Is married life really as bad as it seems?

Zebra4	There are two kinds of marriage. One is the legal kind, created to ensure a man (back in ancient times) would provide for the woman and children, rather than just get her pregnant and leave. The other is the REAL kind that doesn't happen on paper but in the heart. The reason the legal kind doesn't work is that it's based on money, not love. The REAL kind doesn't need paperwork because it's based on love, so it happens naturally.

Zimone78	You got to put in time and effort for everything. Love might exists for the first few years but after that, it takes a lot of hard work to get the sparks going. Both parties need to play their part.

I Like Grapes	Marriage can be a wonderful thing, you often see couples arguing becasue that's what husband and wife do. At first marriage can be very hard but when couples work at it it gets easier, fighting is just a part of life, it dosent mean that they dont love each other, it just happens.

stellabella	Depends on who you marry, and why you marry. Marriage is like any relationship, it has its ups and downs, but it does require you work at it. Communication is the most important, talking about how you feel about things like money, raising your children, etc. Working as a team is important as well. I think also taking time out for yourselves, doing something fun that you both enjoy. Its easy to grow apart. I think that you love more after you marry but it evolves into a different type of love. Its important to be friends too, have a sense of humor, and enjoy each other. I would marry the same guy again in a minute.

soccer allie <3	bad? no way! if you find your perfect match, it will be a life changing experience (good way)!!!!

tracieisland	yes. lol

qtpie	Marriage is not easy. In the beginning it's all sweet and cute. But then reality sets in and you're with this person forever. I think marriage is the best thing that could have happened to me. I have a wonderful son and we have the best relationship (my husband and I). As my mother says...No one said it would be easy.

PatricksMom*	Me and my husband seem to fall in love with each other a little more everyday. Of course there are going to be fights, the fights are what make you realize that you are in love and how fighting is useless. It also gives you a great reason to make up! Don't worry about what other people do/seem to do. As long as you are in love with your soon to be spouse or boyfriend when you do get married everyting will be perfect as long as you make it that way. Never get married for the wrong reasons. I told myself when my husband proposed that by the time of the wedding if i could as myself that if i was not with this man if i feel like i would be losing everything. It will be fine!

mobildik	Marriages undergo a lot of changes with almost all married couples. There are good times, financial issues, raising kids, differences of opinions, other people interferring, office flirting and or romances, school selections, birthdays, graduations, kids marriages (and divorces) health issues and even deaths. Many many couples have been thru it all and remain true and married. It's called life and marriage and its truly wonderful and worth it. Does love lessen after marriage.............Not really.....even though there are those uneasy times. Have celebrated 42 anniveraries and looking forward to #43 shortly.

Nocurfew313	i think its harder because it takes more work in a marriage than a relationship.

*never give up*	well, mines not. you may see bickering, but you are not seeing the times they show affection. my husbands my best friend, and i think as long as you can accept and love each other (faithfully), and communicate, then marriage is wonderful. you have to understand that everyones lives have ups and downs, and in a marriage its times 2, plus the ups and downs of the children

Mastang	There are pros and cons. Married life is not boring its just your total freedom is lost. Beside this you have something to expect everyday. For men its really not a great experience if his wife can not even cook good food beside being nagging.

abc	Married life, like single life, is a good or bad as you choose it to be. Love deepens after marriage; lust lessens after marriage; if you marry someone who is your friend and you treat each other with respect you will have a lifetime of happiness...even when you have to go through rough times.

TJ	ABSOLUTELY!!!

lucky	my parents by far have the greatest marriage...they're in love with each other even after 27years. i think nowadays people get married too quickly and it all to often ends in a nasty divorce, what some people don't realize is that it is something you work on, communication, not being selfish, put the other one first, there are just some married people who don't get that and it makes them unhappy.

Candy L	i think its just as bad as dating honestly if your in a relationship then you know what marriage life is like you fight just the same

Seldom Seen	Marriage is something you have to nurture and work on throughout. Good marriages don't happen without the couple nurturing their relationship and keeping it fresh. For example, some married couples don't date each other after they have been married for awhile. They should go out on dates with each other just like they did before they got married. They need to make time for this. Also, they should not fall into a routine. Life is full of routines (go to work, take the kids to school, etc.), but married couples can spice things up by exploring different hobbies or activities every once and awhile. Marriage gets boring if the couple let it get boring. You have to make it fun and exciting.

sweetgranny06	its better to stay single than wind up with a abuser and who cheats

B K	Sorry to be a bit cynical, but you can abandon all hope for a sweet happy life. There is plenty of tension, conflict, and disagreement. If both people don't belive in talking and COMPROMISE and laughing at themselves, you're in for a world of hurt. Marriage will bring out the best and worst in both people.

torhelious	Well..the reason you see people who are married fighting all the time is cause people now a days marry for the wrong reasons. If 2 people get married who are ACTUALLY in love. The Marriage is great. Also.. There have been many cases where 2 people get along better as B/F, G/F than they do married.

