Ladies, if your husband had an affair.................?

J Somethingorother	I pity you having to wrestle with this dilemma. It's difficult and I recommend if you don't know how you feel to seek counseling. Even in one session they can provide points you need to think over and consider in making a decision. I guess I myself would want to know why he did it. I would need to know if there was something wrong with me, or if it's a weakness on his part that has a chance of being repeated. I might be able to forgive, but forget is a whole different matter. I doubt our marriage could survive. I just don't think I'd have it in me to trust again. I wish you the best.

ksmpmjoll	I say hellooooo to L.....A..... - how you doin'? ... and Amanda

MissHazel	By making yourself feel better in your confession - your scrambled your wife like an egg. You have to allow her to hurt now and come to grips with this. She might choose not to forgive you - that was the risk you took when you had the affair to begin with. Forgiveness takes time and if you care for her you'll stick by her while she works thru her pain.

jules vane	Done and over........

81 Honda	I say, no I can't forgive. I believe that if you go outside of that relationship, it's not love. When I was in love, I never wanted to be with anyone else. I mean yes, I noticed the occasional attractive man walking down the street, but I NEVER WANTED anyone but the man that I was already in love with.

Julie J	I think I would try to work on it, but it will be so hard for her. I think it is good that you told and that will give you a better chance of making it work. Good luck

Ducky S	No. I wouldn't. If he wasn't trustworthy in the first place, why would he be down the line? People that have that trait - that ability to do something so lowlife to another human -- people that are simply capable of that are always capable of that and you don't deserve her. I hope you do fall to pieces.

Wifa 4 Lifa	I would tell him goodbye........

Martha My Dear	Are you saying that him admitting it on his own, instead of her finding out , would somehow soften the blow?? No!! You don't know women very well , do you? lol She will still feel betrayed and hurt...just because his guilty conscious drove him to confess...does not exempt him!!!

AnGeLeYeZ	I'd give him one more chance coz it's only human to make mistakes BUT he better mean it when he says sorry coz if it happens again, he's out the door!

Nicky G	i say, "if you loved me, you wouldn't have done it. i'm filing for divorce. have a nice life." the fact that the wife knows NOTHING of it means nothing. i could forgive, but you NEVER, NEVER, EVER forget something like that. my son's father used to cheat on me all the time, and though he's changed his ways, i am liable to throw it in his face every other day. it's a lifetime scar and it will forever hurt.

Mj	well for me definitely forgive! if iit hasnt happened before, if its the second time.. NO WAY! my fiance' cheated recently and even though i proved to him that i knew he was cheatin.. he still didnt admit! but later he said oh im sorry, and that sort of thing, but still he said he hadn done anything with that lady! and we seperated.. i was sooo mad at hiim and the rest of the world but now ( after 1 month) im thinking of getting back with him.. i think i can forgive that. i love him too much

Odessa R	Fat chance in He++ ..been there done that No I didn't forgive the 2 timing creep !!

Premo Mom	I haven't been in that exact situation. But I would say don't tell her if she hasn't a clue. Just don't do it again. Don't ruin what you and she have right now, because if she knew, then you would have hell to pay and a very long road back to happiness. Don't ruin it for her. Don't cheat it's WRONG!!!

bifgrl31	When you lose trust with someone you have nothing. It is not something that just comes back.

teufels kind	i would leave him a merrage is a comitment to eachother even if he told me i would be crushed but if i found out well i would pull a Lerana bobbet

Pale	I would say bye.....guilty once, will be guilty twice....

*~BETHY~*	I'd say, "Your sh!t is laying on the front lawn, better get it before the trash man does!"

Becca R	yes, initially. but i would be so hurt that it would ruin the trust and therefore the relationship.

Violet Pearl	no need for words. I'd cut off his balls, fry them in garlic and shove them down his throat. That would stop him from blurting out in future.. not to mention any hanky-panky ;-D

hey hey. i'm here to stay.	i say you...need to leave or die. that's what i would say. no forgiveness. because if you loved your wife and felt so bad about it you should've thought about all of that before you cheated, that way your guilty conscience could be justified, but if you didn't feel bad til after, i'd still leave your ***.

Penguin Gal	I'd say I hope he knows the name of a good lawyer

Digit 4156	aids is to strong in this country ,he would not be my husband long

the_guardian_of_destiny	I would still dump him....welll, her in this case. (Im not a guy)

ClassyGemini	Nope.. its a done deal.. pack your things.. i'm calling you a cab..

Scotty	Trying to clear your conscience my friend?

EllisFan	you took vows for better or worse. i say give him ONE more try, forgiveness is part of a marriage.

kja63	Once a cheater, ALWAYS a cheater. He would be out the door so fast, he'd never know what hit him.

bor_rabnud	Yes my dear

L...A...	yes!!! If he wont keep in touch with the woman!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!â€¦