My Husband is abusive and doesn't see it!?

stephen k	Just because he doesn't hit you does not mean he isn;t engaging in abuse, which he is. That could even be assault. Have you thought about defending yourself (a kick to his crotch) or will this make things worse. get in touch with a woman's abuse group for help

dream girl	face him, ask him why did he change his attitude and behavior and tell him that it hurts u, and if he really loves u that is mean he needs u healthy and safe him and for his children, but if is getting worse and start hitting u should call the cops immediately, it won't make u any good if u live in house with a broken dignity

MM	He refuses to take any responsibility for hurting you, and you're questioning what to do? Don't waste any more time trying to persuade him; you might get him angry and wind up with another sprain or worse. If you don't have friends and family who would want to help you out of this situation, there are free resources out there for you. Take advantage of them and get out.

HYPNOTIZING	Leave him. Get a job, study for your license.

Kat	you need to leave him for that.. abuse is a deal breaker in a marriage or relationship.. and that is abuse. you could wait till he goes to work then get someone to take you and the kids to a shelter or to someone you can stay with.. call the police and get the incident on report.. it will get much worse now that hes done that and got by with it.. good luck

FBI(female body inspector)	tell the police or the emergencyroom

tammy g	wow,really dont know where to start,of course hes going to blame you,hes not going to admit he was at fault ,get over that,figure out what your going to do.your in a abusive relationship which will only get worse.your children do not need to grow up watching mommy getting hurt.please make a plan,first get your license,get a part time job,save your money,open up a secret account,you never know when your going to need it.dont depend on him for your happiness.if it gets worse find a shelter or go stay with family,he sounds very imamture if hes putting you in wrestling holds.you deserve better. please get help..take care

Hoping he will bless me with #1	We don't play fight. We may wrestle but we do it gently. I think your husband is out of line. He was overbearing and is the cause of your knee injury. It's okay to play but in this case I think he was purposely trying to hurt you. After he saw you pleading to get up, he should have gotten off you immediately. I would start by letting him know how I feel and asking for an apology and reassurance that he won't do that to you again. I would not engage in any more play fighting. Is there some reason why you don't work? I would look for something as the baby got older. You need some kind of money of your own. You need to learn to drive (go to driving school or ask a relative) and get a license and car. If he were to leave you today it sounds as if you wouldn't be able to support yourself or your two kids. You need to start doing you and doing what it takes to become independent.

kroe_6	A guy holding you down against your will is abuse.... It has to be addressed someway, either leaving him or convincing him that this is abuse.... you should still be able to get a job and live on your own.... you do not have to put up with abuse, that's what abusers rely on is you putting up with it.... You can come to my house and stay...My wife and I will be glad to help...he thinks he's clever but he's being abusive.... He needs to either change (which is possible) or you need to leave... do not put up with this.

mamabear	You need to get out. Take him to court for alimony and child support. In the meantime, ask family or friends for a place to stay.

ptmamas	So you're confused BUT you know it's abuse. What I don't understand is why you or your kids are still there. I wish women would realize what they are going through in an abusive relationship their kids are dealing with it 20 times as hard. Watching their mom get "roughed" up and then watching her walk around on crutches and with bruises. How do you think that makes them feel. DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT THE FIRST TIME IT HAPPENS IF FOR NOONE ELSE ..DO IT FOR YOUR KIDS. jeez

Vanessa	Definitely not your fault! Who forced him to hold you in a headlock and block the door when you tried to leave? Nobody, it was his choice, not yours! Abusers have this uncanny ability to waylay blame onto everyone else except themselves. Soon, he will have you, and everyone else around you convinced it was your fault, that's how the 'I deserved to get hit' mentality happens. This incident is a warning about your future. If he does it once, he will do it again. So you best think about leaving - you might not be so lucky next time and he might kill you!

Uncle Dud	Try telling him how you feel when he is doing it. Sometimes this will bring abusers around.

â™¥Juliette Capuletâ™¥	honey i think you should report it to the police...men cant take advantage of women...we also have the rights like they do...so...try reporting it to an abuse hotline or the police..i am sorry to hear about your news...i hope your kids are fine...send regards to them....just remember God is with you...ok..call somebody You really need help!! God Bless, Sharpay Yasz,Get well soon!

DJ - mom of 2	You are correct. Don't let him make you believe otherwise. You need to seek help. If he cares about how you feel and truely loves you, then he will see a counselor. You may need to give him an altimatum: you see a counselor, or I will ....... Please don't let it slide. Abusive relationships almost always start out this way. They say, "But I never hit you." What's next? Get it straight now, or next time it will be worse. PLEASE, take care of yourself and your children. Good luck.

karMA_DAME	you see it, recognize it you need to save yourself are you waiting to be choked out (oh, but he already almost did that) seriously, this can escalate into something you don' t want don't wait around for the worst

noob hustler	Divorce!

onceisenoughilearnedmylesson	It's always "your" fault, and it always will be. The longer you stay, the harder it will be to leave. Trust me...after 22 years, I finally got the courage to leave a similar situation, but mostly mental abuse, only occasionally physical. Regardless, go see an attorney, and get out while you can!

ericsmaria	Just because he hasnt hit you doesnt mean he is abusing you. There is also mental and verbal abuse. If you are worried about your well being which you should be. Get out. Dont use you not having money or a job be an excuse. Get help where you can. It's better to be really broke than dead.

Switch	You need to ask God for help so he could make you realize that you are picking the wrong kind of men. It obvious to me that you have been in this predicament before. So learn from your mistakes and move on. If this is your first experience with abuse I suggest you take control of your life. We cant help you here unless you are willing to help yourself.

Charles	What you should do is talk to him about it... Tell him he is being too rough and you want him to calm down a bit. On the other hand, if you're overreacting to the situation at hand he may just be thinking in his head that you might want to do something like hit him or something. Oh and the wrestling beats me.... Never heard of someone getting their mate in a head lock to calm them down... not to be mean but it's pretty funny....

Cinnamon	You have a controlling, sadistic, verbally, abusive pig for a husband. Make a plan, get the hell out of there asap....

Betrayed and Insane	Please get out of that relationship right now I am from an abusive relationship its going to get worse if you dont leave, please trust me, call the cops, dont even think about getting help for him, he will hurt you get out now please, do it for the sake of your and your kids

Uncle John	Leave him.

zeusifer1973	um yeah, you got some family somewhere that will help you get on your own 2 feet. get out of the abusive situation. P.S. archangel...your a retard, you just missed the short bus and haven't realised it yet.

Cookie Monster	Oh my! I think you need to find a way at least temporarily, to get out of there until he understands the gravity of the situation. I am no expert on domestic abuse, but you may need to make it a permanent move.

paul s	well sounds like there needs to be a few changes.but ill leave that up to you to decide what does.

ayyyyy12	You need to get out of there. Go to a domestic violence shelter.

Lankan Sweetheart	honey call the cops....if you let this go on..he will hurt you really bad...and you do not want to be in that position..so he tries that stuff again...you call the cops and tell someone as well of whats happening and don't be afraid..think of your children..do you want them raised in that sort of environment..get out before it's too late...

American Beauty	..what bothers ME is that you haven't divorced him yet!