My recruiter told me its best to stay single while in the military?

travis m

Well he's right about one thing, never marry someone from overseas.... unless you actually want to be host to some chick who just wants her green card.

If you get married or not is your choice though (and... the choice of whatever poor girl you ask...lol) Do whatever suits you. Know before you get into it that relationships and marriages are more difficult in the military than they are back home. You always have the added stress of deployments, not seeing each other for months or a year at a time. Coming home from long deployments is incredibly tough on relationships. Your going to think "i'm still the same guy I was when I left, we can just pick up where we left off".... but neither of you are the same people after a year apart. You've grown up a lot after a year overseas, whether you see it in yourself or not, and she's probably gone through a lot too... and the two of you have to adjust to the "new yous".

Still, for all the rough spots... lots of military families stick it out and work through the added stress and have long happy marriages. Do what you feel is right, don't let some knucklehead recruiter who doesn't even know you make your decisions for you.

Tkr2good

It is all up to you and the person you marry. I am not sure what branch you are in but marriage can be difficult if you are gone alot.

But, don't rush it. Enjoy your single life and go overseas!!!

That depends. Some Soldiers don't get married out of love but for benefits and a ticket out of the barracks. I can tell you some horror stories about guys who got married days before going to Iraq for the extra pay; only to have them come back with their bank account emptied out and their wife several states away pregnant with another man's baby.

I won't tell you not to get married at all because there are good women out there who won't screw you over. There are people out there who got married while in the military and stayed happily married for years. But if a girl is willing to marry you after you only knew her for a few weeks and she insists on unrestricted access to your accounts then you need to watch out.

cordeliabrainiac

No, not dumb.

I think its best if you get married for the right reasons, to the right person, at the right time (when you are both ready)....unfortunately, the military provides plenty of opportunities for that not to happen, ie. you meet a cool girl. . . right before you PCS overseas, etc. so you get married but you rushed into it, she turns out not to be as great as you originally thought, youre not as great as she thought, etc, etc

Pet

it takes a strong relationship to be an army family

the single soldiers i know go out and party a lot but they often tell my husband how lucky he is to come home to a pretty wife and hot dinner :)

it goes either way, depends on yourself as a person.

helper

Not at all. I think it's great to have a support system at home - someone who cares about you, prays for you, writes to you all the time, sends you care packages, etc etc etc.

Obviously if you already have someone that you're engaged to, getting married would be fine. If you just pick someone off the street, I don't think it's a very good idea.

Jennifer K

He's an idiot. Sometimes it's EASIER to stay single while in the military. Divorce rates can be higher because a military spouse has to make several sacrifices. They might have to spend months alone and if you have children and you are deployed it is pretty much like they are a single parent while you are gone. They also have to be willing to move around the world if the military changes your assignment. There are financial benefits to being married in the military: your housing allowance is higher and you actually get seperation pay if you are deployed overseas or otherwise not co-located with your spouse for 30 days or more. The financial benefits are minimal and shouldn't be used as a basis for getting married. I've known several career soldiers, sailors, and airman who are happily married.

bubbles_02

I have to agree and disagree with that.

Yes its hard to have a relationship while in the military. Ex: Time spent away from eachother. More chance of cheating. Stress being away. and all.

HOWEVER I am very biased because Im going out with a Marine =] If you find a girl like me who is totally willing to wait for you and geniunely cares about you then you are ok. But there are several girls out there that would lie, cheat, or stab you in the back. It really depends on who you have the relationship with and never rush into marriage.

To me I think life is too short to put off something you really want. I live for today and that means dating the guy Im crazy about even if its hard. You just really have to decide for yourself. Good luck and thanks for serving!

DOOM

I haven't tried the married thing yet, but from what I can tell, it's certainly easier to be single in the military.

Jared

most of the time when your dating someone and you get deployed they will **** jodie.

USN ENS

Other answers are valid too, however he really doesn't want you to get married what you are under is charge (in DEP) because it creates more paperwork for him.

Waiting for September

Well you probably wont get to spend any time with the wife, and everyone knows divorce rates are pretty high in the military. Plus you never know what they are doing while you are deployed. And if you do divorce, there goes your life, and half of everything you own. But if you do decide to get married then get a prenuptial agreement so your not at a complete loss when divorce comes around.

mones_mom

i would say stay single, y not? if you do have a good change at being deployed well you have to think of the reality... you gonna get married just to let the poor girl get widowed or God forbid leave a kid fatherless? sorry to get so.. harsh i guess you could say but this is the reality of the situation. if you do fall in love then by all means follow your heart. but how long are you signing up for? 3 or 4 years? i mean it'll take you at least a year to find a decent girl cuz there are MANY hoes in the military, it's ridiculous. but there are plenty of great girls too. but when you find her i'm sure you'll want to be in a long relationship before you wed right? so i say don't even worry about it until you find that girl you want to marry. you have quite awhile anyway so don't stress and forget everything i just typed! lol

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