I don't know what or how to feel about my husband going back to Iraq a 3rd time but this time for 15 months.

Kris	First of all, "Thank you", from a military spouse... my husband was medically discharged in 11/06 5.5 yrs into a 6 year commitment. I know that what you are dealing with is extremely difficult, and I would greatly recommend utilizing the benefits the military has to offer to give you and your family the support it deserves and needs. I relate dealing with "loss" to dealing with deployment... denial, anger, sadness... etc. I believe that is "unfair" that your husband has to go back for a 3rd time... I believe that all military members regardless of rank and mos should spend time being what the signed up for... "soldiers". However, unfortunately that is what they signed up for. It is wrong for people to join the military because the benefits are great, their job in the civilian world was going no where and yet most seem to forget that they signed up for combat... it wasn't in the fine print... it is common knowledge. I don't want to come across as unsimpathic because I AM NOT. I had many friends, 5 to be exact, who lost the partner in this war and I certainly feel that they would be alive had we not been chasing a poorly thought out pipe dream... however, after the stages of grief passed.. they found themselves stronger wives than ever before. Death is not something we want to talk about... but it is something that we as military families need to prepare ourselves for. We as spouse AND former spouses need to stick together, because the family unit that the military gives us... is NONEXISTANT in the civilian world, and I truely miss it. But most importantly, you need to be as supportive as you can be, because the last thing your husband needs is to worry about you while he is there... sad to say, but he has a lot more important to things to be worried about!!!

Kella G	Oh honey......what a tough time tou're having. This is the "other" side of war that people don't think about - the families living with the loneliness and the waiting. Spouses raising kids alone with the added stress of a partner in danger and often not contactable. No wonder you think it's unfair - it IS. I'm sure knowing that you're not the only one doesn't help much at all. Military familes make as great a sacrifice, in a different way, as the troops who leave them behind. I don't know what to say to you - It must be so hard. I hope it helps just a little to know that most people admire you greatly for your courage. Your husband is a lucky man. I hope he comes home healthy and much, much sooner than planned. Good luck.

jaded	i salute you for this sacrifice. you are my hero, you are a true hero. you are amazing. if you can, if at all possible, just write your worries here, dear, but try, if you can at all, not to let on to your husband, it will make him feel guilty and helpless. and that might not be good for him when he needs to keep his mind on staying whole and alive for you. keep on being supportive and cheerful, that is an old fashioned word, isnt it? bravery like your bravery and his bravery is old fashioned as well in this world that lives for the moment and seems at times to forget it's values. cheerfulness is what is needed here. i am glad you wrote here cause i want you to know i will pray for you and your son and his hero father. that i am proud of your sacrifice and the honor you bring other military wives. take care and know there are many people who care about you. i cannot say for sure that your husband will be ok. no one knows that. however, he is very experienced from being there before and that must count as a good thing that will help him stay safe.

Mr. Spin	You are feeling normal, and my heart goes out to you. A friend of mine has a husband also, in Iraq. They have a toddler, a 10 year old and high-school graduate. A tough situation financially. It is a shame, she qualifies for WIC ( to get free food for the toddler) and her husband has been risking his life for the USA in a volunteer army. He is definitely underpaid, and the government really doesn't care about these things. Anyhow, maybe I am misinformed about all of this, but in general I really feel for you and all of the wives, I wish there was a way that the solders served "enough time" in a fair way for all of them. It seems like your husband is carrying a big load and has served enough. Family is important too.

eniles21	I don't personally know anyone serving in Iraq, but my heart goes out to you. I get worried when I don't see my boyfriend for a few days, so I can't possibly think of where your mind is. I'm so sorry that you're going through this and it's ridiculous that they keep sending him back. Just keep your faith and know that you have a strong husband. I'm sure he will make it home safe and when he does, tell him I said to tell "Uncle Sam to kiss his ***" and unlist from the Army. Keeping you in my prayers.

rockgirlfury	My husband got deployed the same, and we too have children, and it was very difficult, you just have to keep your head up, and tell your son that daddy is fighting for the country, and tell him all of the good things about daddy.. My son is almost 3 and got to spend almost a year with daddy now that he is home, and i am glad i hung in there.... Whether he will come back ok, all you can hope for is for him to return safely, and if anything does happen, he will always be remembered as a hero.... I dont speak light of the situation, i know how it is, i was there not too long ago, but if you hang in there, Im sure all will be well. God Bless, and Good luck

MR MIYAGI	There is just no good, comforting answer for this question. I have a friend in the same situation.. Hopefully, we can get everyone home soon. The answer is in the 2008 elections, but that won't help in your case unfortunately.. Just know that a lot of prayers and thousands of Americans respect the sacrifice you and your family are making for all of us... and don't forget to vote the fools out of office in 08..

