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I just told my husband I want to get divorced. What does this mean when he doesn't seem to be upset?
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I just told my husband I want to get divorced. What does this mean when he doesn't seem to be upset?

He said he is willing to try to work it out but he is not going to beg me to stay. He doesn't seem to be upset. We can talk civil.

just visiting
he's probably tired of the fighting, and is worn out. Ater a certain time, even though you don't really want to loose that person, It's just been enough. Maybe you'll get along better when you dont live together!

In d 1st place, wat does it mean when u want a divorce, it mean u dun want him anymore..u dun love him..Y should he tear for someone who is hurting him deeply at this moment..I like his straight forward decision, not wishy washy..His mentality, if it meant to be, it meant to be...If it not, no point forcing, crying or even begging. And u noe wat, this reverse Psychology work ON u..
U had d tot tt he will beg n cry..but he didnt..And perhap seeing him so Rational, u may give him a 2nd chance to wk thing out.

it means he has thought about it before too and u jus beat him to asking him or he clearly sees u dont like him anymore and he is not gonna stay with someone who obviously doesnt like him back

HE saw it coming and he wants a divorce too...

Wow he's not going to fight for you at all? I think that says everything that you need it to say. It says that you arent worth fighting for as far as he's concerned.

Sounds like he is ok with it. Maybe, he wanted you to finally ask for one. At least he is not going crazy about it.

He has seen it coming. Why do you want him to be upset if you want out? Should his whole world crash because you want it to?

I think he is prolly in a state of shock right now and really doesn't know what to say or how to act. He isn't going to beg you to stay because who wants to stay with someone who doesn't want to be with them?

it was time/he agrees

maybe your husband wants out too and he has not had the heart to tell you. so by you saying you want a divorce he feels releaved that he didnt have to do it.

maybe he wants the same thing, is this something you say to him often? if so maybe he is just numb from all of your threats. I would make sure this is what you really want before you go through with it because if you are un sure, most of the time there is NO going back.

Well I think that's a good thing that he's not upset. Maybe he realize that you are not happy and he knows that he can't make you happy. And he probably wants you to be happy.

Sounds like the two of you may have something in common--you both want a divorce.

What did you expect him to be shocked and scream and yell and beg?! That's very conceited on your part! Most divorcing couples would love a peaceful split like this. You cant be a shock as your marriage has clearly been in disrepair for sometime now. He has agreed to try to solve your issues and that in itself seems to be more positive than your statements. If you want to make a try at it them he is willing if not then head to courthouse should be very easy since he agrees

You have to ask yourself why it bothers you that he is not upset. Do you really want a divorce or did you just want him to talk you out of it? If you truly want one, be glad that he is not upset and maybe your divorce will be civil and fair. A rare thing.

‚ô•Spiky Sandy‚ô•
Sounds like he's ok with your request. Why are you so worried now? You've asked, he's complied, you got what you want.

It means that he's pretty tired of putting up with your crap (same as you are tired of his crap, I imagine) and he isn't going to beg you to stay. If you want to stay and work it out, he will work with you; if you want to pack your stuff and get out, he'll hold the door for you.

It's up to you, in other words. I could be wrong, but it sounds a little bit like you don't really want a divorce - instead, you want your husband to be so dependent on you that the thought of you leaving causes him to crumble into dust. That's probably not going to happen. So decide what you want, and then act in a way that will cause it to happen.

Best wishes and God bless.

I think maybe that's just one way to deal with pain. Sometimes stubborn people (such as myself) don't show emotion in times like that cause we don't want to look weak. I don't know him so I can't say for certain but that could be the case.

it means he was probably thinking divoce too but didnt want to say it first. good luck to you.

he's probably been pushing your buttons so you'd say it first....now you're going to have to pay for it

he's probably just as unhappy as you are and is glad that you are the one who's initiating the divorce.

Katherine B
Could be because he is happy about the split or he could be playing with your head.He might be thinking if I don't act upset,she might think i have someone else and be jealous and want to stay.Good luck either way.

He is probably wanting out as much as you.Remember men just dont have the balls enough to say it.They rather put it all on you,like its your fault.Best thing is to do him and yourself a favor leave his butt!!Go be happy find someone you can talk to and someone who will listen just as well good luck!!

I like Lexy's answer. I was just too slow to type it first. Dadgum! I must be quicker with my answers. :) Good Luck (Ha! Didn't wish her luck did you Lexy?). I've been on this computer too long I think I am starting to lose it.

Try a few sessions of marriage counseling. Even if it doesn't save the marriage, it could bring out some of the problems, help you understand them which you may need to know in order to have closure and move on from this marriage. Best of luck to you.

Sounds like you want to know if he really loves you. Maybe he is confused just as you are and is at the end of his rope as well. Talk about your feelings towards one another. Bring up the happy times when you first met maybe there will be a spark.

I think you both have realized it is over and are finally willing to do something about it. I would not be upset if this is what you really want be happy he will not fight you on this. It will be less messy that way.

This probably was not a huge revelation. You have probably been having problems for a while. Like you, he does not want the relationship to continue with the same problems. Try some counseling. It may or may not work, but is worth the try.

It may mean that he realizes things weren't working out before you even asked for the divorce. Maybe he just didn't want to be the one to initiate the break up and now he's relieved that something is being done about the failed relationship.
Or, it could be that he may be slightly in shock and will be more upset later when he has time to think about it.

a V a
I think u got the wrong idea. He must be upset otherwise he won't say that to u, otherwise what is in the first place u got married?
He has already said he is willing to work out and solve the problem but u are insisting on the divorce not giving him a chance, what can he say more? Begging u not to divorce him? A man cannot do that. They also have their value and faces. He do loves u, this is waht i feel, otherwise he won't care about "work it out" at all. He still cares about u.
It's up to u whether giving him a chance and to yourself also. If u want to save this marriage and start all over again, u can do that. But the problem is, do u want to do it?
Don't rush to divorce. Though i'm still 21 and haven't get married yet, but i do know the feeling of giving up on things.. It's possible that u will regret. This is the least thing i want and i don't think u want it also? So why not give both of u a chance? Talk to him nicely and patiently, see whether u can make through it?

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