I'm pregnant. What should I do?

John T.

well the best thing you should do is adoption.. but if u can handle it you keep the baby.. and also take care of the baby... do the best thing for her/him.. also u guys brought him to this world so make a gud thing... next time make a gud disicion.. best thing for you...
LOVE, JOHN... god be wit u all the way!!!

sarah&John

you need to get to a church that will help you find the right family to adopt the baby. i commend you on the choice of having the baby. there are alot of couples out there who can't have kids and would love to adopt you baby and give him a proper home. what state and city are you in? that would help with finding a church to help. i would be more then willing to help you find a church and pastor to help guide you through this. if you want you can contact me at my youtube account my screen name is PROBOHOTTIE. i even know of two couples in my own church that have adopted children and want more. please don't hesitate to ask for help

livewire9

,,,and your a super shopper...

it looks like by the topic you posted under that you have decided what your gonna do,,, so put the baby up for adoption...

***waiting For my miracle***

Please email me at emaninores@yahoo.com

T C

you can come live with me. i will adopt your baby. i would love to have another, but my husband had a vasectomy. now we want another baby. i would love to help you. i live in north carolina.

Kenni

You know what is right for your situation!

TinaC

Thats too bad... Me and my husband are looking to adopt a newborn. We are very good people. And have the love to share. email me at tcoffey_ma2010@yahoo if you like to just chat thanks take care

fruitfullvine05

First of all, I'm so sorry for the reactions of your boyfriend and parents. How old are you? Personally, I would try my best to keep my baby and raise him/her, with or without help from the father or my family. However, you know your situation better then I do and if this isn't possible, I would give the baby up for adoption. There are plenty of wonderful couples out there who, for whatever reason, cannot have a baby of their own and would love your child with all their hearts. This may be a bad time in your life right now but you can make someone else's life so much better with the gift of your baby. Good luck and I'll pray for you :)

â™¥

sorry sweety... but where theres a will theres a way.. dont put your baby up for adoption... once the baby is born put the father on child support and you will have some cash there.... get a job if u dont have one and rent out a room or somthng... start off small.. and go big.. you can do it.

Calandrea

You should look into all your options. You don't have to have a man to raise your babies but it is going to be hard without your family's support. There is nothing at all wrong with giving your baby up and if you feel that it is the best thing for you I say God Bless you there are a million women in this world that cannot have children and you may be God's way of making their dreams come true. Don't feel bad about it because it takes a lot more than ppl think to be a parent. It takes a lot to admit that you can't than to hold on to the children and they are the ones who suffer. Now its not going to be easy but they do have open adoptions as well so you will know where your children are and how they are doing.

Good Luck and if you want to chat hit me on messenger Untouchablep21

BabyGirl

I know what its like to have your boyfriend up and leave you when they find out your pregnant. But I was 17 when I had my baby. And not knowing where to turn and what I should, I had the thought to place for adoption. Throguh this thought I didnt allow the father to have any part in my decision (being for what he did, leaving me and the baby). So I didnt have a job, im stilling trying to finsh high school, and knowing that the father didnt want anything to do with us, and I wouldnt want my baby to be placed with them and their way of living. I decided the best decision for not just me but my baby. Me loving him so much and caring about him so much I placed him for adoption. If your not in a position to support the baby and to be there for the baby, and are going to struggle or be tight with money, then as much as it will hurt you, it will be the best thing for your baby and ONE day he/she might come find you and say thanks for doing the best thing for me.

I know it will be hard to do it, definitly if your not a strong person inside yourself. And if your not the best thing you can do is have the baby and give him stright to the parents. Because then once you see the love, and care, in the familys eyes and face you will know you did a good job and the best thing.

