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Would you marry a Soldier if you knew he would go to war?
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Would you marry a Soldier if you knew he would go to war?

I am engaged to a US Army Soldier. I know that in the next 4 years he will be going to Iraq. Would you marry a soldier if you knew he would be going to iraq.
Additional Details
I just wanted to say that you guys and gals are being really helpful right now. Thanks a bunch!


    




life as we know it
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I am married to a soldier who has been to Iraq 2 times and now looking at his 3rd tour and if I had known he was going to war when we got married almost 8 years ago yes I would have married him still. He is the love of my life and we have 3 beautiful children. I know it is really scary but if he is your one true love and means the world to you could you really not just marry him because of the "If" factor. The way things are going who knows he may not have to go, but are you willing to let him go just because he MAY go. If you,knew he was going to be diagnosed with cancer in 4 years would you still marry him? Love means not letting anything stand in yuor way of happiness. He is going to be defending our country and fighting for us, being a military spouse is one of the hardest jobs in the world but I wouldn't change it for the world either. If you feel really stongly that you shouldn't marry him then don't. But don't let the love of your life go just because you think he could go.


Amanda
Your fiance going to Iraq should not be a factor in whether or not you get married. If you love him and want to spend the rest of your lives together than marry him. If being a soldier is causing you to question than maybe you don't want to get married after all. Just go with your heart, the rest is just details.


Lou
if you love him enough yes not everyone that goes out there gets hurt, he'll need the support and he'll have something to make sure he gets home for. i think you a lucky lady to be with someone brave enough to do this job. all the best for the future


Heather W
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i married my army soldier knowing their is a possibility that he'd be deployed. if you truly love him than don't let him being deployed stop you.

a military wife


Elle
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If I loved him I would


unbendable
yes I'm going into the army too. I hope my girl will stick by me and marry me when i come back. Besides ur never gunna find a man better then a soldier in the US military.


xadralix
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I would definately. Think about it this way, if something happens to him while at war you end up with some serious money from the insurance. Its about a quarter of a million.


ILoveMySailor
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My husband and i had been engaged for quite some time, but got married down in florida when he was going through a-school. i knew what i was getting into, but i am very proud to tell people that i am a navy wife. he is currently deployed for 6 months. its going to be the hardest six months ill ever face alone, but the day he is due to return will be the best day of my life! not everyone has the right to say 'i married a military man!'


accountant
Rating
You marry a person by listening to your heart. Don't be afraid of what may happen. Be happy with what you can have now. If you are worried about separation, who's to say one of you couldn't get a job that keeps you apart anyway. If you are worrying about him getting hurt or killed, that could happen at anytime in a car accident or a number of other ways. Deployment is not fun but it can also bring you closer together. If you can stay close in a deployment you can conquer most situations.


JOY2006
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If you loved him. then marry him!!


Kasey
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I married my husband before he joined the Army and I know that he will probably most likely be in Iraq in the next two years. I love him and I regret nothing about being married to him. I say if you love him, marry him and don't have any regrets about it because that will only but a strain on your marriage.


ladybug03284
I am married to a soldier and I wouldn't change it for anything in the world. He is giving the ultimate sacrificed and for that I am very proud of him.

If you love him then it won't matter if he's military or not. For better or worse. But make the decision that you feel is in your best interests.


StaLynnCey
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I would definetly marry him if I loved him very much. I think it would be worth every moment even if I knew he was going to die. When you find someone you really want to share your life with, I just couldn't pass on that.


Nicole
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ABSOLUTELY!!!
I married my husband a month before he deployed to Iraq, and I'm not saying that it is easy by any means....but you get through it and your relationship is stronger for it, and you appreciate the little things so much more than if you were in just a normal relationship.
I just have one word of advice for you.
COMMUNICATION IS KEY!!
I wrote him a letter every night before bed...even if it was just a paragraph about how my day was and he did the same thing.
I think that is the reason we came out stronger than we were when he first deployed.
BEST OF LUCK!
It is SO worth it!


Niki
Yes. My boyfriend is in the Army. He's already been to Iraq once, and is going in October for his second tour. He's talking about proposing when he returns. I would have to say that if you love him enough to be engaged to him, you have to accept his decisions for his life. If he chose to do join the Army, then he knew what he was signing up for. You must think positivly about the entire war experience. To be a military wife, you MUST be strong for your soldier, and I believe that you are, or else you wouldn't be looking for a way to stay in this!