GuardDog	it's not as bad as it looks, IT'S MUCH MUCH WORSE! I'd rather be eaten alive then married, because even if I was eaten alive I wouldn't have to suffer as long.

mark m	Absolutely not!!! Its great! It is what you make it and what you put into it. Keep your expectations realistic....

Amy	How much do you value trust? Would you enjoy a life of total trust from and for another person? Someone who will love you when you wake up in the morning and your breath stinks, and your eyes are all crusty - hair's a mess? How about when you're sick, and grumpy? Beautiful and primped? Someone to take care of, and be taken care of from. Being married is both joyous and hard work. You have to put effort into it every single minute of every single day. The best advice I got before I was married was to "Keep my eyes wide open before tying the knot, and half shut after". While you need to be absolutely certain before you're married, once you are, you have to ignore the little things, and greatly appreciate the rest. Being married truly CAN break you apart, but it can also bring you nearer to another person than you can ever imagine! The good news: not becoming one of "those couples" is your choice. You will get absolutely ever ounce of effort back, that you are willing to put in to your marriage. No matter how frustrated, angry, whatever, you are NEVER EVER take your spouse for granted. Never believe it won't work! That is one of the world's greatest lies! Instead take a few seconds to breathe and reflect on the things you adore about them. Go out of YOUR WAY every day to do something nice for them. You will be greatly rewarded.

soldierlady226	Married life does take a lot of both parties to work. It ca at times be hard and it is also wonderful. If both parties give and take from the marriage it is fine if their is one taker and one giver then there is a problem.

Kat	love does not lessen after a marriage it gets stronger. You must be around married people that aren't very happy. I've been married 25 years. Sure there are ups &downs but they are always fixable. You are the one that will have to find someone you trust with all of your soul. You wanted to hear a story. A few weeks ago my husband a terrible wreck in our truck. I was not home at the time, But I was waiting for him to call me when he got home. We have always called each other. After 3 hours went by and he should have called me no longer than 1 1/2 hours I knew with every fiber of my soul he had a accident. I called our son who is 23 and told him I know Dad crashed off the canyon. He called our daughter who called the CHP and yes there was an accident. My kids caught up with ambulance thier Dad was in. The reason I knew he had crashed is our love is so strong I felt it. My husband went off aa 200ft drop he had fallen asleep. Then he climbed back up to the road. He came out with minor injuries. Our love and the Lord kept him alive. So ya see love can & does last forever. I am even closer to my husband now than before and I didn't think that was possible. Your spouse needs to be your best friend, someone you can always count on no matter what and they count on you it's 50-50 no matter what anyone says. I hope you find your true love

zen522	In a marriage people forget that they still need to work on US Like you do when you first meet someone.

inkantra	It doesn't lessen, but it does change. Part of the initial heart-pounding excitement of love is not knowing. Not knowing if your partner feels THE SAME, not knowing if they have the same feelings about a relationship as you do, not knowing where the future will lead. When you are married, much more is certain. You KNOW that person will be there for you in the dead of the night. You KNOW that you have a true partner through thick and thin. You KNOW that your children will look up to a wonderful mom or dad. You KNOW just what your partner likes in bed, and you get it back in spades. Some may interpret married life to be less exciting, but there is as much excitement as you make the effort for. The key is to focus on the relationship now and then, not just the "paying the bills" of life.

HPA	At the beginning love is in the air,but after one or two years, the kids are coming,bills and all other costs,you will have more and more obligations and usually husband will just work on his job and sleep in the afternoon or fooling around with his friends!!!One day you will find yourself that you changed a lot,you are not interested in the same things as before and life is difficult!For sure it's your husband mistake,because when they are married they feel safe and they are forgetting about wife's needs!!!They are having actually housemaid without paying!No matter if you get married because of love or money,or who knows what,most of the time you will regret it!Enjoy your freedom,or don't listen to me!!!