I hope with me telling you all this you will take it in and make the right decision. If you have any questions you can email me at jennylulubgs@yahoo.com

Ranchmom1

I would start with social services. They should be able to give you some direction on a safe place to stay and help you with applying for governmental assistance. Whether or not your boyfriend "wants" the baby has nothing to do with his legal responsibilities for the child and he will be required to pay child support.

jandismommie

First you need to decide if you want to raise the baby on your own or give it up for adoption. If you choose to keep the baby contact your local Assistance office and they will help you find a place to live, food, cash assistance, etc. until you are able to get a job and get on your feet. Also you can get on your local WIC program and they will help with formula. For help with clothing and other necessities you need for the baby you can go to yard sales, second hand stores, ebay, Birth Right, etc. It won't be easy to raise the baby on your own but it isn't impossible. So if you are willing to work hard you can raise the baby on your own, but if you feel you are unable to give the child what it needs then please give him or her to someone who can.

Keri Bear

I am very sorry and can imagine how you must feel. My husband and I are currently with an adoption agency and are waiting to get chosen by a birthmother. If you do want to give your baby up for adoption there are agencies that can help you and they will provide you with a place to live and help you with your expenses (within legal limits). Most adoptions are open where you can see your baby and get pictures/updates, etc. This is a wonderful alternative if you are not able to care for your child but do want to be a part of its life. If you do decide this is an option for you please let me know and I can possibly have our agency either contact you or refer you to a good agency in your area.

I know you must be scared and I will keep you in my prayers!
God bless you!

eagalbabe

You have two options,

keep the baby or put the baby up for adoption

neither are going to be easy, keep that in mind

If you choose adoption your baby will be given to a couple who cannot have children of there own and have most likely been on a waiting list for a long time.

If you want to be in you're child's life, but cannot not raise them on your own you can consider an open adoption.

If you keep the baby, you need a job, you need to stay in school, your going to need daycare, cloths, diapers, crib, stroller....all these things.

You can get most of the items at yard sales for cheep,

You can all try going to a young mothers home in your area, they will help you get on your feet so that you can provide a life for your child

GEE-GEE

I am sorry for the situation you are in. It is rough at any age. You have plenty of options. I have a son that my husband and I adopted 4 years ago. If you want you can email me and we can chat. I can give you all the info you need about adoption.

dontknow86

Well to bad for your boyfriend he will be paying child support, How old are you? If you under 18 you and your new baby can go into a forster home if your over 18 the government will find you housing. Go to your S.S.I. in your Co.

Voyageur

I don't know where you live but I would make sure your decision is YOUR decision and not pushed upon you by society. I am proof that having a child at a young age (15) does not always end in trouble (I finished college). If you are White and having a biracial child please keep in mind (and I work with US foster children) that a Latino child is adopted 4x's less than a White child and a Black child is adopted 8x's less than a White child.
If you choose adoption, I would recommend an open adoption but again it is your decision.

Your choice.

Have you spoken to your boyfriend's mother?

mom_of threegirls

I think that you should find a womens shelter in your area~~ they can give you information and places that will help. You can keep your baby or give it up for adoption just make sure that what you choose is really right for YOU! Think hard because there is no going back! Once you have made a decision of this magnitude it will stay with you forever! If you are ify at all do not do it! Good Luck and things will look up no matter what you choose! It will get better.

nicoledraycott@yahoo.com

if you want the baby go for it. could you go through the rest of your life thinking what if? your parents may come round after all it's their grand child.

Tonia

Have you talked with your "boyfriend's" parents? Maybe they will help you, afterall it's their grandchild, too.

If not, and you really need to be out of your house because it would be a bad environment for you and your baby, you should call your local social services and explain your situation to them. You may get passed from person to person until you get the RIGHT person to talk to, but there are many women's shelters you could go to. The women's shelters in my area will take you in if you are homeless. Then their goal is to help you get out on your own. they will help you and your baby.

With that said, you know there is a law that if someone lives in your house, they cannot kick you out. They'd legally have to evict you... even if you let a friend stay with you for a week and that friend decided that it was their home... you'd have to evict them. So, you may want to consider staying at home and just asking your parents for an eviction notice if they're serious.