Holly H	I know how it feels to watch someone that you love walk out the door to back to some where, that they don't want to be. My best friend (which I love so much) is in Iraq. The only thing you can do is prey for him and tell your sons everyday that their daddy loves so much. Hang on, its hard. I might not be a military wife, but I know how you feel worrying about that one person that you love

HereweGO	Tell your two year old son what a wonderfully great and courageous man he has for a father. Tell him how brave his daddy is and what a TREMENDOUS sacrifice he is making for him and you, for all of us. My heart goes out to you!!! Be Strong, I pray for you every night. God Bless!!!

Maddison	I'm sorry to hear that... and if you're venting it's ok. very understandable!

majat888	Iam so sorry to hear that. My son just left for there, leaving a 3yr old beautiful girl and a pregnant wife. He will be gone for 15 months also. I put my son and his family in Gods hands and pray for him to protect his heart and body. I hope you have close friends and family that you can turn to. My prayers are with you my friend. God Bless you and your family.

mamabear	I can't imagine how hard it is for you to go through this. All you can really do it pray. Pray for him to return home to you safe and sound.

Whitnie d	Thank you to your husband for his service. It is a wonderful cause to keep us safe and he will always be a hero to your son and others for fighting for his freedom and that of his fellow Americans.

Belen	I am so sorry to hear that. I can feel your sorrows and deep concern for the safety of your husband. Just to let you know that I am one soul who will be sincerely praying for his safe return. Meanwhile, take good care of your baby and yourself. Please let me know when your husband comes home. God bless you and your family.

MaRaNdA	It is very unfair!! Thank you for serving our country !! Your son is 2 he won't remember daddy not being there when he gets older just make alot of home videos when he is home and show them to your son. If you have a DVD camcorder maybe you guys could send your husband videos of "family " also Good Luck to you and Thank you again

schoolaccount04	I would say just stick with your ideals. Were you originally a supporter of the war? Do you still think the war is just? All war comes with sacrifice. Yes your husband, in my opinion has served his time, and this feeling is strengthen by the fact that I do not believe in this war. Unfortunately our military is stretched extremely thin, and multiple tours can not be avoided, especially with the surge. However all I can say is that if your ideals are satisfied, hold strong knowing that we're all rooting for him, and that hopefully this war will end soon.

Kimberly M	Everything will be ok! Get him a laptop and a webcam and use it whenever you can! My son was 2m old when his daddy left for Iraq the 2nd time and I had him talk to him on the computer whenever we could and tell him thats daddy and he would say hey and wave. When he came home for leave, 9m after he deployed, my son ran right up to him like he never left. As long as your husband is smart and careful he will come home to you! You have to be brave for him that way he won't be distracted worrying about you. If he got stopped lawed for this tour then he will be able to get out as soon as he gets back so after that you will have nothing to worry about! Don't worry things will get better day by day! Good luck with your tour!

Yggdrasil Mithos Symphonia	Damn! That's so not right. Prayers be with you. (i'm keeping my politics to myself this time)

Angelic Valentine	Try your best to stay positive. With you thinking like that it is making you miserable, and your son does not need a miserable mom all of the time.....especially with your husband being gone for so long. If you stay that way, your son will not only be without a dad for the time being, but will not have what he needs from his mom either. Do it for him. Just tell him the truth. Tell him that he is working and they made him work even though he did not want to, and would rather be at home with him instead. Just do not lie to him about things like that.

jennie	agree w/2nd answer that you're a strong person & thank you

ciao_gina	Does your husband agree with or understand the reason that we are in Iraq? Support him most of all and then get angry at this stupid war and idiotic lying President. Write letters to your local Congress person and Senator. Get involved to make a change.

Derick	Hang in there. You in your children are soldiers too. Best wishes.

precious	I feel for you.... I hope he will come home to you and your son safely.... I'll pray for you and your family......

bmattj121	I sympathize with you. Having been deployed twice in as many years, I couldn't help but feel that the burden was being borne by a few of us while so many went without sacrifice. It makes things all the harder when the political machine turns your misery into political capital. I wish you and your family the best. God Bless.

HiketheWild09	I have the highest respect for you and your husband. Has he taken this up with his chain of command. I believe that he can at least address this as a family grievance? something like that.... Otherwise hang in there a little longer. Find ways of getting by until he returns.

Sunshine	Let go and Let God and hope he returns to you and pray or tell them he has a bad back and he can't go that's how my ex got out of the navy

Mrs J	It impossible for me to tell you how to feel. Only you would know that. For starters you can tell your son the same thing you've been telling him. "Daddy is in the war. He is doing a very important job. The boss thinks Daddy is doing such a good job that they want him to stay" It is most likey you are feeling abandoned. that he has done his job over there and now he has to do his job to his family. Down deep you are probably feeling afraid that he won't come home alive at all. What can you do aobut it? Nothing. The military has all the power. but when your husband ever does come home, tell him what you are feeling and ask him to stay home.

spadezgurl22	i dont have a military husband but i think u are a brave woman to stand behind ur husband. its def going to be tough and troubling. take lots of pictures so ur husband will be there in spirit. know that he will be thinking about u and his son. its going to be hard for him to be away from u too. bless u and ur family.