My husband?

grafvonzahl	There are two facts you must really understand: #1: ALL women that are hit by their husbands believe that they can change them somehow. #2: A violent husband NEVER changes. Sorry, I do not have better news for you. Leave him, it is absolutely the only choice you have.

Ralph T	Your husband is an abusive man, you need to get out before he ends up seriously injuring you or your kids. He will never change. you need to get divorced and move on. believe this man will not be changed. he may stop for a short period of time but will abuse you again.

Been There Done That	You can't change a hitter......My dad would get drunk and would hit mom.....that was always his excuse when he would come home with roses or a gift.....please forgive me......I won't do it again......Right!!!! The next time he got drunk WHAM!!!! If your man is sober when he hits you He doesn't have an excuse......He is just mean. My mom ended up leaving......I was 18 and my sister was 16. We are still scarred from it......both of us fear our husbands hitting us when they are angry even though they haven't.....Sometimes we provoke them to hit us and still they haven't. You need to think about your children and what is good for them.

bethan2028	I am sorry to say unless he really want to change he wont. for the children's sack leave and stay gone. if you need help with this contact your local YWCA and they could probly help you.

Schwinn	You cannot change him. Physical abuse is never OK. He needs anger management. You need to get yourself and your children out and to a safe place until he gets help. File a restraining order against him. I am all for working through problems in marriages. But abuse is a deal breaker.

Tara P	I am sorry that you are in this situation. Have you asked him to seek counseling when he is not in an agitated state? If he doesn't, and doesn't change, you must leave him with your children. You can go to a safe place and file for divorce. Abuse only gets worse, not better and your children will be traumatized for a very long time, if not forever, if you do not stand up for yourself and them. You can do it. I hope you have someone you can trust. It is never okay to hit someone.

Oswald W	Find out all you can about Battered Wives and how to approach them for help in an emergency. Change should come from him without your help.

MANPIG	Learn karate and kick his balls up around his throat

engineer46526	You can't change him! And don't start thinking that you can, because i promise you it will never happen... He will do it again. When you have a husband like that, get out! You and your kids do not deserve to be in that situation. He will cry and tell you he has changed, but beware! it will happen again, and it only gets worse. You need to get yourself and your kids out of that enviroment immediately...

superthunda	LEAVE HIM!!!!! dont ever stay with someone who hits you ya need to get a restraining order on him and take your kids and go.. he may start to abuse the children to do not stay in that situation or you could end up dead.

CountTheDays	You can only change yourself. Get yourself and your children on an assertiveness training course.

damn spitchus is lost	you cannot change anyone unless they are really willing, he has to change for himself not for you , if he is abusing you i would leave, please consider the abuse can and most likely will move onto your kids. not only that but they are learning that is how to treat another human being or that it is OK to be treated that way. you must ask yourself who do you love more your children and yourself or a man who obviously doesn't love you? good luck

junkie 4 yummy	The best way to change him is leave him. Call the police adn file a reoprt! Take yourself and your kids to a women's shelter. They have all of the resources you need to start over again. You are simply teaching your children that spousal abuse is okay, and that it will be okay if they one day do it to their spouses. Do the right thing and STOP THIS NOW!

leonard s	leave,leave now go to the police, forget changing him it wont work.do not put yourself and your kids threw this. time for a new life with the pain and danger.

Lori K	You can't change him. You can only change yourself. When you are ready for help, here is what you need to know. A marriage is abusive if one of the partners physically or emotionally harms the other. If you've made the decision to leave an abusive marriage, you must formulate a plan to escape safely. Follow these steps. Instructions Difficulty: Challenging Steps Step One Learn the location of your nearest crisis center. For a list of domestic violence crisis centers, visit the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence Web site (see Resources below), or call (800) 799-SAFE. Step Two Gradually assert your independence. Discover your own interests and talents. Join a community class to learn floral arranging, interior design, scrapbooking or another hobby. Take a course in accounting or real estate, or some other skill that can give you financial independence. Attending classes is also a good way to make friendships outside of your relationship. Step Three Understand your problem at home. It's common for victims of domestic violence to blame themselves. The more you learn about domestic violence, through books and Web sites, the more you will realize your situation is not your fault. You'll also learn to recognize the warning signs of domestic violence and how to protect yourself from an abuser. Step Four Forge stable, sincere friendships with people you can trust. You'll need solid support as you prepare to leave an abusive marriage, and your new friends may be able to provide emotional and financial support temporarily. Step Five Realize you can't stay in an abusive marriage, no matter how many promises your partner makes. You must prepare to leave, before the violence escalates into a potentially life-threatening situation. Step Six Contact a family law attorney to press charges or to obtain a restraining order against your abuser. This may seem like a dramatic step, but it is necessary to preserve your physical and emotional health, and, possibly, your life. Overall Tips & Warnings * Before you leave, have all the evidence you need to take your abuser to court, including medical records, police reports and photographs of injuries. * You have the right to receive complete restitution from your abuser in a timely manner, according to federal law. * The psychological effects of spousal abuse can be profound and may include a deep sense of betrayal, feelings of worthlessness and a firm belief that there is no viable existence outside of an abusive marriage. It's vital that you seek help from a licensed therapist who has training in the psychology of domestic violence so you can come to terms with your ordeal and start the healing process. Resources * Get a list of crisis centers in your area at the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, or call (800) 799-SAFE. Overall Things You'll Need * Support system * Transportation

shannie	YOU won't change him. HE has to be the one to want to change. If he wants to change, he'll probably need professional help to find other ways to vent his anger. Do Not let him continue like this. Get away if he continues to act out on his violence. It will only get worse if something doesn't change soon.

Juillet	you cant change a man. once he starts it will only get worst. unfortunately the best way is to get out of the situation, try marriage counseling if he will let you. but he is probably possessive. sorry but the best thing in the end for you and also the kids is to get out.

suzlaa1971	There are different ways to handle this...either suggest counseling and/or anger management, or put your foot down and that enough is enough. You can't change someone, only they can change for themselves. If he's not willing to, then it's time to get out.

drfriske	change yourself first but do not put up with hitting

zajucomom	Leave his dumb @ss.

bluemist	Medicate him and a 5 year stint in the pen... good luck

Moondog	Can't change him - a man that hits a woman is a coward and always will be. Either expect to get hit or get away from him. Your choice.

MGS5: Solid Stewie	You can't change an abusive husband. Well, I imagine you could if you scrambled his brains with an iron skillet to the back of the head, but the best bet is to get out of the relationship.

zzHoUnDzz	leave him

Marriedtothearmy 2	YOU cannot change him. He needs therapy...He will continue to hit you. There is no reason for a man to hit a woman. Remember that. What are you a punching bag?? He has an illness...and you are not the cure.

BAnne	You can't change him. You need to get yourself and those children out of the house as soon as possible and into someplace safe. Stay with a close friend or family member.

TRAUMA	go to a doc

Jessie H	What makes you think you can change him? You also have 2 kids to think about - get out or kick him out.

Tim	dont try to change anyone. Why do women think they can change men?

Ash	leave him...never allow a man to abuse you