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i saw my best friend's husband cheating with another woman, she really loves this man, shud i tell her or not
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i saw my best friend's husband cheating with another woman, she really loves this man, shud i tell her or not

i'm confused cos i know how she really feel abou this guy, but again i'm feeling guilty if i don't tell her. (2) she might not beleive me cos she trusts this guy so much, Lads help what do i do. I don't want to hurt her at the same time it will be cool for her to know the truth. aaaah pls help help
Additional Details
Thanks for your answers a lot of them make sense, how I know he was cheating,it's like this me and my friend are Nurses so she was working a night shift and i was off. This wasn't a planned thing but my man surprised me and took me to a hotel that is an hour away from our town where we live. So as we were checking in,there is my friend's husband with this other woman checking in 2, he was so surprised i was like gobsmacked .Okay let's say it was just a friend,Y when I saw him he looked and totally ignored me besides lads c'mon y must a married man be seen checking in a hotel with another woman and her poor wife was working and this was like around 10:45pm. My man warned me to stay away cos i'll be destroying a marriage but this about my friend i really care for her.As for her husband when he sees me i can tell that he's ready to deny but i don't smile at him like i use to. I don't know if that will be a clue for my friend


    




SapphireB
Like so many other people are saying here, if this was your husband doing this behind your back (cheating on you) wouldn't you want to know? What I think that I would do is IF you see him with another woman again, see if you can get his wife to go with you there (think of a reason to go) so that she can see it for her self. Or have her to call him IF he has a cell phone (when you see him with another woman). Yes I would find a way to tell her that her husband is cheating on her. She does deserve better than that. I hate a cheater with a passion! By the way, even if you say something to him about this, that you saw him with another woman, it is not going to matter where he was or who he was with, he will make an excuse as to why he was with her. Men and women will both lie about cheating, who wouldn't. They know that their goose is cooked if they get caught so why not lie out of it IF they can. But hey, who can you lie out of it when you get caught with "your pants down". There is no excuse in the world to cheat, no matter what!


luluwadey2
i would tell her if she is your best friend, she might dislike you for a while but she will come round, look at it the other way round would you want her to tell you


mr.nasty thelickmaster
Rating
no, mind your own business!!! she could not believe you and end your friendship or your info may be wrong,or misinformed, not only will she possibly not believe you ,she could blame the failure of her marriage on you!!!


sherrone j
Rating
Yes because if you don't tell her and she finds out she will ask you why you tell her in the begining and she won't speak to you for a while


Reggie
I feel the same as Madge,and shes right?


justmeandcaring
explain to her

better she knows now rather than later

if you think she won't believe you

try to get proof if you can


Shavon
Rating
Of course you should tell her!!! She may be upset with you at first (the bearer of bad news usually gets and earful) but as her best friend it is still your job to look out for her. What if he gives her a disease because he is out cheating? By telling her you are protecting more than her feelings, you are protecting her health.


chess_is_best
Rating
u should tell her cuz it'll let her know and it'll get a load of 'guilt' off your chest


chickadee
Rating
This happened to me a few years ago. It was my sister-in-law and i saw her boyfriend knock on the front door of this house and kiss the woman who opened it. He went into this house, so i felt that she should know what i saw so i told her. Big mistake, she did'nt believe me, he denied it and i was left looking like a trouble maker. She eventually got wise to him and so will your friend. Keep quiet.


harvestmoon
Rating
Tell her!!!!! If in the future she finds out you knew and never told her, you'll get in soooo much trouble. If you don't tell her you will be protecting him not her, and she is your best friend. She needs to know what is going on. The truth has to come out.


Dee M
I know it will hurt her to hear that, but it is better than what he could bring home to her......... like HIV or AIDS!

Friends watch out for friends. Husband may come and go, but friends are forever.


GINGER B
Rating
You should tell her,

first, you are her best friend
second, she has right to know
third, if you were her you would also want to know that.


Isabel
What was the situation? How did you see him cheat?

If he was cheating, would you and a trustworthy, non-gossipy friend be able to confront him with it - not with a judgemental attitude, but with the intention of understanding where he's at, his frustrations, and offering support and the opportunity for him to change and - in a bit - for him to tell his wife himself.

If that didn't work, then yeah, I'd tell her - better in the light.


TeggieMcG
TELL HER!! SHE IS YOUR BEST FRIEND... DON'T EVEN GIVE HIM THE CHANCE TO STOP. TELL HER!! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU EVEN HAVE TO ASK... IF SHE'S YOUR BEST FRIEND, SHE WILL BELIEVE YOU. TELL HER, TELL HER, TELL HER!!


rudolph_barton
Please tell her. For the love of justice and freindship! It is so important to tell your freind that the person she absolutley loves is doing this. She should be with someone who absolutley appreciates her and loves her and only her. I am sure your probabley a little afraid to tell her, but Jesus said " the truth will set you free". Set her free, and you will be free from this feeling of doubt.


ebenjosiah
Mind your own business so to speak. It is a sin to gossip about what people do with their lives so just leave them alone and when their cup is full the truth will come out.
Your motto should be "See I no see, hear I no hear".


Curious
If you don't tell her and she finds out, you'll lose her as a friend. If you tell her and she thinks you're just jealous of her, you'll lose her.

Tell her.

I've lost friends by not telling them before. They saw it as being disloyal.


spoogie
Rating
yes tell her, whether she belives you or not is her problem, or you could tell the bloke in question you are on to him, n warn him if it happens again you will tell his wife


ItBeMoi
Write her a not so you will never have told her, or alternatively ask her would she want to know if her hubby was cheating on her.

I know I'd like to know............


exoticflava
Take her somewhere that u know he will be or take a video or a picture of what u see then show her. She will want to see proof because he will deny everything without proof.


Corona
Rating
Don't tell. If you do, and they stay together, you might never be able to have your friendship the same again. This has happened to me in the past. I told my friend about her husband, she confronted him and decided to forgive him, then our friendship was never the same, because of course he didn't want me around anymore and she wanted her marriage to work, which eventually they divorced anyway. I, personally would just keep my mouth shut. Unless she is a complete idiot, she will eventually find out on her own.


not_ON_the_CRAK ;)
NOO you couldn't do that. you'd be breaking up a marriage. let the guy gets caught stick up for the his wife. sorted.


bethannie
Rating
OOh blimey you are in that position 'i so wish i hadn't seen that'. Well, in this situation you are damned if you do and damned if you don't. I would not be the one to tell her myself and then when she finds out- she will- she will need you to support her. Then you feign innocence- you never knew- pretend to be shocked- be there for her. If you are the one to tell her she will hate you for it and she will have no best friend to support her when the s**t hits the fan.


heidi the ghosthunter
Rating
this is the ultimate dilemma, if you tell her she may not believe you & your friendship will be ruined, but if you dont she'll hold it against you if she finds out....sorry hun plead ignorance


NAN G
Rating
The right thing to do is tell her, but if you do, she more than likely will not believe you and then she and her husband both will probably turn against you. I think I would tell her anyway - she deserves to know.


ndnqt1966
Rating
If she is your best friend I think you should tell her what you know. If she happens to find out one day that you knew and didn't tell her she may be angry with you for not saying anything.


madge
Rating
Tell her, you would want to know if the shoe was on the other foot


April
If it were your husband, would you want to know? I would.


Rav
I would have physical proof of the affair before telling her. She might not want to believe you, but the photos do not lie. Without the proof, it will be your word vs. his, and if he will cheat, he will lie to cover it up.





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