Should I feel guilty for not deploying?

Fred

No, you should not feel guilty for not deploying.

I know how you feel. Even though I did 2 tours in Iraq, I sometimes feel guilty for retiring by my own choice, and not going back over.

The main thing is that you were available to your country. It just wasn't in the cards for you to go over there.

Count your blessings, I have found that combat does not make you a better man, it takes something away from you.

Boo

No why? According to statistics less than 50% of the military has deployed and only about 27% have deployed more than once. My step dad was a pilot in WWII and never deployed and he joined in 1941. That's just the way the deployment bounces. Best of luck with your life.

jeligula

Survivor's guilt can be pretty powerful, but don't let that make your decisions for you. Or maybe you are just upset that you did not get your war? Either way, talk to your wife about what is best for the both of you. Law enforcement would keep you occupied without getting bored.

thewifey

NO WAY JOSE!!! you should not feel guilty, but proud that you served your country!!!!!! It's not YOUR fault your unit didn't depoly. You have served your time, and your country. you have a family now, if you don't want to leave her then you need to get out and serve your community like you want to do.

thehumanbeagle

Don't feel bad. You were trained and ready to fight when we needed you to. That's all we ask of our Patriots is to be there when we need you. They called me in to Bosnia. To be honest, I would have rather not gone. No one in their right mind wants to kill people. But, we have to uphold justice and allow good to prevail by pushing back evil. I was willing to sacrifice my life, just as you were. God Bless our forefathers.

Thank you!

Kuuipo

I'm a ex-wife to a former Marine. He was deployed most of our time together and he loved every second of it. I know that if he wasn't able to deploy it would have nearly drove him nuts. However, your career didn't take you down that path. I don't think you should feel guilty. You joined and server our Country and were willing.... That says enough to me! Thank you for being one of the many who fight for our freedom!

Also, my son will be enlisting as a Soldier in the Marines. He too, wants to deploy. He has grown up always feeling in his heart that its important for him to serve his Country, no matter what the outcome may be. He feels led to go, and I will be here praying as I do.

Peter G

You enlisted, where ready to deploy, to fight for your country, I wouldn't feel guilty if I was in your shoes.

patriotic italienneâ„¢ v1.01

You don't need to feel guilty. There are many roles in the military and some of them actually involve protecting the United States of America. Be proud. That's what you were doing in the USA.

forgivebutdonotforget911

I deployed to Saudi Arabia four days after the birth of my first child. I felt real guilty about leaving my wife and child behind.

My wife was active duty also, she felt real guilty because she did not get deployed to the war zone because she just had a baby.

I retired 2 months after 911. I felt guilty about that but due to the rules, I had to retire at 20.

I have friends who went to Vietnam who feel survivor's guilt. Their buddies in their units died and they survived and they feel guilty about it.

Everyone has different reasons to feel guilty.

Ask yourself this. Did you do ANYTHING at all to arrange things so you would not get deployed? Did you fake an illness? Did you "accidentally" hurt yourself so you would not be deployed? Did you pig out so you were over weight or get yourself on a control roster so you could not be deployed?

If you did not deliberately do anything to prevent your deployment, then you have nothing to feel guilty about. It was just the roll of the dice that you did not go.

You served your tour. If you want to re-up, that is fine. If you want to get out, that is fine. But do not make a decision based upon "guilt" when none exists. Make a decision on where you are today and what you want to do tomorrow.

Nice Guy

You have no reason to feel guilty.I will tell you this.It's not advice,it's just my own 2 cents worth.I was in the Marines during the Vietnam War.Like you,I was never sent over.It wasn't in the cards.I chose not to re-enlist.I could have for 2 years and gone over.I was 21 at the time and tired of running and taking orders.Now I regret my decision and have for years.Not that I feel guilty but I wish I had stayed in.30 years from now when you're listening to fellow Marines that did go.How will you feel?That's something you might not even be considering.Good luck to you,Semper-Fi.

guns155mm

Don't feel guilty. You have done more then most. Enjoy your life and be proud to tell your future children that you are a former Marine.

Semper Fi

Barry auh2o

You enlisted, you would have gone but they never asked you to???
There's no need to feel guilty. You would have followed orders, that's what is important.You took care of your obligation to the Marines, now it's time to take care of your obligation to your wife.

Paul M

I am mysef a retired corporal from the marine corps who never deployed. Here is the thing to remember. We were both ready to deploy at ant point in time which would have put our lives on the line for our countries. You should be extremely proud of the service you went through and nothing but proud.

bailie28

no you shouldnt feel guilty most people i know dont volunteer to go on deployments they go when their unit goes...your unit didnt go its not like you faked a reason not to go or whined until they took your name off the list..so be proud of your service..the question is would you have went had your unit went or would you have come up with an excuse to get out of it? thats how you will know if you should feel guilty or not..but its in the past now...and continue on with your life and be proud of your service...

Victor

I here this all the time, well about 4 or 5 times, ha. I'm in the navy you know what the primative idea of fighting is with guns, thats the old days. Everything someone does in their life from something as samll as moving their leg to the right to anything else effects the whole future of the world wether they know it or not. crazy as it sounds whatever you did to help your country counts. I'm not in iraq, I'm on shore duty working 3 days a week. But hey I'm helping my country and what im doing is helping this country's future. That's how I see it, you don't have to go to iraq. Iraq is not were the only danger is anyways. but I could understand were your coming from since your an infantry man.

chris

well if it were me i would enlist again and do one tour to help my brothers over there in iraq and afganistan its all how you way it man...

Samantha

actually, to be honest, my husband has been in the sandbox for two years, going on three and he thinks it is messed up that 50% of the army has never been. However, you served your time and it is what it is. You tried to go over there and that is what counts. Some guys go over there and dont do ****. Feel proud of your accomplishments, and too add, law enforement is also a very noble way to serve your country

Gotta have more explosions!

You should feel very guilty. In forty years, you should be waking up in a sweat at midnight, praying for one more chance to go back to your battalion, back for one chance to see the desert.

No, not really. Why shouldn't you be content with 4 years of honorable service?

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