what age should you tell a child that they are adopted.?

tish_part deux	birth. because he/she probably already knows.

aloha.girl59	It should be part of their story from the first day you bring the child home with you. My son was 2-1/2 when I adopted him from foster care. The words "adoption" and "first mom" have been part of his vocabulary since he could speak. There was never a time when he didn't know that he is adopted. Not telling a child about his or her adoption from Day 1 should be a crime.

7rin	From the day the adoption's finalised. Late discovery of being adopted @ http://www.findmyfamily.org/articles/late-discovery-adoptee.html Adopted â€“ but we didn't know @ http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/jan/02/adoption-children-family What is it with so many late discovery adoptees? (Y!A) @ http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20091022060246AAcJz0S For those who discovered they were adopted after they've reached adulthood @ http://www.latediscovery.org/ Brian Moore: the abuse and abandonment that shaped rugby's Pit Bull @ http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/6923457/Brian-Moore-the-abuse-and-abandonment-that-shaped-rugbys-Pit-Bull.html Brian Moore: I was abused as a child @ http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/6923509/Brian-Moore-I-was-abused-as-a-child.html

minimouse68	From the day the child is brought home they should be told their truths in age appropriate language. That way there is never a big revelation, or the big shock that comes with it. 8 is far too old to be told such a simple truth, how hard is it to raise your child with "the day we brought you home" storys? Certainly we think nothing of telling bio kids all about the day theyre born, but adoption is still seen as something that should be kept secret. To those who suggested that it should be kept secret until the child is 18 or 30.......really???

eagledreams	I was told at about the age of four. I grew up knowing. Young I think is best even though I did not really understand the whole thing at the time.

Angela R	From the very beginning, even if you don't think they really understand it that's okay. Being adopted should be something that a person has just always known and not some big secret that is suddenly reveal to them. Our children were adopted at 6 months old and we've been reading them adoption books, talking about their adoption and showing them pictures ever since.

Mama Mia	They should be told the story of how they came to be part of your family from day one. Then it will not be regarded as some deep and shameful secret that everyone has to keep. That is never a good thing. I had a parent who wanted me to change my school lesson plan because she didn't want her 5 year old son to find out that he was born in Russia! How foolish and short sighted. She was not protecting him, she was protecting herself. She kept him out of school that week so he wouldn't learn that he had been adopted. He was later told by another child in the class who had heard some of the other parents talking about why Ivan wasn't at school.

Sarah	I'd say that they should be told as early as possible. Like others have said, the later you tell them the more likely they are going to feel betrayed and lied to. One way to introduce it to children is through books like: Tell Me Again About the Night I was Born; THe Day We Met You; The Mulberry Bird; Adoption is for Always; and Did My First Mother Love Me? Though younger kids might not understand the entirety of the concept at a young age it is better than springing it on them later in life. That is how my parents introduced it to me and I can never remember a time when I didn't know I was adopted. Heck, in kindergarden I told some of my friends who didn't quite understand it and I probably didn't really understand it that well either. One of my friends was told when he was in high school and it completely threw his sense of his identity for a loop. Sure he might have been the same person even if her knew from an early age, but he felt (and still feels) like most of his life was a lie. Even now, years later he still struggles with these things.

dontknow86	Right from the start. If you wait they will turn on you and know their life was one big lie. Tell them right off!

Brianna	Well I was told I was adopted around a young age. Probably around 6-8 or younger. Yes I was crying but its better to tell them younger than in they're teen years. If you tell them at they're teen years they're going to go balistic! Best answer please? Happy Holidays! And a Happy New Year! Best Wishes ~Brianna <3

choli118	according to a family consultant who has her own show, you should tell them very young...let them grow having all your love and understanding that you are their parent just not from birth. dont ever make them feel like they were not wanted from their biological parents. this is a very delicate case to handle and if you are not sure on how to handle it, i will suggest you visit a therapist or family consultant...best of luck :)

Just browsing	I must agree with letting them know when they are young-ish but they can still understand it. Not too old otherwise they may feel betrayed or lied too. I would do it before they reach the awkward stages of teenager-dome because that would probably just add to their awkward teenage angst. I would let them know before that. But good luck :)

Jennifer A	definitely when they are young and tell them as they grow up so that they understand

---------------------------	From the very beginning let them know in age appropriate ways.

Samantha	I think it's best at 10 but not when there old enough to have there own mine and starts blaming u for everything !!!!:)

Baub	I told mine at 7 months. She was totally cool with it. Did not ask any questions or anything.

Mars	18, normally. Unless they ask. Remember to speak the truth with love.

P-I-E	around 8 since 12 they will be like why didn't u ever tell me?! and in 16 they will wanna kill themselves and 18 they won't know what to belive

teen girl	in my opinion, tell them when they're young. let them grow up understanding and accepting it as a general bit of their life.

JB	Thirty.

Ashley Flowin	id say a about 6-9 but not after theyturn 12 13 16 etc cuz then they mite get da idea of running away lol