How do you or do you tell a neighbor their husband is having an affair?

gâ™£â™£glâ™ quâ™ â™ n	u should tell the husband to tell his wife! and if he doesn't u will cause it's wrong to do that someone regaurdless the situation. (hey i also sort of agree with the stay out of it part, but we'll all see the one's who commented to 'butt out' get cheated on how they sit there crying with their head in their hands.... 'why didn't anyone tell me!') but to each their own. u asked how u should tell and i suggest confronting the husband

elementoflife	OIE! I have wondered that.. I know I would want to know. I wouldn't mind getting the information through a letter - an anonymous letter would do quite well I should think. Then you know the information is out there. The lady can do what she pleases with the information and if she's smart, she won't say anything to her hubby but get a PI and talk to a lawyer.. anyway, That is my opinion but.. oie, that is a hard one! Poor you for having to find out!

xxxxxxxxx	I am going to go against the tide a little here...for the most part. Honestly, you do sound a little bitter or jealous, but things don't always come across the screen the way they are meant to. Think seriously about your motivation and why you would want to tell. My guess is you are not happy with your own not-so-perfect life. It sounds like you want to watch their perfect world fall. Having said that, there are children involved here and a woman who needs to protect herself from diseases. Since you must live close enough to figure out their routines, you could leave a note where you know she would get it - say in her PTA mailbox saying you think her husband is having an affair. Or, as one answer already said, you could leave a note for the husband where he would find it saying people are becoming aware he is having an affair and it is only a matter of time before his wife finds out.

G.O.A.T.	This is none of your business, especially since you don't even know her. Keep it to yourself. His time will come.

szlightning31	If you know for a fact, then tell her that you have some information for her and that you know that it will hurt but thge only reason you are telling her is because you care and that youare going to be there for her. But you need to tell her it is the right thing to do

KJ	sounds like you're jealous at their family and wants to rock the boat. DON'T.

jenny	What the first person said, stay out of it, its none of your business, it could get worse, if he wasn't cheating.

Hopethishelps!	You are so jealous. Read what you typed..........."perfect this, perfect that, perfect, perfect, perfect" if she's your neighbor than you live on that "perfect" street as well. you never know what's really going on, she might even forgive him for it, you have no idea what goes on in their house. it doesn't break your heart, it seems to me you can't wait to tell her the news. do what you want, but i hope it backfires on you.

stratostix	You keep it to yourself. It's none of your business.

aa889d	Keep your mouth shut !!!!

chula	STAY OUT OF IT

shhhshanna	Just think about if the tables were turned...Wouldn't you want to know. Us women need to stick together. Just be sure that it is true before you go accusing

ndnqt1966	You definitely should stay out of this....it isn't any of your business and most likely she wouldn't believe you...

kim p butterfly	Keep this info to your self. It's not none of your business anyway. She also might think you want her man. You never know she might already know but decided to ignore it. Especially,since you don't know her that well. Don't break-up a happy home even if it's not perfect.

redladee2001	Mind your business. She doesn't know you and probably woudn't believe you if you told her. Then you'll have them both mad at you and people won't trust you. They'll make you the enemy. If she were your friend then I'd advise you to tell her but that's not the case. Let this woman live in ignorat bliss. Maybe she knows and has something on the side herself. This may be something she's okay with and pretends not to care. Whatever the case it's not your responsiblity to be neighborhood watch......

cope_acetic	MYOB!! For all you know, she knows & doesn't care. It is never a good idea to get involved in these things.

To live is to learn	Seriously, it's not your place. Remember, they will make up and guess who will be bad guy? He'll slip up at some point. No disrespect, but mind your business.

HONORARIUS	Don't get involved...

okimreadynow	I wouldn't say anything, as sad as that is, she will find out ecentually, or maybe she even know's and chooses to over look it. She may be having an affair on the side as well, people aren't always what they seem to be for sure. But I wouldn't get involved.

Grant M	The only thing you are going to do is cause her a lot of pain... He needs a good swift kick in the behind. Is there anyway you can suttly get to him that he has been caught? I Think that soon she will find out and her finding out on her own will be so much better on her... Hey how about this... Next time he is seen out (seeing where she does not know you) call and ask for him and when she asks can I help you tell her you were supposed to meet him at Joe's place for dinner and you are here and he is late.. If she asks who it is just hang up quick... Maybe she will drive there or call there to find out whats up... Good luck.. Grant M

Voice_Of_Reason	This really is a hard one. If I was being cheated on, I would want to know, but as it's been posted above, it really is none of your business. How do you know FOR SURE? Also, you say you don't really know them, but you seem to know a lot about them? What result are you trying to acheive? If you want the affair to stop, perhaps an anonymous to HIM, reminding him about his wife and kids, would get him to break it off. If you want them to divorce, then send the same note to her.

ihaveyouranswer	If you don't even know her and she is not your friend-mind your own business...She won't believe you anway and your perfect little life may become a big huge mess if you don't mind your own.

wolf woman	You absolutely DO NOT tell her. First of all, you don't know for a fact - you may think you do, but you don't, unless you're the one sleeping with him! Second, it's for them to work out. Stay out of it.

curmudgeon	You have to stay out of it. Human nature is such, that if you told, they BOTH would hate you.

blondtxn	It truly is none of any ones business but I can't help but keep thinking about if I was the women in the situation. I would want to know. Personally, I would pray long and hard about it and if I still felt compelled to approach anyone I would privately go to the husband and tell him he had to confess to his wife or that I would tell her wife that something was going on (not that he was having an affair exactly though). That's what I think I would do in your situation... But yeah, defiantly pray about it.

phlada64	It's none of your business. The wife will find out in her own time. More harm has been done by the supposedly well meaning buttinski than any affair has ever done.

henry	WOW!! YOU KNOW ALL THIS ABOUT THEM? YOU MUST BE HOPELESS!! WHAT ARE YOU? A STALKER? GET A LIFE, NOSEY!!

nurse ratchet	You mind your own business and stay out of it. You will regret it if you don't. It will end up being your fault for saying something about it, not his for having the affair in the first place. By the way, you sound a little bit jealous of their perfect world to me. Do you want to make sure they know they aren't perfect after all? You never know what goes on behind closed doors. Don't assume anything.

informer53	Mind your own business. America would collapse if every sin were known. Support the economy and be silent! Why in the world would it cross your mind to pop a woman's illusion? You probably hate true churches, too...right? .