My fiance leaves for the marines on Sept. 18th.?

Bob

One of the things families are told in the Marine Corps is, "If the Marine Corps wanted you to have a family, they would have issued you one." It is possible for you to keep your family strong though. There are many organization on Marine bases for family support when your spouse is deployed (this includes if the spouse is female). They just don't tell you about them. Just remember that you married him and he married you. That should be the basis of your relationship. Keep strong in your faith and keep in touch. If he gets deployed, he may not be able to answer you in a timely manner, so don't get discouraged. It can be done, you both just need to keep strong. Tell your fiance "Semper Fi!"

David R

Having spent six years active duty in the Marines, having done three long term deployments (two floats - six months each and the first gulf war - five months), numerous shorter deployments, etc., I feel very qualified to answer this.

Yes, your relationship can most certainly endure. Your fiance is getting ready to embark on the most positive life-changing experience a person can undertake. The Marines' motto is Semper Fidelis - always faithful. It is more than a saying, it is a way of life. The Marine Corps is about honor, tradition, and service. There is no more noble calling.

That having been said, you are about to embark on a nail-biting, nerve-wracking experience of your own. He will write to you about how horrible it is, how much he misses you and your daughter, how he regrets those things he may have done, etc. He means it, but he doesn't. He will endure. When he returns, you will not know what to make of him at first. He has changed. Now, he will be his own person, his own man, your Marine.

In my many deployments, I heard families talk about those cheating Marines with women in every port, etc. It's horse hockey. The very large number of Marines I knew and watched were faithful to their spouses and girlfriends. It was a very rare Marine that deviated and he was not idolized for his prowess, he was ignored or chastised for his lack of fidelity to that woman.

Now, I feel compelled to say this. Base housing can be a trip. At Camp Lejeune, there was a tremendous amount of rumors as to how the wives acted when we deployed. They'd dress up and head to the clubs. I cannot say that is true, but I do know that there were a lot more spouses cheating than there were Marines. If it's not in your heart, don't let it in. As to all the nay-sayers determined to make you question your relationship, politely thank them for their advice and tell them that your Marine will remain Semper Fi.

cheersaroundtheworld

When I served I saw some good guys slip as did the, "good girls" back home. You can be assured of one thing. If your husband sees combat it will change him, however this does not mean that what is between the two of you has to change, but as a general rule people do tend to drift apart....So what I am saying to you is that there are no guarantees, but the two of you are going to have to both put in a little extra effort to make things work as a military relationship is anything but A typical. Remember a relationship is a two way street and as long as the both of you keep that in mind the chances are more in your favor. Ultimately this is a question that the only you and your husband can explore and decide the outcome.

Semper Fi and God Bless.

don't let the doubt in your mind grow , just believe what u feel and trust him and believe on him that he will coming back for you and your daughter

vail2073

once you're married, the chances go up as long as you both try. If even one of you gives up slightly, it will probably go down hill. However, YOU must accept that he might be gone for up to a year on deployments while you are at home guarding the kid, paying the bills, and growing on your own. When we deployed, out of 136 Marines in my company, 72 were married. When we came back after 6 months to a year,out of 72, i'd day about 60% got divorced withing 3 months of being back. WHile on base, both of you will be fine. Money might be a little tight at first, but you'll work. Hard times is when he goes on deployment. The question then becomes, will you wait for him and will you be loyal to him? Sorry to say, but that is how things are in the Corps. Again, if you to work on it and stay with it, you'll be fine and do great. If you can't or he can't, you'll fail. Talk to eachother, help eachother, comfort eachother, and most importantly, DON"T argue about money and DON"T go to be angry.

whisperofsmoke36

My hubby was gone for 18 mnths and we made it...email me anytime u need to talk..whisperofsmoke36@yahoo.com/i will try help u through it!

hell_in_a_handbasket

yes they do last and once his basic and advanced training is over you and your daughter can live with him in on base housing, you will have medical care, food and schools on base too. one thing though you will see great changes in him so don't get worried, they will be good for the both of you, he may seem distant at first but once he settles back into a life with you and your child things will settle down. one thing though i am sure you have to be officially married though and many choose the day after graduation or family day to do it, small ceremony etc. perhaps you can marry before he goes? but one thing for sure you tell him and this goes for you too, thank you so much for your sacrifice and committment to this country and its people, you will find some that disrespect you and him but the majority honor you and thank you from the bottom of our hearts because without you sacrificing your and your child's time and he his we would not be this great nation...be safe, we wish you well and may the weeks ahead pass quickly.....

NONAME

I don't know what the percentages are hon, but I won't deny that it takes a lot of work to nurture your marriage as a military family.

Get plugged in and take advantage of all your support networks in the military. Keep yourself involved and busy so you are not left longing for your husband while he is absent.

You are taking on a huge commitment, not only to your husband and baby, but to your nation. Thank you. Without women like you, supporting our men in uniform, we wouldn't be the nation that we are.

Believe in him and believe in your marriage and together you will be the best parents you can be, all while serving your Country well.

God bless

LoveMyInfantryMan

yes it will last i have a fiance in the 3rd infantry division for the us army..hes stationed in Ga...and we make our relationship work..you as the soon to be military wife..has to accept and understand that if he doesnt call..like he said he will or when he says hell call..he's probally busy..there is a good reason why.Also you have to have trust.Trust that hes doing nothing wrong.Im not going to lie your relationship may change...as did mine...he may call everynight for awhile..and talk for hours..but then eventually...he could not call as faithfully...and may not talk as long.At first when this happened to me i was worried..But trust me theres nothing to worry about if your in love it will last..Good luck..and ill have you in my prayers.

Military life can be a strain on a new marriage. One of the things that will help if you get to live on base is that there will be lots of other families in the same situation. Young married life and starting a new career is difficult regardless of the career. Both of you working at it will give you the best chance.

deadmanbro001

of course, if u 2 make it last

Balner

whether or not the two of you last all depends on you. you have more of an oppurtunity to meet someone than he does.

oneusualone

It sounds like the two of you have established a committed relationship...5 years and a daughter?...proof that it's more than just puppy love. Of course, nobody knows your relationship better than you two...if you've had 5 bumpy years and felt like things were going in a sour direction then this move may not be a good one. Honestly, he's going to be away from you and vise versa...both of you are going to want eachother and neither will be near the other. That's the worst part of it. Hopefully the two of you have discussed this matter amongst yourselves before now...it's a big step and will change both of your lives for sure. When he's done, and the two of you have been relatively faithful, you'll be stronger than ever!
Guaranteed

auntjewly

god bless this man for joining honey, i'll be praying for you two to be strong......................

GOMER PYLE 76

the military has a 75% divorce rate but if you make a commitment and can stick with it "in good times and in bad" I think you will do just fine

Mr.No-It-All

it'll be up to you to make it last.... females are usually the ones that go mess'n around first.....
havent you ever seen that movie, Jarhead ?

Negrodeus

I hope he wins the 21 gun salute.... and they send you a flag.... then you can ask yourself was it worth it......

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