is adoption better than abortion? why?

Vicky

Perhaps because the death of an unborn child isn't involved in an adoption?

Noodles

I can tell you what my opinion is on this because I have gone both ways in this matter. For me, the guilt you carry after having an abortion (so immense and intense and no I'm not catholic...these are my values) at least the guilt I felt for 'killing' a human being and one that I created was too much to bear. I could never choose that again. Granted, there is a lot to giving your baby up for adoption but #1) your irresponsibility lead to creating a life and it's not fair to terminate it just because it is 'inconvenient'. Be accountable. #2)The joy and happiness and love you feel from the family that is adopting your child is indescribable (at least that was what occurred in my situation.) It is very important, was for me, to be actively involved in the adoption process. Did you know you can choose who adopts your child? These days there are so many options. It is almost limitless. You just have to do what works for you.

Hope that helps. Good luck.

Rachel

I am an adopted child. Speaking from my own personal experience, adoption is 100% better than abortion! Think of the lives that could be lost through abortion! If I had not been put up for adoption, I never would have met my current family, who I love with all my heart. I never would have met my husband, sister, amazing in-laws, and the friends that have shaped my life in such amazing ways! God truly has blessed me through the hard decision my mother had to make almost twenty years ago!

Arlanymor

I would rather be adopted than aborted i think

ultÃmÎ± dÎ±rk prÃncÑ”ss â™¥

of course it would be brave of a woman to keep a healthy pregnancy that she didn't want and it would be deemed as the right thing to do, but not everyone has the strength, which is not the person's fault.

adoption gives the chance of life which is favourable over death, but that doesn't mean though that i would expect a rape victim to keep a pregnancy that made her feel petrified and traumatised.

Ferbs

I believe that it is though I would never presume to tell another woman what her decision should be. I am sure being an adoptive parent has further validated my view...but I always felt this way.

Just a personal belief that if parenting is not an option for a woman (and the dad isn't part of the picture...let us NOT forget there are dads involved)...then adoption is the better choice.

When you think of everything that happens in the womb from the first second to time of birth (the developments, movements, every minute detail put in place), it speaks TO ME...that the baby was meant to be born.

But I'll be the first person to stand behind a woman being attacked for having an abortion.

Chantelle :) <3

ermm.. to be honest i side to both... because adoption could be the best thing for the child if they have good parents who adopt them.. also its good for people who cant have children.. how ever what if they dont get good parents? To be honest ide think abortion is better! I could never have a child then put it up for abortion.. your better of just get rid of it as soon as if thats how the mother feels... either way i would never terminate my child!! It depends no 1 has the right to judge ANYONE we all make mistakes so all you who have answered ''its killing the baby'' blah blah you cant judge people because some point in your life you will make a mistake!!!!!!!!

OH AND WHAT THE F**K ARE YOU LOT ON ABOUT ITS MURDER!! GROW UP ITS NOT EVEN A HUMAN WHEN MOST WOMEN ABORT!! WHAT EVER IS THE BEST OPTION TO THE MOTHER THEN THATS WHAT SHOULD BE DONE!

lilloric

eye of the beholder on this question.everyone will have a different answer.personally i couldn't abort a baby of my own if there was no reason to but if i had some situation that i had to either abort or give it up i would abort because every adopted child that i have known was molested by the adoptive father,i know this sounds horrible but it's true, so i would not be able to give the child away.i would rather not have it suffer a life of pain.i'm sure there are good adoptive families out there but i just haven't seen any yet

Rachel Di

You really shouldn't compare the two. It depends on a lot of different things.

Megan

No. Abortion is the right choice.

nvro1

Either way you ruin a life...SO no it is not better. Why be so f'd up and bring someone in to this HELL of an Earth only to put them up for adoption. Not to mention the fact that they(kids in the system) are bad statistics for crime and many other issues. Why be so dumb and put a child through that? And possibly create a monster to society. If you have a child you should keep it........"when I say you, that's not meaning you literally

minimouse68

Nope, and neither is abortion better than adoption. They are both entirely seperate issues.

Dsdsd

Well if the baby is being put up for adoption then hes obviously not going to have a very happy life so abortion would be the best solution. End the suffering early.

myst1998

They are both as bad as each other... actually adoption comes off just a bit worse to be honest.

Really though, they are completely different topics and it is getting tiring to see the two constantly pitted against each other.

People have abortions for all different reasons, some of those medical. Adoption is a whole different kettle of fish and causes lifelong agony. One is about the choice not to proceed with pregnancy and the other is usually nothing to do with the mother's choice.

I personally detest both but would choose abortion over adoption now I know so much more of both.

Salade Girl

nope!

grapesgum

Form the people that I know of who have done both - no. It is about 50/50 for abortion/parenting. Adoption - they would never, ever consider adoption again.

7rin

No, abortion is better than adoption because it's better never to've existed than to be abandoned by the one person who's supposed to love you more than life.

ETA@Ashley: Just because you can't carry your own parasite, doesn't mean your desire to parent overrides some other woman's decision on whether or not they want to continue carrying a life-threatening parasite. Oh, and I'm not flat-out stupid either, but thanks for the insult.

You need to undergo SERIOUS counselling before you're ready to take on anyone else's child.

*applauds CDraBella's answer*

Also, please see Breaking the Silence: On Living Pro-Lifers' Choice for Women at http://shakespearessister.blogspot.com/2009/03/breaking-silence-on-living-pro-lifers.html

SJM

No.