† Crusader †
Yes, I would if I were you and if I was in love with him too.
By the way, why do you say that the US army will stay another 4 years in Iraq. I am sure they will withdraw soon. Pray for them!


reichman2007
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Ummmm...do you love him?


missada51
IF I LOVE HIM I WOULD MARRY HIM IN A HEART BEAT


a_rivers1968
Yes, I would.


Jodo
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I've been married for almost 3 years and was deployed for 15 months of that time, missed both of my aneversasries. My wife really helped me to get throught it. It wasn't about me leaving her for a year it was about me being in Iraq for a year. I think any woman that wouldn't marry a man she loves because of the military is selfish. You have no idea what its like to walk off a plane after so long and see your wife standing there. Its the greatest feeling in the world and she did it for me.


begum84
i would not; he will be brainwashed.


Green-eyed Nikki
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If your love for him is true, then you should stick by his side no matter what happens... though you haven't yet taken the vows, when/if you marry him you will say " 'til death do us part". He'll be ok if you believe he will. Good luck, and I wish you both all the best.


DOOM
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How soon is he deploying? There are people who spend 20 years in the army without deploying. If he's deploying soon, I would wait until he gets back. I would suggest that for him, too. There no point in getting married in time to spend the first year separated from your spouse.


Wolfpacker
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If I loved him. For better or worse.


waleedoo
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I do respect what he is doing .. and the purpose .. defending the country is very noble. But i would not get in a relationship with a person that is going to war .. it is worst than being married to a cop .. because they are under attack at all times.

If you already have feelings for this guy .. just tell him that you care about him so much .. and thats why you are going to let go .. because it is too hard for you to keep waiting here never knowing if he is really going to come back or not.

If he comes back and his service is done .. and you are single at that point .. then maybe you can get back together ..

if you need more help .. email me at walidachourltu@yahoo.com


Crybaby
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My father is a military man so...
If you love him, you shouldn't ask this....
if he is a solder - he is a brave man! Just listen to your hart and be happy!


HEartstrinGs
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I am married to a soldier....for the last 17 years. He wasn't in the Army when we started dating....he proposed to me from Basic Training. The wedding didn't even go as planned....he was being sent strait over to Germany from school. Instead, I went to him and got married by the JP. When I married him, I knew what I as in for, at least the basics of it. I loved him and that's all that mattered. It's still all that matters today. Our marriage has outlasted many others. Since marrying, he's been to the dessert 3 times and Korea (unaccompanied tour) twice. That doesn't count all the MANY other times we've spent apart.

Basically, what I'm saying, is that if you love him, that love will endure. In simple, being an Army wife, if I had to do all over again.....I would NOT change a thing!!


♥Brown Eyed Chef in Training ♥
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yes i would.i'm currently engaged to one also. but it all depends on how you really feel about it. how in love are you? and can you wait out the 4 yers.


Beyond Animatrix
IF YOU'RE NOT IN ♥ WITH A SOLDIER

If you're not in ♥ with a soldier, you can't know adventure. You don't know smelly gray PT uniforms that require a daily washing. You can't understand green and brown camouflaged bags flooding your bedroom floor.

If you're not in ♥ with a soldier, you can't understand the meaning of the phrase "going to the field" and the weeks you spend away from each other.

If you're not in ♥ with a soldier, you can never imagine the hole in your heart when that phone call comes? "Honey, I am leaving tomorrow to go overseas. I don't know how long I will be gone or exactly where I am going, but I want you to know that I ♥ you - always!"

If you're not in ♥ with a soldier, you don't know what it's like to say that final good-bye. You don't know what it really means to be glued to the television. You don't understand fear and you can't possibly understand the sleepless nights of endless crying wondering if you will ever see the ♥ of your life alive again.

If you're not in ♥ with a soldier, you can't know the immense joy, the uncontrollable smile, or the butterflies in your stomach when you see your soldier march into the family waiting area upon redeployment. You can't understand the self-control it takes to stand on the other side of the room as some higher-up gives a seemingly endless welcome home speech while all the soldiers stand in formation. You don't know what it's like to have that second first kiss or what it's like to experience puppy ♥ all over again.

If you're not in ♥ with a soldier, you can't truly understand how to make every moment count because you never know when that phone call may come again.

If you're not in ♥ with a soldier, you can never really understand how very delicate life really is.


Phil My Crack In
Rating
I would marry a chick that was going to Iraq, and I would be proud of her for her sacrifice for my country. Home of the free because of the brave.


JAMES
You should.





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