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Quitting Army during Basic training?
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Quitting Army during Basic training?

My Fiance' Joined the army, But halfway through basic he's regreting it. ( He's not the type tp be away form his friends and family for a long time) A week ago the drill sergants said if you don't wanna be here then quit. Well he's doing just that, he's going to each of his sergants and informing them of his choice. But the seem to be playing around with him, One told him he CANNOT quit. But then the next day ask's him if he's had a change of heart yet. Then an even higher officer whom he hasn't even approached yet, asked him the same thing. And he said he still wanted to go home, so now there going to have a talk soon.
If he keeps his stance on this will they have to let him go? I'm trying to figure out everyhting I can for him, so He knows what he needs ot say to get out. ( One woman has already quit and gone home, so it IS possible to do so)


I would encourage him to at least try to make it through basic. Nearly everyone has a hard time at basic..being away from family and friends is always tough at first and during basic there is so little time or access to call, email or even relax. Things will change as he goes to tech school..more freedom, more ways to contact those he loves.

Yes, there are people who enlist and then find out the military is not for them. But if his biggest issue is being homesick, and he basically likes the rest of what he is doing, help him stick it out. If he is generally unhappy, he should arrange to talk to his TI formally. Yes, people can be let go for failure to adjust (that is the term they use). It may take time. The supervisors and officers will want to talk with him extensively to find out what is going on. Your boyfriend will need to be sure this is what he wants...and he should know that any signing bonuses he recieved will need to be returned (and since he didn't even finish basic, he will need to return the full amount). If he has spent it, they can garnish his civilian wages and will take his tax returns until it is paid back.

You, as a girlfriend, should encourage him to continue. Tell him how proud you are of him. They have to play games with him to make sure he can get through the stresses of battle w/o freaking out or quitting on his brothers.

If he quits it will follow him the rest of his life. It's only the army... it's hard, but it's not THAT hard! It's not the Marines. The games are all part of it. He has to dig down and see what he's got.

He can not quite. The Drill Sergeants will sometimes ask that so the weak recruits show themselves, then they get extra attention.

The only legal way out is to either fail out, get a medical discharge, or have some sort of family issue that causes them to kick you out(they will investigate it so do not lie). With the war I do not know if you can fail out today though.

Have him stick it out. Once he is done the Army is a lot different from basic training.

over a lifetime, a couple of weeks in boot camp is not a big deal, people go into the military and in boot camp they will cut the apron strings from mama.......
if he is halfway through... its not that much longer.....
and you know what? he will develop freinds in the army, but if he keeps up this attitude the drill sergeants will make it alot tougher on him

You don't get to quit military service the way you might quit civilian employment. Every service member receives what is known as a discharge (Honorable, Dishonorable, General, General under Honorable conditions, Uncharacterized, etc.)

Once you sign a contractual agreement with a branch of the armed forces you pledge a specific period of time in which you agree to serve and are bound by law to honor that agreement like any legal contract. However, as with anything in this world, there are exceptions...as well as consequences. Anything other than an Honorable discharge can severely affect your future employment and lock you out of various benefits that are associated with federal service.

Below is the web site of the Office of the Staff Judge Advocate for Fort Levenworth. It has links to the various types of Chapter related discharges that one can recieve and the requirements that must be met for the person to receive it.

he's gonna be a good provider for you and your kids when the going gets tough.

Ok when I went to BCT last Yr we are were asked who wants to go home by the Drill Sgts and of course you had a few to raise their hand then response to that was "Noone made you sign your contract".

Yes there was about 3 people who were sent home in my Company 1 due to a medical illness (serious) that she wasnt aware of , 1 who went AWOL the entire time and the other was an Armywife who played crazy because she couldnt deal with being a Soldier. Even when I sprang my ankle and went to sick call the PA asked me on the chart 1 through 5 tell me what you want.. 1 was go home,2 was find out whats wrong,3 was find out whats wrong and return to training, and cant recall 4 or 5 of course I wanted to find out what was really wrong and return to training, what I suggest you telling him is that he joined the Army for a reason and to hang in there things will get better ( I promise).
of all the people who were sent home from my company they were all females, and the ywere sent home 2 weeks before we graduated meaning youll leave faster when you finish your training.