I wish a question involving opening records for adoptees could provoke such a large, immediate response.

Dreamweaver back for more

One has nothing to do with the other. One is stopping a pregnancy, one is continuing a pregnancy. One is ripping a baby away from its mother....one is ripping a baby away from its mother..oh...um..well, hmmmm

Clive Reborn

Abortion is quicker, more convenient and nobody else need know.

Even if your life can stand the inconvenience of going through a pregnancy, you may find yourself reluctant to part the with the baby when it is born.

If you have education or career plans go for the abortion rather than risk destroying your own life for the sake of a foetus.

Pip

No doubt the majority of those in favour of adoption over abortion haven't got a clue what it is like to be bullied and lied into surrendering. Although I am pro - life I also believe in choice.

If a woman wants to abort that is HER choice.

If a mother wants to parent then she should be supported in her decision to be a parent. If a woman wants to surrender then that is HER choice.

What is wrong is to force a woman to do something she doesn't want to do and I am talking from experience.

My sister wanted to parent but was forced to abort all because that is what my parents wanted. This was despite her boyfriend (who was working, she was at school) wanting to support her and their baby.

I was pregnant at 19, working and want to parent but was bullied and lied into surrendering. So far I have lived 28 years of a living hell because I didn't get the moral support to raise my son like I should have got. We reunited 5 years ago and the only good thing to come out of it is that he is alive, well, no mistaking he is my son (in looks) and we do have a lot in common. The down side is he has made my life a misery. Nobody can persuade me adoption is better than abortion because I am still living the nightmare.

Ethel

No it's not better, ideally a mother would not need to give up their infant which means they were in a good place when they conceived nor was the conception violent or coerced and the pregnancy was desired. I don't think you can really equate adoption with a solution to termination at all, it's not the same thing at all.

Walter Ford II

Someone elses pregnancy is none of your business.

Carol c

One has nothing to do with the other. What's better for one mother may not be for the next and it should be her choice.

Big dummy with common sense.

It really depends on your views.

I believe in freedom of choice for the woman who is pregnant.

I personally think abortion is a better alternative because there are already close to a billion children on the planet who need care. Please don't hate me for my views, I am very glad I am a male and that I will never have to make this kind of a decision, and I feel sorry for those that do have to make this decision.

It would be a terribly hard choice to make, and it would be a choice that I am certain would leave emotional scars for the rest of the persons life.

Mama Bear

Better for whom?

I would say it depends. What happens if the baby never finds a home and is foster care its entire life? Or The adoptive parents are abusive? My friend had both of his adoptive parents die before he was 2. What if the parents split up? Or have their own kids and completely neglect the outsider? Talk to some adoptees and listen to their stories. Its not all sun shine and rainbows. Some do wish they had been aborted rather then go through what they went through. There no guarantee that the baby will be placed in a better situation.

As for the mother, it depends as well. Would it be easier emotional and physically to abort a fetus after 6 to 8 weeks. 4 of those weeks she probably didn't even know she was pregnant. She been hormonal, probably sick at this point. Has been through cramp like pains because her uterus is stretching. It seems easier to me to give up a child you never knew, felt, heard, saw or loved. Then it does to carry for 9 months of very hard work just to hand him or her to someone else. Most likely to never see the child again. Most open adoptions don't stay open. After the ink drys the adoptive parents can do whatever they want and there nothing legally a birth mother can do about it.

So again i would say it depends on the mother and unforeseeable events for the child. Overall, parenting is the best solution and there should be more resources to provide low income families with the ability to raise their own kid.

p.s. Sorry this is going to offend some people but i have to say it. This does not apply to ever situation but it does apply to most. Your not providing an infertility couple with a child. Your providing them with a baby big difference. If they are so desperate and want a child so badly, they'll look to foster care. But instead of helping children who really need a loving home. They'd rather have an infant that they can pretend to be their own. Its selfish to pay that much money for a baby, when there are thousands who need a home. To me that is not a loving parent. That's a greedy individual saying "gimme" with no concern for the birth mother's well being.

CDraBella

A woman's body. A woman's choice.

How about supporting and helping women keep and parent their child instead?

I'd have an abortion before I ever gave up another child for adoption.

Buddha

I don't believe so. I have been lucky enough to be able to bring up my two children and if I hadn't been, then I wouldn't have had them.

I never knew who my natural father was and it has caused me to struggle with my sense of who I am for all of my life. I believe that people who haven't been in this position and called abortion murder are well meaning people but really have no idea at all.

If you give away your child, you have no knowledge of what is happening to them and have no opportunity to teach them the things you believe are important. They are a part of you and deserve to be brought up by you.

I believe that abortions should be carried out within the first twelve weeks after conception and that girls/boys, young men/women should take far more care to ensure that pregnancies don't arise.

gypsywinter

NO!! Because a woman has the lawful right to decide if she wants to remain pregnant or not. No woman should be forced to remain pregnant against her will. We saw what happened in The Baby Scoop Era when abortion was illegal....millions of babies harvested for the Adoption Mill, with the mother having no choice 98% of the time. Females were not created to be Future Breeders of America!

I am fully Pro-Choice. You stay out of my knickers, I'll stay out of yours!

ETA: Good Grief!!! Did some Pro-life org send out it's minions to bombard YA with it's Pro-Life/it's murder message? Sure seems like it!!

sir galahad

no,birth control,is better than both,common sense that's sadly lacking today

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