Is It Always "The Other Woman's" Fault?

Neto	its kinda sad tht your sis ter sees it that way it true she not making him do any thing he doesnt want to but she didnt stop him ither.... she knew about his situation and should of said you know this isnt right you have a wife at home.. instade of being with the gut.. and no its not the wives fault at alll! its her horny husbands fault for not being able to wrk things out with his wife and your sisters fault for going along with this relationship when she knew it was wrong to begin with ...

Candle Queen	I say both are at fault. It's the husband's fault for wanting to go outside of the marriage instead of trying to fix what's broken between he and his wife. It's the other woman's fault because "if" she knows he's married and continues a relationship with him that's a definite no no and she should have more about herself than to want to be in 2nd place.

J'adore	Your sister's action aren't really the best. It's is a little bit dishonest to be sleeping with a married man. However, I completely agree that it's the man fault. Ultimately, he made the decision to cheat. Your sister is right, she isn't forcing him to do anything. His decisions are his own. If it wasn't your sister, it would be another women. This man knows he has a wife and he knows the consquences. If my hubby was cheating, I would not blame the other women. I would question her morals, but would I hunt her down and ***** her out. NO!! I'd be disgusted with my husband who made a legal and spiritual commitment to me in marriage. I would be betrayed by him and completely blame him. If he wasn't happy in our marriage, he could have handled it differently. That's why there is marriage counseling and divorce. I would blame him for doing something he knew was wrong and dishonest toward me. It's not the other women. Men are big boys and capable of making their own decisions. Cheating men have their wives' pictures in the back of their mind. But, they still don't care. Are you going to tell me that disrespect and lack of uncaring is the "other womans" fault. No, it's the husbands. Also, a man can't be secuded unless he wants to be. I'm sure LOTS of men have been secuded by women and have said, "F-off, I'm married." Cheating is a choice. Seduction is an excuse.

litttlehead	I think both people are at fault, and both are responsible enough to know better. But when blame comes into play? I'd say the man is MORE at fault I suppose. I mean, I doubt it's possible for a woman to break up a completely perfect, happy marriage if the man was not first looking or at least willing to cheat. But that doesn't mean your sister doesn't know better still, you know?

starryeyed	she is at fault, she is willingly contributing to interrupting their marriage. Yes its his fault too but this does not excuse her she has no business being with a married man

leopard lady	It takes two here...I'm sure this man didn't put a gun to your sister's head and force her to sleep with him, so it's just as much her fault as it is his. Marriage is sacred, your sister should be ashamed of herself. And I don't care what type of person his wife is, no one deserves to be cheated on.

?	its all the people involved flat

Miss Blue & Riley too.	omg if my sister said that i'd slap her down. It's the husbands fault for not being man enough to tell his wife "hey, we have issues" or "we need to split up" He's taking the easy way out and so is your sister. Blaming someone else for something YOU are doing, makes it easier for you to cope. How does your sister like being "a homewrecker" obviously doesn't mind it. And the man who is cheating on his wife is a poor excuse for a man. I'm really sorry but if that was my sister I would be royaly pee'd off and probably wouldn't speak to her. Might sound extreme but what she is doing is dreadful.

whyteangel11	What your sister does not realize is no man will turn down free pus.....y. Not having enough intimacy in a marriage is not the problem, men find any reason to stray if another woman offers. It is up to each individual to respect and value your partner and do unto them as you would want them to do unto you. I don't believe you can get an honest answer from a man on this question.

MysticalMisty	I guess technically she is not holding a gun to his head..... but she is part of the problem. And she really does not know what is going on between him and his wife. His wife may be the sweetest and most intimate gal in the world...but the guy just cannot be satisfied with one woman. Which if he cares about anyone but himself...should leave and be with the one he wants. And who knows...maybe your sis is not the only "other woman" either. Then what would she say? She can't satisfy him either? The most to blame is the one cheating.... but the other person...also knows what they are doing is wrong.

Â¤Â»Sarrah	Both their fault. I hope some girl seduces your sisters future husband

Dave	They are both at fault. I am sure one day your sister will be cheated on.

