How much BEER is too much BEER?

JRB	That's completely ridiculous. He's averaging 5 beers every single day of the week? That, plus the fact that he makes excuses and justifications for the way he drinks, sounds like borderline alcoholism to me.

A_Moron	I think anything over 2 beers a night would be too much. And once you get some rugrats, drinking should be cut way back. Sounds like he's having issues letting go of his previous single life. Time for him to move on, sober up, and be a Dad.

Niko	i think she drinks too much

E@rthGoddess	I dont think beer really affect someones behavior, maybe it can affect someone's mood that very moment but not the total behavior or attitude..to have 2 bottles and to the most 3 bottles of beer a day is just okay, because it relaxes one's body, it gives you a quiet effect in mind and body and it soothes your stress out..but drinking that as a vice already can be detrimental to your health, like a crate maybe or half a crate maybe, you can develop a craving and finally turns out to addiction, physically you will start to have bloated stomach, and may raise your blood pressure, you can develop athritis, so somehow, anyhting that is extreme is bad, ok?Just talk to him, be patient give him a good company and may explain the consequences of drinking much and still he doesnt listen, just leave him alone, ignore him and let him feel that he hurt you ok?But if you are willing to help him out of the vice, you have to suppport him and if you need to seek professional help then do so, all in your hands actually!cheer up, all things have solutions..

sunshine	You already know hes got u trapped he,llnot quit drinking he probly wants but its not easy and he needs alot never mind he doesnt want to quit take ur baby and run u didnt say u were married good luck u leave

staggerlee337	If I wanna drink more beer, I'm gonna drink more beer. (he says) So, you've got a 3 week old and a rotten, self-centered brat of a guy who will never grow up. Got news for you, honey. He's never going to think of anyone but himself. Not you, not baby, not even a we in there. It's all I ME MY, I ME MY. Time for you to do the same. You look out for you and baby. Stinky McDrunkerson over on the couch isn't concerned for anything but the monkey on his back.

David S	21-28 Beers only a week. Doctors order.

Stephanie	I can't believe this!!!!!! Your situation sounds exactly like mine, I mean exactly. It is creepy!!!! I stay at home with a 5 month old, a 2 year old and a 3 year old. I don't work. So, I am in his eyes not supposed to say anything because he bought it. He drinks at least 4 tall cans a night and way more on the weekend. We are living week to week as far as finances and I sort and pay all the bills with "his" money, but he don't want to see how broke we are and it never effects how much he drinks. The only time he don't drink is at work. He don't talk to me. He gives me dirty looks. It's like I'm alone but I'm not. He used to drink way more before we got together too. He falls asleep on the couch sitting up, but he is not drunk, he is tired and buzzed. I feel neglected and when he does get drunk he lets his true feelings about who brings home the money come out. How would they like to check into the going rate of a full time nanny these days??? If you think he is drinking too much and it is affecting you or making you feel bad, then YES it is too much. I could go on and on because I am confused too and if he is like mine he is impossible to talk to. I just let him know that yes I did know he drank when I got with him, but I did not swear to never get tired of it or to realize how much it really affects our relationship. Just because we knew it don't mean we have to like it or keep putting up with it. I think you should try to talk to him which I am sure you have like me, but make it clear that you can go to work if you have to and if he can't change then you can do it on your own and you can, especially with only one child. Don't give up. And don't have anymore children until you see how this is going to end up because finding childcare for one child to go to work is alot cheaper than 3. Anyway, I wish I could talk to you because I am totally feeling your problem. And my answer to your question is--- if his drinking brought you to ask this question on here, then yes he is because it is apparently causing a problem and just because you stay at home with that baby does not make your feeling any less important than his. As a matter of fact, I think that staying home cooped up, cleaning, washing clothes, being a maid and nanny pretty much takes more out of someone than just getting up and going to work feeling good about making a living and coming home to a clean house, clothes, and dinner. Sorry so long, but I read your question and it really hit home.

starfire	It's not so much the beer consumed as it is his behavior. 36 cans a week is little more than 5 cans a day. That is more than my husband drinks in a week unless there is a party we attend or we float down the creek with friends and BBQ that afternoon. And really if yours is drinking more than 36 a week he is headed down a bad road. I don't really understand "pulled my head in"... what does that mean? If you are not married I suggest you express your feelings to him and let him know that you will leave if he does not cut back. If your married you and he need to find some common ground. Best of luck to you....

John K	For some people one beer can be too much and for others there is no such thing as too much beer. He should respect your wishes and cut back. If he can not then he should get help and if he just wont then you can always leave him.

baserunner316	YEAH 36 is case a week isn't it??? a few a week isn't bad when your single but you have kids and you need to make him dial it back or talk seriously about divorce. what if he gets into a car accident and kills someone? what example is he setting for the kids???

LIL KIL	what do you mean 'if i pulled my head in' you should seek counseling even if he doesnt get drunk hes trying to escape an inner problem with all this drinking....

