He's gonna ask me to marry him, but I have mixed feelings. What should i tell him?

*~~ strryeyedgrrl ~~*	I would approach him and have a serious discussion about your feelings now, since your relationship is getting to a serious place. If you are getting to a point that he's looking to propose marriage, it's best to open the communication now and let him know what you're still carrying with you from your past. Also, look into some therapy for yourself. It's been five years and you need to move on, for yourself more than anything. It's normal to feel the way you are after a failed marriage, but maybe someone can help you talk through your feelings and help you move away from it.

Gladiater	go with Juicy Fruit.(tell him before he asks).. don't be scared, what's the hurry?

wizjp	how about "I'm not ready quite yet"

Charley	Follow your instincts ... best vibes.... Tell him as kindly as you can, "I'm sorry, it's not you, it me". Then be honest and tell him you hope he understands. Good Luck

ken401lam	do you trust this guy? do you love him?? If both answer are yes, then you should give him a try. Think about it, if he has done everything correct and never harm you before, he doesn't know what he is doing wrong. Beside even if he's know do you just want to stay dating for 20 years and never get marry?

alpha-beta	If "YES" is not the only answer possible, than better to be safe by telling him "no, not right now.". If he loves you, he will wait for you. Be sure to talk with him and explain why you're not ready. He deserves that much.

Pat's Angel	You're probably scared that the same thing is going to happen to you, but i think you should be honest, you shouldn't go for it when you have doubts about or simply aren't ready for it, so ask him for some time, you don't want to make a mistake by saying yes though you don't feel like you're ready. So talk to him and let him know how you feel before he asks you, that way it'll be easier on him, and he'll know what to expect. Hope i was able to help!! :)

EazyBreezy	Tell him the truth. Unless you can do that, your marriage to him would never work anyway. Best of luck to you.

kitkat	Tell him you are not ready, plain and simple. If he can't wait until you are, then he is not the one for you....

buddys_angeleyes	Talk to him now! Tell him you've been thinking about marraige recently, and after the experiences you've had, even thinking about it makes you jittery. Its ok to not be ready... especially if you are still calling your current bf a 'new guy'. If he loves you he'll understand and be willing to wait. The other thing about engagements. They are not as permanant as marraiges. If you get engaged, and realize its not right for you CALL IT OFF. Its hard to do, but its OK.

kamsinghnagra	Depends how long you have been dating, please do not be another statistic in the endless divorces going on just because people are silly and rush into things to quick. Just because you are (not personally) the honeymoon period i.e. 3-6 months, dont think that hes the one, wait at least 1-2 years I would say :D

ladylady4470	Be honest with him. You will hurt him Less in the long run. You might just be worried cause of the first time so really sort out how you feel. Maybe you need to go to some counseling cause you haven't gotten over the first marriage yet and it has been 5 years.

kathy d	tell him that you are nervous to get married again based on the history. you love him and it has nothing to do with him. That you want to move forward in your relationship but just need some time.

Physics4Rich	Being scared is natural, nothing says you have to accept when they ask. Tell them the truth - if you need time, or your not ready - then please say so. It's much better then saying Yes and hating it, or saying No and not giving a reason. My sister in-law had her husband ask her THREE TIMES before she said yes.

Shantezzie	well no one can really help you unless you tell us your feelings. what's the problem? basically you have to be completely honest with something like that. just sit down and think to yourself why do you have mixed feelings. than tell him. you guys can work out something if you're considering getting married than you have some sort of good communication

Lady D	just be honest with him you have to be able to communicate with your man and if you can't then you shouldn't even think about getting married.

Ricardo R	The truth. Tell him that you are just not sure yet. Tell him that you guys need to know each other better. He'll understand. Believe me, there is nothing better than the plain truth.

?	say no... for now... until you are sure... :D

nandina221	Take your time to see if it's right for you. Don't rush into it.

Catherine1	If your'e scared then he's not the one. Afew butterflies is normal, but if your'e having to ask us, then i'd say your probably not ready. Be honest. My husband had to ask me 4 times before I knew it was the right time for me.

guero75220	the truth

LAL	If you're asking YA then I would say you're not ready. Just tell him you love him, but you're not quite ready to be married.

I do 26.2	You're carrying your feelings from your last marriage to this relationship. I would talk with a counselor in how to deal with your old issues.

EL	Tell him that you need some time.

suro25	tell him your not ready for that move yet. be honest with him

wish I were	DUh! You tell him NO! You don't agree to marry someone unless you are sure about it! Just like you don't marry someone and then divorce three months later! What a waste of time and money! You should probably just not marry at all since you can't make your mind up about anything!!!

Miss Sassy	that u need more time

Jennifer	If you aren't sure about it then your answer should be no. If you aren't sure and you say yes and then find out you hate it you will have to go through a divorce again. Good luck.

nurse ratchet	You tell him how you feel. Be honest. And, this could just be nerves since your first marriage was a bad experience.

redpeach_mi	do not have mixed feelings about it because of your emotional baggage from an old relationship. if you really think it will work, then accept. if not, then tell him that you are not ready, but some day you will be.