There is no Quitting in the Army , and from what I seen first hand hes better off finishing his BCT ,Ait is much much different than Bct, when I went to AIT in my Company we didnt have Drill SGTS, things were way less stressful.. you and his family need to encourgae him to stay and graduate.. if I at 34 can go to BCT and get a go one everything my first time around , leaving my 3 children and my husband (who is active duty) behind , so can your boyfriend.
I wont lie I cried some nights because I missed my family but I knew in the end it would pay off, and it did , to have my children see me in uniform and tell me how proud they were/are of me made my whole world.
To have my husband who is an NCO brag to his Soldiers about what I was doing gave me such joy.
With all thisbeing said, my husband requested to deploy 3 weeks before I graduated from BCT and left week 3 into my AIT...Your Boyfriend can make it through this with love and lots of support.

Good Luck to you all!

John Paul
You cannot quit the army. Once in basic training it is the Training officer ability to break down all resistance that makes the team stronger. The ability to take orders with out question is a life saver. A dishonorable discharge will hang over his head for the rest of his life. Encourage him to stick it out and do what the DT sergent want's him to do. Be strong get in shape take orders. And most of all forget the outside world for now he is (US Army). And it is kind of weak of him to walk out.

He can technically leave the military anytime within the first 6 months of service. Its not necessarily a loophole per se, but it kind of is. Basically he has to inform his command that he is unable to become accustomed to the military way of life. He will have to do tons of interviews with a ton of different people (including psychologists). He would be done with basic training waaaaay before this was done though.

He could always tell them he likes doing it with dudes, he'd be gone in a heartbeat

Izzy N
Didn't he sign a LEGAL CONTRACT?

Medical discharge is the only thing I can think of.

If he is halfway through, that means he only has a month left. He has already done all the hard stuff. He should just stick it out. He will regret getting out.

I don't think he can get out of the Army by just saying he wants out. He has already signed the contract.

Yeah, he can quit if that is what he wants to do. All he has to do is refuse to comply with the orders and directives given him by his trainers and superiors. Do not be insubordinate, don't curse or swear, just refuse to go to training. Refuse to fall out to formation and refuse to stand at attention.

When asked by any of the drill sergeants or officers what he is doing he should simply and politely reply "With all due respect to your rank, I found that I was mistaken about being in the military and I quit. I cannot continue to subject myself to this process." This is going to cause his chain of command to flip out and yell at him like crazy, but tell him to stick to it. Don't bend one bit, just be polite and calm to everybody he encounters.

He'll be pulled out of his training company in a matter of days and they will begin outprocessing him for discharge, a General Discharge. Mind you that he will never be permitted to enlist into any other branch of the Armed Forces and he will never be employed by any department or agency of the federal government as a result of this behavior.

Wow...... so close to be able to provide so much for you and your future family. Everybody misses friends, family and girlfriends during basic. That is what basic is........ it makes you think out of the box, become an adult and see the world as it is.

As others said you need to stop encouraging him. If he gets out he will inside always regret it in many ways. One being he will always feel like less of a man. And yes he could get out eventually but the process will be much harder than just finishing. And as others have said...... if he gets discharged job wise he will NEVER get anywhere.... really.

Sounds a little immature to me. What are you going to do when you're married and he decides he's rather be with his friends and goes home to mamma?
Has he ever completed anything ?
I wouldn't have the guts to face friends if I couldn't make it through Army bootcamp.

yes it is, frankly the drill sergeant is really just gaging his response as to how authentic he is in his statement.if he truly wants to get out he can,and the d.s will start the appropriate paperwork for the discharge. many of the former d.s's i have encountered in my time on active duty have said that new recruits will sometimes just gripe,and don't mean anything by saying they want to go home,or its just simply the feeling of the moment.obviously he's still in red phase and the d.s is going to be hardest on everyone at that time,and they progress thru basic the d.s's lighten up gradually,frankly the last week of basic you can pretty much do what ya want since they consider you trained and see no reason to be in your *** anymore. it is possible your fiance' may also just have a ahole d.s. he may also just simply not be cut out for military life,and if that is the case he can be discharged

His best choice is to talk to a Chaplain! It is possible to get out! There is many different ways, he just has to find the loop holes! I don't think he should quit! He should have went in exspecting it was not going to be easy! He needs to toughen it out! It's not so bad after you finish the training! I think you need to inspire and motivate him!

Who watches the Watchmen?
Sweetheart if you can get him to stay and tough it out that would be great, what they are not telling him right now is that if he gets out he will get an "other than honorable" discharge and that will follow him for life, it will make it almost impossible for him to get a good job. It is only a few more weeks I am sure he can do it, plus in most cases they will send him to another "holding" unit while they process his papers and it will be hell and take forever even longer than it would to graduate basic! I did 4 years in the Army and am now a military wife, it is a beautiful life and I know once he gets though his training he will be fine.
Talk him into staying it will do him a lot of good, you have to be very supportive! Good luck!

