Am I being Unreasonable with my ex concerning our children?

gothope?	I second the first persons answer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'd go back to court! Plus do you really want your kids growing up thinking that the way their father behaves is the way it should be done?

Lucky	No, your not wrong.. I'm have the same thing going on.. If he is not willing to give you any information about were he lives contact number so on.. don't let your kids go.. you might not ever no what would happen..Even thought that the father of your kids but still he might take them from you and never return them.. Maybe you'll can have visit together first at a mutual location..then once you get comfortable with that then maybe you can send the kids by there self..

adeleighernandez26	No! you are not wrong for that. You're just protecting your children. He needs to grow up and act like an adult and a father. Take his @$$ back to court. I would do the same thing.

ladyren	Pretty scary. Get an attorney, and get the rules changed, or just don't be around when he want to see your children....easy.

prettysmileygrl	Sounds like a very difficult situation all together. I don't think you are wrong to want to keep them from him, I don't know how old your kids are but talk to them see how they feel, are his parents, (the grandparents) around and will they volunteer to help by taking them so that he can see them in a supervised setting? just some ideas hope that they help.

Jersey Boy	You are not unreasonable. Call your attorney on these issues. It sounds like your ex is spiraling out of control You have a duty to protect the welfare of your children.

Erika	If you gave him joint custody, it doesn't matter if you are right or wrong. He is their dad.I'm not telling you your wrong, because I don't think you are, I'm just telling you what the law is and how hard it is to prove another parent unfit. Mine hasn't paid in two years and has a drug conviction and the state still recognizes his rights. Get a good attorney and good luck to you!!!!

carmelbrown2001	You are not wrong! You need to go back to court and tell them everything you wrote here and whatever else. Your kids do not need to be around him. He is not stable and once they find out about him being arrested, you won't have to worry about it!

babikates11	No your not at all! The judge should do something about him not paying child support and you not having his information. As for his new fling...dont worry about her. If shes immature enough to say that and he is immature enough to allow it, it wont last. Good luck sweetie!

mama	No, you're right. If he doesn't follow the orders, he can't take them. He'd have to fight you in court to do so. The court would see everything wrong with what he is doing and would rule in your favor. I had to just get a restraining order against my ex because he would just show up whenever it was convenient for him, and that was completely against the judges orders. You may want to look into that.

innocence faded	For the most part, I do not think you are being unreasonable, I just have a couple questions about your points: 5) I thought with joint custody there was no child support? 6) Do or will they call your new/current boyfriend (or whatever) "Dad"?

tobcol	Based on what you've said, it's obvious that you are not wrong. Go to court and get sole custody. That's nice that you are giving him the option of being involved in your kids lives, but you need to take care of this before it's too late and something bad happens.

simplyenigmatic25	You are not wrong at all! If I was you there would be no way I'd let my kids go with an ex like that. He is shady because of not being willing to give you all his info (what is that about?!) and he drops by without calling wanting to take them - thats not cool. His gf telling them they can call her mom is a bit ridiculous too. If you are the one who allowed him joint custody perhaps you should consider going for full custody. Talk to your lawyer and see what can be done. I certainly would want my kids going off with him - he could take them and you wouldn't even know how to reach them/where he lives/etc. If he really loved and wanted to spend time with his kids he would be following the rules, telling you the necessary information, and seeing them on a regular basis - in order to give them some stability on his visits.

CherrySplendor	Oh hell no. Thats too many violations on his part. You are doing the right thing. And that litle heiffer of his needs to stay out of it. You are their mother not her and she will never be. He wont even give you his address or job number. Thats a risk you cant take if he ever decides to up and leave with your kids. or if there is an emergency. You have to take care of your kids and you are doing good.

baller	You are crazy for letting him see your children.!

Karen	Your not wrong there's too many secrets there and God forbid that's how some people's children disappear forever

baby_luv	No you are not wrong, and tell your kids that they only have one mom and thats YOU! Tell the judge that you want full custody of the kids since your ex doesnt want to share in the kids interest and make sure to tell them that he doesnt give you any money for the kids.

jody m	no you have the right to make sure your children are safe you don't know how to find them if you need to thats not safe

?	Sounds scary to me. Tell your local police and have them start a record. Don't let him take them anywhere as long as he has that drug conviction.

Oh Boy!	Just for a moment, assume this story was being told by someone else. Would you think it was safe for that person to leave their children with an itinerant, essentially homeless, unemployed, secretive, drug user with a crazy girlfriend? Good for you for sticking up for the well being of your children.

Mark	he needs to at least give you or the courts his cell phone number at least.

zeenarah	You are not being unreasonable. . .go to court and sort everything out with them .. .at the same time if its court ourdered to have joint custody, then you might want to follow your end of the bargain so it doesn't bite you in the butt. and remind your kids that you are their mom!

babyitsyou31	You're just being a good mother by doing what's best for your children. Keep up the good work.

fajita	He should see them in a supervised enviroment he sounds a bit freaky and the children call you mom no one else.

WiserAngel	You are NOT WRONG. He is not even keeping up his end of the bargain financially or otherwise and any judge will support you. I suggest you go back to court and get the custody changed to sole custody. He is an unreliable, deadbeat dad.

Big Daddy	he outta be thanking you....if it was me he would never see his kids...ever....and it actually sounds like he needs to be in jail...how did a girlk like you get in amess with a man like him...lordy...lordy...

boogielyn3	Go back to court and get sole custody. Children do not need to be around drugs and putting them in danger by letting them go with him would be neglegence on your part.

lavenderroseford	I do not think you are wrong. Just the fact that he has not made the child support payments nixes visitation in my eyes. You need to protect your children.

timberriot	Oh absolutely not!! I would go right back to court and make these things known!!!!!! If he wants to be a dad he needs to behave like a dad