If you just got married...?

leadfoot126	I think that would definitely not be a good thing. There comes a time when separation of family is best.

bmattj121	I love my mom to death, but I don't think her moving in would be a good idea. It's just not healthy for your new phase in your relationship. When I just got married, the first 6 months were crucial in determining what our roles were as a married couple. We learned so much about each other and how to work with each other when we shared a home. To have another influence, especially one as significant as your mother adding to that process would most likely be unhealthy both for your relationship with your spouse and your mother.

Nikki	This is your MOTHER, the woman that gave birth to you. The least you can do is let her stay with you for 3 months. She supported you for years. I think you should let her stay.

ashlea o	no.

STPabroad	ABSOLUTELY NOT! Did you see "You, Me and Dupree"? It's a catastrophe waiting to happen. You and your husband need time alone together to solidify this new stage in your relationship. If your mother has other options, she needs to exercise them.

brownskin	i would say no. you are right you need to live together on your own before you do something like that.

jhg	Good job for saying that it was not o.k.!! Even though you said no that does not mean that you don't love your mom or respect her, that just means that you needed that time with you and your husband. Have you tried telling your mom that? Tell her that "mom I want you to know that the reason I said no at that point wasn't because I don't love your, or cared about your situation, or respect you as my mom. It was because..." and just tell her the truth in love. If she is still taking up offenses all you can do is just keep doing what is right and the rest is something she will have to deal with. You are not responsible for your mom's happiness or for how she responds to situations in life. So don't let yourself feel guilty. Just make sure that everything has been put out there for her in an honest way and leave the rest up to her. Hope it all works out.

taljalea	It is not always a good idea to have relatives live with you or near you when you are in your first few years of marriage. I was married a year to my now ex husband when we decided to buy a mobile home and place it on his parent's land on a spot that had held a mobile home previously. It was a good deal for there was no lot rent and all we had to worry about was the house payment. The downside to it was that nearly all of our marital life was subject to his parent's knowledge. No matter what it was they had to have their say in it from the marriage to raising our only child at the time. My ex did not even step up for me when they did not like things I thought were good ideas and actually they could give opinions but that was all since it was me and him that were married not me married to his family which in the end was what it turned out to be....so no...not at first. Now my grandmother, my mom's mother, did live with us on two occassions growing up but for only about a few months as she waited for an apartment. But my parents had been married 10 plus years and grandma knew to keep her nose out of their business.

baby	well i would ask your spouse to see how they feel....

Andrea	hey, family helps out family right? but i guess that depends on how close you two are. hopefully she knows that she needs to give you guys some space though...

sophia_of_light	Probably, But I would first ask her if she can divided her stay with others so that she is not there an a reg. base.Not that you don't want her there it's just that it's a new marriage and you haven't adjusted yet to this yourself and with her being there it might be even harder for you to do that. What does your husband say ask his opinion and go from there, there might be a happy medium somewhere yous all can live with.

Flower Girl	Probably, but I don't know how happy I would be about it. But I also know my mother wouldn't do something like that, especially if she had other options.

-	no way, if my dad asked, then yes definately, but not mom.

casapulla2001	Why not? Sparing the drama, for a second: you're already married. It's not like she's moving in right after the Honeymoon, after picking you up at the airport... She ever do anything for you? It's your mother, for crying out loud. (tell your hubby to relax, 3 month or 6 months isn't the end of the world, and as you may know.. people don't say IN the house 24/7...) do her a favor, do the right thing. So, you don't walk around in high heels & get bent over the sofa EVERY night... you can practice, for when you have kids this way... PS -- She'll be living with you in 30-40 years (or less) anyhow. This is a dry run.

Happy	You need to be with your new husband to enjoy the new things together.If there is other places she can stay let her stay there.I love you want to do what is right so just make sure you make the decision with your husband

Jumpin' Catfish	HELL NO!!!!!!

Kitty	I wouldn't think twice about having either my mom or his mom live with us for a short while. Granted, by the time we "just" got married, we had lived together for over a year, so marriage didn't change our living arrangements. However, if we had not lived together, I don't think my mom would even ask for such a favor (she's very tactful) - and she certainly wouldn't hold it against us if we said no.

Niko	No. If she has other options then she should go to them first. You and your husband need time alone to adjust. Even if you had lived together before (which I see you haven't) you still have adjustments! :) I wouldn't worry about it.

his wife	No no and lol no again

VERNON C	it would be hard for you both to live with someone else when you both have not lived with each other. it take two. lots of giving and little taking. that is part of being married. it take time to find out how you both live and what each other likes to live. then if you throw in someone else it will be very hard to adjust.

Makela H	Well she is your mother and it is kinda unfair to ask you if she can live with you and your husband right after you two got married so make a deal with her let her stay a week or two instead of 3 months. And after she has to go with her other options.

Catherine	Sounds like your husband needs to get over himself and just deal with it for 3 months. It's not like it's a permanent situation.

GingerGirl	I wouldn't have let her move in either. I can't really believe she would even ask.

CHERISH	yes because thats my mother

C~Luv	I gotta say, I most definately can relate, only reverse the rolls...we live with my husbands family. We just married in July. We never lived together prior to this, either. I gotta admit that it's quite difficult to live with other people. I'm finding out that there is no privacy for "ANYTHING"! I feel that there are certain things that are to be kept solely between husband and wife, and this can't seem to be done living with other people. They seem to be very opionative about things that don't really concern them. I'm not gonna draw out my answer, cuz I could go on and on, but I will say that it has not worked out in our best interest so far and it hasn't been long since we've been staying there. I would recommend her to utilize her alternate routes, if possible. You know what its like to live with your mom and you know how she is period...do you think it would turn out ok? After all, 3 months isn't long, but depending who it is, it can seem forever...decide carefully. As a married women you took vows under God's eyes. If he is against it and doesn't wanna seem to give in on this one...I don't blame him personally, but there should be your answer for you. You should never go against your spouse, if it makes him uncomfortable then you should know he's just not being an ***, after all you married him. I'm sure that one of the qualities you fell in love with him, was his decision making, or why else would you feel secured enough with him to get married. Good luck and God bless...I know its a difficult decision based around 2 people you love dearly. I hope they understand you when your decision comes in play.

cobrasnake	answering your question: No.

wanabe30	I think you are right not to have your mother move in so soon after you got married.

Promised Attitude	I would have to say... no. The beginning of your marriage and the quality time that you spend during this time can not be set aside for a later date. I believe your focus should be with each other, without the added stress of a guest at this most special and wonderfull time in your lives.

tcc_00676	rent her a room

Jerdy	Should be your priority!