Yes, if he "says the right things" he can get out. But, I would strongly discourage that. If he does get out, that will follow him for the rest of his life. It will show up on every background check. He will have to explain why his resume ( for future job prospects) shows that he was in the army for only a few short weeks.

This could be very embarrassing for him.

Encourage him, he CAN make it through, and that would be best for him at this point. After arriving at basic the only way to get out ( except serious injury) is shameful and will follow him home.

Mom of two female Army soldiers
He needs to try to stick it out. He will feel so proud of himself when he gets thru basic. It is something that could be called the challenge of your life. Both of my daughters have grown and changed so much for the better. The pride in themselves and the feeling of accomplishment is overwhelming. But if he does not stick it out if could eventually ruin his chances of things later in life. Basic is hard and depends on his MOS AIT could be harder. But it is worth all of it. Does he want to be the best of the best or a quitter. Lifetime commitments or just a couple of years can make or break a person. Army or Marriage you can not always do what you want just because it feels good. Maybe just having everyone mail him letters and packages could make a difference. People (family and friends) can make a huge difference just by letting him know that they support him.

Hi...I'm a marines wife. My advice to you is to quit encouraging him to quit. You are his support system. You need to encourage him and tell him that he can accomplish this. I know you want him home...but he is already halfway through...he will not be sent home. So don't get your hopes up. The only time he will be let go is if something happens to him medically or if something happens to a family member. And they always investigate...so don't lie. Or he could punch one of his drill sergeants in the face...but I wouldn't recommend this because more than likely they would whoop him before they let him go. Does he really want to get a dishonorable discharge though? That stays with you for life.

He will not get out by telling people that he wants out....by doing this he is only asking for attention. He needs to start blending in more.

If he does quit...he is going to regret it. Sorry but it's true. I know it's hard for you to...but be more supportive of him sticking it out. It will help him a lot more. Missing your friends and family is a normal part of military life. Everybody feels this way when they go to basic.

I joined when I was 17 years old. When I got to Basic, I was scared and missed home. But I joined and had the backbone to fulfill my obligation. I ended up spending 21 years in the Army, and after going halfway through Basic I knew I could make it.
He needs to step up and be the man he thought he was when he joined up. I like your comment in parenthesis "One woman has already quit and gone home..... hmmmm.
Sounds to me that your "man" will quit anything once the going gets a little rough. Good luck with your relationship.

If he doesnt like to be away from home, why did he join the Army? I guess he just wanted the quick ship bonus? Man what a wuss...

I would encourage him to stick it out...he's already halfway through. If basic is nine weeks, he only has a month or so left
and then he gets a break.
He really has already done the hard part. Learning a new language [ARMY WAY]...is over- now to polish those new skills.

Don't be a quitter.

Homer J Marley
Convince him to stick it out. He'll regret quitting in the long run.

I don't know for sure but I think you can with the service being volunteer

He sounds like the kind of pansy @$$ we don't want in the Army anyway. He will regret it in the long run and unless you encourge him you will regret it as well. I have been in the Army for 18 years and there have been good times and bad times just like anywhere else he will find a job,

It's really up to you to encourge him and make him stick it out because it's worth it in the long run. Good Luck

My advice is to find a new boyfriend....

What a wuss.

He has a legal right to abrogate any contract he's currently involved with! Anyone that tells him otherwise is offering the wrong advise to him! He can leave the military at any time,although it will be easier if he does so closer to the beginning! I think taking this position shows that he has more grit than all the DI's from the beginning of time! After all this is a totally voluntary military and if you no longer want to volunteer then how can they want to keep you there?

Mickey Mouse
Yes basic training is hard, you feel like your in hell, and other things however once you graduate. AIT will be little better, some sargeants at AIT will still call you names or at least the ones I had at Fort Leonard Wood 58 th transportation Charlie Company was even on graduation day. You have some free time after you get back to the barricks from MOS training unless you are on the list of people who did not pass your run time, which I did not the first time. When and if the sargeant says you can go on free time which you can spend in the barricks playing video games if you have a PSP, watch a movie if you have a portable DVD player either in a lap top or just a portable DVD player. You still do PT in the morning 5 days a week and then you eat breakfeast, go get cleaned up, into your ACUs and any gear have to wear, and go to formation. Then you go to catch the transport to transport you to where you will be training. Free advice when they say to get outside in formation do it or you will be doing push ups. AIT goes by so fast that you will be back to your family and friends unless you go active duty; if so there is a chance you can qualify to go home for 2 weeks working with the recuriters and also be able to see your friends and family. Personally and I am going to be honest, there were times that I wanted to quite at basic training, but with encouragement from friends I made it through even all or most of the drill sargeants at Fort Benning Bravo 247 B that were there when I was in 11-10-2010 to 02-03-2011 said that I would not make it and I proved them wrong. After AIT on 08-15-2011 I was honorable discharged for medical reasons even though I wanted to stay in. For a long time I had regreted being discharged even though it was out of my hands.

