to.

jkah33

yeah! let him deal with his own problems you should stop pushing his button and makign him snap

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