Jen

you should be responsible and do whats best for you and the baby. If you can't provide a stable home for the child then you should definitely think about adoption. If you think you can handle the consequences of being a single mom then keep it. But you should was best for the baby, it didn't asked to be brought to this world. You made the choice and so did your boyfriend.

Go to social services. They have all kinds of assistance programs for people like you til your able to get on your feet. Housing assistance, food stamps, medicade, emergency clothing, heating assistance and so on. Depending on the situation they can help provide or fully provide a sitter paid on their expense if your in school and or working. Take your bf to court and get support. Its not impossible. If you are under 18, your parents HAVE to take care of you. They cannont just kick you out. Its called child neglect. Your child is not their responsibility but if your a minor you are. Some states have laws that if the parents AND child consent to living apart after the age of 16 it is not child neglect on the parents part, BUT if the child doesn't attend school the parents can be taken to court. Or if the child doesn't have the basic needs met the parents can face charges. Check your state laws to see how to approach this legally or ask a social worker. If your parents wanted to be mean they could list you as a runaway have you taken to juvi and the baby in foster care even though they consented. I've seen that happen so the parents won't get charged with anything. The only way your parents could avoid that is to forfeit parental rights. Total Emancipation. Not even marriage is total. A judge has to sign the papers. Your not always going to be in this situation. Try your hardest to keep your baby before you give him or her up. If you can't do it at least you gave it your best. Adoption is not always the best option. You can do it. It will be tough but its very possible. Good luck!

smarmy

I'd like to know just how many of these people who oh so easily suggested adoption have actually done it themselves? My guess is NONE. Trust me this is something that is easier said than done.

There are prices to be paid for surrendering a child. The first of which is the long term affects this is going to have on your child. Second is the long term affects it will have on you. Adoption is not for the faint of heart, it is grueling and filled with guilt, remorse and pain.

Its a crap shoot, you never know what kind of parents your child is going to get. Opened adoptions are NOT enforceable which means you can sign up for one and be told you will have one and then you can be cut off with no explanation.

I suggest you NOT call an agency, or go to church looking for a family. Instead call your local DHS office and find out what is available to you in support of KEEPING your baby and give it a try. Adoption is always an option down the line if you honestly can not do it. But try first. You owe it to your baby and yourself.

List the father on the birth certificate because your child deserves to know who his/her father is and one day he/she WILL have that right. Which BTW he/she will not have that right (depending on where you live) along with other BASIC civil rights if you surrender him/her. This also affords you child support,

Think this through, you have no idea the stigma that goes along with being "one of those women", a surrendering mother. I know its scary, but anything new and unfamiliar is. Your family may come around, this is their grand child. The father may even come around, I'm sure he's scared too.

Your child will have more respect for you in the long run for giving it a try and not being able to succeed than they will if you just dump them and run. You have every right to raise your baby. And there is every possibility that you will do just fine at it. Your not going to be a scared unemployed young mother forever. In 5 years you will be well on your way to being a functioning, working, woman who has to face the world anyway, so why not do it with your child. Money does NOT make a family. It is necessary, but think about it, how much does a baby reeeealy need in the first 5 years?

email me if you need more encouragement, I've done both. I surrendered my first and raised the next two by myself for a long time before getting married.

lovely_lullbaby

Try a church or women's shelter.

Best of Luck Sweetie!!

Corn is not dog food! No wheat!

You should call the welfare office and get all the help you can right now.

Tell them what your baby daddy's up to. They'll chase him to the end of the earth and enforce child support for you.

At the welfare office, ask about women's shelters, shelters for pregnant mothers, and any other resourses in your area. You might spend a few nights in a shelter, but having a baby is "do-able". You just need to find the right support, work hard, and love your baby.

life is like the ocean

Keep your baby. You will regret adoption for the rest of your life. Your child will too. Do whatever it takes to keep your baby.

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