Srew you
My son just quit ! His father and I are quite proud of him ! Opting not to come home in a coffin ! Say whatever you want. He's my son!! Not the friggin governments son..we never indulged in food stamps or free rent..We never had babies we couldn't support..It's not an embarassment to us..He opted life instead of death for a country who hates middle class..How are the gas prices ??

i hope you aren't looking at me
I went through 9 weeks of OSUT at fort benning when I realized that this shit just wasn't for me. I had the highest qual scores, I was undefeated in combatives, I had no problems what so ever. I don't even have much of a family to miss but I grew up in boston and I can't take orders or fight for a dumbass worthless war. So I quit. there are a few ways to get out. claim that you can't adapt to the military lifestyle but good luck with that...the CO would have your nuts AND wouldnt let you do it. he could also go to CHMS and claim that he's having mental issues and breakdowns...they would recomend him for either a chap. 11, a medical chap. 5-11, or a med chapter 5-17. the difference between the 2 meds is if you can prove it was a condition existing prior to enlisting or if one was brought on because of the training. the way i left was simple, refused to train. I got a chapter 11 and in 6 months it completely leaves your record. its an uncharacterized discharge, and within 6 months not only will it be off his record but he will be able to re enlist if he so chooses.

Proud mom
My son was injured during the first week of boot camp at Fort Benning. After a medical evaluation it was determined that he had prior injuries that were missed from a motorcylce accident he had 6 months prior to leaving for boot camp. My son's Capt. called me and told me my son would be sent home. That his physical condition was just not what it needed to be. That was almost 5 weeks ago...I have heard nothing since. I have spoken to my son 2 times, and he says his paperwork has been completed for almost 3 1/2 weeks and they have taken back all of his gear, except for on pair of each..t-shirt, pants, boots, and socks. Even his water pack. That happened more than a week ago. He is still with his platoon. At this point being targeted as a quitter, etc. He is not a quitter, he is devastated that his dream of serving our country has been shot to heck. I am wondering just how much longer will they keep him there before sending him home. Seems a little sill that they would continue to pay him. When he is not doing anything but sitting in an empty classroom all day waiting....

Proud mom
My son was injured during the first week of boot camp at Fort Benning. After a medical evaluation it was determined that he had prior injuries that were missed from a motorcylce accident he had 6 months prior to leaving for boot camp. My son's Capt. called me and told me my son would be sent home. That his physical condition was just not what it needed to be. That was almost 5 weeks ago...I have heard nothing since. I have spoken to my son 2 times, and he says his paperwork has been completed for almost 3 1/2 weeks and they have taken back all of his gear, except for on pair of each..t-shirt, pants, boots, and socks. Even his water pack. That happened more than a week ago. He is still with his platoon. At this point being targeted as a quitter, etc. He is not a quitter, he is devastated that his dream of serving our country has been shot to heck. I am wondering just how much longer will they keep him there before sending him home. Seems a little sill that they would continue to pay him. When he is not doing anything but sitting in an empty classroom all day waiting....

Karen Leal
My son just got to boot camp this past Wednesday night. I talked to him this morning and he said he is not army material. He said he does not have the mental ability to kill anything or anyone. I do not feel he is weak because he is so strong. He has been through a lot medically speaking. They also told him he failed the hearing test yesterday. What can he do? I told him not to worry about what other people tell him. It is not their life. He is not a momma's boy either.

My Son had gone to Fort benning in late oct.....he had got injured and they gave him a month recovery...he had been wanting to join for years and seemed happy as he liked his DS's even though he did miss *home* well he went back after his month was up to new DS'S and things changed...I nor anyone has heard form him in a month.phone or letters. But last contact i had was he said they hated him so much it was frightning.and when others got to call they wouldnt allow him. Its not like him not to contact us his gf or His daughter. Ive emailed the base.we left messages im at my wits end as they told him he was being let go for medical. So what can we do? They maybe soldiers but they still are Human, and yes family worries.

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