Neishi	I do believe what your sister is doing is morally wrong. But it is not her relationship she is hurting she does not actually have to be faithful. Why is it always the woman who gets the blame if the situation was switched the woman would still be looked down upon badly more so then the male. I think you should ask your sister if she really wants to be with this man and if so if he can do this to his wife he will certainly do it to her as soon as their relationship falls into a rut.

letterstoheather	When a person cheats on their spouse, it's not "the other woman's" fault -- or "the other man's".. but anyone who has an affair with a married person, has a lot of disrespect for THEMSELVES.. Your sister may not want someone who can make a committment, as well.. so he's "safe"... People cheat for thousands of reasons, so why blame someone? If a marriage isn't working, and if the couple wants to fix it, they need to take steps for improvement.... no one else can fix their mess. take care.

lwomar	No, its both parties fault. But he is the one that took the marriage vows so he is really in trouble with more than just his wife. No she is not forcing him, but she is a homewrecker and helping him to destroy his marriage. His wife could be satisfying him, catering to him and everything a husband would desire, but he just has this need to go elsewhere, and there was your sister to be the convenient one.

nicky	Its everyones fault. the spouse whocheats for not going to his or her partner and communicating there a problem first and the other lover or significant other for dealing with anyone who says they are married.....i've heard it before.."we have problems' but who doesnt... what is that other person going to do for that relationship but make matters worse. I met my ex while he was having problems with his wife...and 3yrs later they are still married with more problems and i got what?????? F u kk e d in the end......

free_angel	Your sister wants to justify her wrong actions.

BabeHart	The person who cheats is at fault, period...no matter how terrible one's relationship is they can choose to end it rather than become a cheater. However, this doesn't take all responsibility off the single playmate of the cheater. That person is condoning cheating and thus saying it's okay if they are cheated on in the future. Bad karma...but being human, we tend to be able to justify just about anything we want to do (whether our justification has any solid basis or not).

truly	The other woman is at fault for being such a loser that she has to have a married and unavailable man. The man is at fault for breaking his vows. The wife may or may not be at fault depending on how she was treating her husband before all of this happened.

jackie	personally i think all are at fault the mistress even more if she knows the man is married. the man or woman cheating definently because they know they are married and cheating. If the wife/ husband knows they are not keeping their spouse happy then does nothing about it they are partially at fault too. I am not saying any of this behavior is ok by any means, however i can see from all points of veiw and very seldom is anyone innocent.

shebae	IT TAKES TWO TO TANGO . WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND . YOUR SISTER IS A BOOTY CALL , NOTHING MORE AND HE MOST LIKLY WOULDNT THINK OF LEAVING HIS WIFE. CANT YOUR SISTER GET A MAN OF HER OWN? A WOMAN WHO DATES A MARRIED MAN ISNT CONSIDERED MUCH.

Phoenix	Honestly, I believe that a true, strong, and happy union cannot be broken up. A happy union is great, but if it isn't strong it can be broken. For example, spouses can be happy with eachother, but being that no union is perfect, one partner can stray because of one imperfection. The couple is happy and very much in love, but one partner wanted to fulfill themselves with someone who offered more of what their partner lacks. So what do they do?: Typically they break up. But if two spouses have a strong union, and know the true meaning of marriage, they have more of a chance in working it out, therefore thier union was not broken. And if they are happy with eachother, and the unfaithful spouse is grateful for the forgiveness and acts accordingly, they can last for a lifetime. So with this said a marriage needs not only happiness, but strength for it not to be broken. And personally, I feel that a woman shouldn't have to worry about her husband straying just because she doesn't offer him intimacy very often. But she should take heed to the fact that just as us as women have needs, our men do too. Not to say we should have unconsensuate intimacy just for them, but to realize that intimacy should be relished in when it comes to two people that are in love with eachother. And if there is a reason why a woman doesn't wish to be intimate with her man, whether it's from loss of love, or anything else, that should be confronted and dealt with. Lastly, when it comes to a married man being unfaithful it is more so his fault. He as a man should confront his wife with what she is obviously lacking for him to cheat in the first place, and work with her so that she can be stronger with that attribute. And if he feels that she isn't able to work on it, and it's important enough that he needs to be with another woman to get it, he needs not to be with his wife. And when it comes to the other woman, she is absolutely wrong for sharing herself with another woman's man. But at the end of the day, she isn't getting all she deserves either because that man is truly not hers.

Darcy	Its both parties fault. He should have more self control. If there are problems in his marraige he should work them out, not go 'sneaking around' with someone else to get his 'rocks off'!! She should have enough self respect and dignity, to leave someone who is married alone. Why would a woman knowingly go after a man who was married? Yes she should feel guilty, because she is not giving him or his wife the opportunity to 'save' their marriage or to try to work things out. Going after a married man shows 'lack of moral character'.

justagorilla	if the lovelife in the marriage is bad, I wouldn't want to be in it. does not mean I would cheat, though. if your sister was in the other woman's shoes, It would ironic justice. your sister is a tramp. the man is at fault...

that judi	Affairs are rarely about intimacy issues. I never understood blaming the "other" person in an affair....the person you exchanged vows with (ans the cheater) is the person who is violating the vows. The other person in the affair is a willing participant and capable of making choices, even horribly bad ones. Having an affair is never a wise nor healthy choice and the cheater will usually blame everyone before he/she takes any responsibility for it himself (herself).