Lizzy	36 bears per week averages to 5 beers per day and a six-pack on Sunday. I think that is excessive, but the real test here is to ask these questions: Does his drinking ever get him in trouble? Does he get in trouble with his personal relationships (yes) or at work because of his drinking? Has he ever blacked out? Could he stop drinking? Go to the AA website for more information on this and also info on how you can handle this difficult situation.

..	any amount of BEER is too much BEER! dont drink it!

Sunny	Now there's a huge red flag. I don't even know what to say to you, I agree with you, but that won't change his attitude.

Jeff	He's an alcoholic and it's only going to get worse. He sounds like my Stepdad when I was young. He never quit or slowed down even when my Mom left him. He now looks 20 years older than he is and very lonely.......still drinking. Pathetic.

some female	While having a drink or 4 on occasion has its health benefits especially for men, your partner is drinking too much. Of course, he does have a point. You did know he drank a lot before he moved in and you don't contribute financially which likely adds a lot of stress and resentment to your relationship. It's only reasonable since you are essentially leeching off of him. Does that make his problem with alcohol any more acceptable? Not really, but the man has a point and the man doesn't want to stop drinking and doesn't appreciate you trying to change him. What do I suggest you do? Accept the man's choices in life and get off your butt and get a job. If you don't want to live with a drunk, then you're going to have to learn to support yourself and your children. Own up to your responsibilities. Alternatively, you could continue down this irresponsible route you have chosen for your life and you could just put up with the drinking, continue to live off his income and maybe eventually he'll stop or you'll guilt him into quitting for awhile, but you wouldn't be any better for it and your children certainly don't benefit from your irresponsible behavior.

bitches	he cares more about his beer than you, i am sorry. if he is not willing to change you need to take him to AA and if that doesnt work divorce. your child shouldn't be raised in an enviorment like that

lilbitbeechy	yikes u did know he has a valid argument u should have stopped his drinking before hand u r pulling your weight by taking care of the house and baby- that is a 24-7 job but how u get him to stop drinking I dont know my last ex was the ame way in fact i was his drinking buddy so why did i suddenly expect him to change when I did? it doesnt work like that he has to want to change dont fight him about it especially when he is under the influence get him sober and talk

TillieDillie	get out of that relationship. he will only get worse. then you will argue and he might get physical. take that baby and move somewhere safe. then if he wants you back insist he get help. check with a lawyer about the legality of the baby but it sounds like you are not married so the baby is yours until a dna test is done. just get out soon.

stephanidoege	I am sorry to tell you but I think you married an alcoholic. My dad was an alcoholic and while he never seemed drunk he did drink every day without fail. He was diagnosed with cancer at about 50 and quit drinking. It was then that i realized that while he never seemed drunk, i had never seen him sober in my entire life. When you say that the amount he drinks doesn't get him drunk all that means is that his tolerance has gotten higher and will continue to get higher the more he drinks. You ar in a tough position with having a new baby, but if he won't get help for his drinking leave him, both for your sake but even more for your baby's sake. You both deserve more than that. It is hard to leave someone but you will thank yourself in the long run. Good Luck

Mason M	I have the same problem. He started out slow like yours now he only drinks one night a week, but till he is so wasted. Any time anyone drinks even 4 a night it will affect the mood. Not to mention raising a kid that way they will see it and think that is a way of life.

Jai	He is drinking way too much beer. He needs help he has a drinking problem.

blueyedwakeboarder	Some people just like the taste of beer. I personally love to try new beers. 36 beers in a week isn't crazy but it is probably excessive. Maybe try to get him to try something different or engage him in something that takes away from his drinking. Do stuff together!

guinea girl	Go to Al Anon. They will help you answer this question. Medically, three ounces or three beers a day is considered HEAVY drinking. It will lead to early dementia (he'll get stupid at a younger age) and poor health. Sorry for your difficult situation.

starbrite.	it's not the beer but the man that needs it.IT'S A CRUTCH,AND SOME MEN NEED IT. If your husband loves you he will go to AA and get clean.NOT one beer in the house ever.he will start going to bars,because he won't let a wife tell him how to live. I cain't give you anymore that what i have.

Doc Biz	According to the the government "those who choose to drink alcoholic beverages should do so sensibly and in moderationâ€”defined as the consumption of up to one drink per day for women and up to two drinks per day for men." I would say anything beyond that is probably alcoholism (or bordering on it).

mezwood	Well, if he was a happy drunk then I'd say, let the man drink b/c he does work hard. BUT since drinking just makes him mean then I don't know. My husband drinks a six pack a day most days and I don't think it makes much difference in his attitude...most the time he gets in a better mood so I don't care. Your husband is a grown man and it's hard to teach an old dog new tricks. He's right though that you knew he drank alot when you met him, so you kinda knew what you were going to be looking forward to.

sergiospics	EDIT: Wow, I was a douche. I didn't read the whole thing. =( Now I feel bad for you. What you say he's drinking is way too much for a married man. I really don't know what to say. I hope everything turns out ok.