How much control should a husband have over their wife?

ramni222	wow! talk about extremes. however, we need to look at each item. if my wife wanted to call a man i would be unhappy. likewise, if i were calling some woman, she would have a right to be very unhappy. the other things are extreme. there may be something wrong with him or your marriage. maybe you gave him reason to be this way. is this possible?? have you ever been caught in a lie? have you ever had a relationship that he found out about? if there has been any bad history, it may account for the extremes.

Anne A	Perhaps in the time of Christ, or in the muslim world today this is an acceptable way to live. However, the only marriage I could tolerate is one of equal balance and partnership. No man is telling me who I can talk to or what I can by...

trapezist26	Definitely not. I want a protector and loving, respectful husband. I would never marry a controlling/possessive guy.

foxxyex	Although There Are Some Religions That Do Practice This, I Do Not Believe That's What Your Asking About. Marriage Is 100% No One Controls !!! Its An Equal. If Your Not Working And Spending way To Much Money Then He Should Tell You, If Your Friends Are Bad People Then He Should Tell You That Too..As Far As Leaving The House,do You Go For Days?Marriage Is NotCommunismm Or Slavery..ItsSharingg Your Life With Some One You Love, No One Is Boss!! You Both are EQUAL...

Complicated	This really made me laugh. I'd like to see him try this...oh wait, he kind of is...yeah, ok, lemme get back to you on this one. :)

Joy	That is not what God meant when he said that the wife is to be a help mate or is submissive to her husband. God meant for the man to be the head of the household but in these days, it takes two to make the home life work. God wants the wife to have 'respect' for her husband and be with him and only him, thus submission is to one man. No one, the wife or husband, is suppose to be a dictator to each other. We should go to each other with every thing that connects us to each other but we are not to be ruled over as a slave. Trust has to be applied in a marriage and a husband needs to trust his wife in those things that she will have free choice over. If he can't do that, he has a control issue. God meant that when we marry, we are to be subjected to no other person but our spouse and not that we are not to ask permission to do the every day common things.

blues breaker	a husband shouldn't have any "control" over his wife. just like a wife shouldn't have control over her husband.

openminded	I dont believe in a god. I say my man has no control over me we have respect for eachother so no control is needed. Submit to nobody unless you are dumb.

mamabear1957	These other women you speak of are either members of a fundamentalist church, a cult or they are married to control freaks!

Health-Food Junky	Ahh no! Last time I check it is the 21st century. Women can work, own property, drive, vote, etc. Why would we have freedom and a democracy to just be controlled by another. We fought for rights to be treated as a human with equal rights, why would we fight so long and hard to just say hey babe you can tell me what to wear, eat, see, spend, etc.

dad	Well they should be equal in all they do . But one of them has to be the chief if its the woman or the man preferably the person that has the better judgment then they should have the last word. But not controlling every move the other one makes .

cruisepuppy7452a	Ok, put down the bible and pay attention. Your husband has no rights to control you at all. ZERO. NONE. He does not have a right to tell you how to think, what to wear, eat, who to talk to, be with, NADA. Men that do this are called ABUSERS and use control as a means of fear to keep you in line. Its bunk, they act that way you show them the door. Period. Women that tolerate this have low self esteem and assume they can't keep thier men any other way. BUNK. They need counselling asap to show them its ok to be independant. If a guy can't handle it, the door and your boot is that way. Never let a guy control you ever. marriage is privledge, not a right to abuse or control another person. and since when did this become a religious issue? It's common sense.

wants to lose weight	No it is not ok for a man to TRY and control a woman! The only person people can control is theirself. This is a big problem i have with women like this! To just be submissive and do whatever the man says. Women Are independent creatures that can do what they need to do for themselves! So tell your friends to be strong and dont let a man run them! Best Wishes

RUBY	THAT IS CALLED A PARENT CHILD RELATIONSHIP. AND WHEN THE CHILD GROWS UP, THEY REBEL. THEN SEE WHAT HAPPENS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

fate	OMFG are you serious!?!??!?!?!?!?! Nobody has the right to control anyone!!!

msdoss2b	Submit doesnt mean DIE! to submit to your husband means to listen and negotiate a way where both can be happy..if you have trouble making friends who arent decent ppl and he DOESNT like them and you can see that then that is one thing but for him to DICTATE your life, is wrong! I am a housewife who travels with the pipeline as well as my mother and my grandmother...all who are housewifes...we dont bring in money the guys work hard 6 sometimes 7 days a week and yes super is on the table when they get home and yes the house is spotless....that is submitting and he DOESNT tell me who i can see, or talk to ...that is called controlling...that isnt what the bible describes.....PLUS the world is a much different place then what it was in the bible days

Harmony	A wife is not a child. It is not the husbands job to set rules and boundaries for her, forbid her, or discipline her. This kind of marriage can never be a partnership, but a domestic-dictatorship. In a marriage, neither spouse should submit to the others will. It is better for each spouse to work with the other to make a life that is equally beneficial. I would never be with a man who controlled me. If while I was dating I found out a man felt this way, I would have ended it before anything got near the point of marriage. The need to be in control is one of the biggest signs your spouse/partner is emotionally abusive. And to the below: "submit" does not mean negotiate. Submit means he has the final word, you are subordinate. Like a parent and teenager relationship, rather than a husband and wife. Many people would prefer death to the loss of their free choice.

Here's your change	And that type of man is the epitome of a weak, controlling, egotistic, ******. Normally those men have little self confidence, and little respect from any of his co-workers. He can't control anything around him, and chances are he's passed up time and time again for a promotion. Which in turn, makes him want to be in control of something, so he dominates the wife instead to make himself feel important. I'm an alpha female. And when I meet those types, I go out of my way to intimidate the hell out of them.

chichibaby	No one needs to be controlling no one, everyone should be an adult in a marriage and act like it.

â™¥Gabâ™¥	Come on! Your wife should do anything she wants, she is not your child. If you have insecuritys, go and fix them..your wife should not pay for that..and you are making her to miss the best part of who you are! What... God's will to submit!! We are in the years 2000 not 2000 before Christ! Leave her alone, she will respect you more then if you try to control her!

Dominics` Lady	As much as the wife allows! i would not like to be controlled like this if he wants a pet to control he can get a dog.

â™¥The Mrs.â™¥	No, no, no. Submitting is not about control, it is about respect. These men are not submitting to God's will to submit to him because they are not respecting their wives, but abusing them mentally. When a man's decision harms his wife, he is the one out of line.

can_you_accept_who_i_m	NO IT'S NOT NORMAL! No man, and I mean NO MAN has the right to control his wife. If he tries, it's because he's insecure with himself and is trying to control your every move to reassure himself. It is NOT God's will to submit, either. Men have created societal inequalities, not God.

freebird	IN my opinion no.The rule that women should be subservient and dominated by men was made by men. Most modern cultures have moved on since then.Men and women should have equal rights and freedoms.

alialoggi	Who determined that this is God's will? I don't remember seeing that in the bible. God didn't say that the men get to control the woman and the women get no spending money. People need to use their heads.

â™¥Gabbyâ™¥	As much as she has over him.

hotmoma	None! Nobody should control anyone!

Jessica S	Then you know a few idiots, this is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. If women are dumb enough to be treated like that, then let them. They Will never know how to live for themselves, the life they were given is not their own, so sad.

Stina Lady	No, it's not ok. Just because you're married doesn't mean that one or the other person has control. It's a partnership and built on trust. Controlling on the man's part is a sign of self esteem issues or mental abuse.

Trish	u do what you need to do.